Mums are dying because of where they live and lack public services - AIBU to ask for your experiences?

[cookie4640]

I’m posting here for traffic and because Lucy’s sister has asked us to raise awareness. Lucy tragically took her own life recently after suffering with PND. Her sister has highlighted failings in Lucy’s care whilst suffering with PND and is on a mission to change care for postnatal women with mental health problems. Please please read and share the bbc article and also if you’re happy to, share your experiences - good or bad about your postnatal aftercare and your mental health
www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c0k846r7102o?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR2AroPbnVbj8IeHo7A2i9E7GGzW1wHp98FglSdgiO5efdvYJ4aPWOqaIIs_aem_RCBW4ltvURT-NZnxxiOzlw

I experienced PNA after my oldest was very poorly, as soon as I closed my eyes I had visions of her dying so I went weeks without sleep. Care where we lived in London was very poor, but my parents came and collected me and baby and we stayed with them, I was suicidal and my husband was scared that if he went to work he would come back and find me dead, I needed constant supervision. I begged to be admitted to a mother abd baby unit but they said I wasn't severe enough. However, I got excellent care in the area my parents were in, and improved quite quickly with the right meds.
For 2 years I was adamant that I couldn't have a 2nd baby, the thought of all that hapenning again terrified me. But I met with my psychologist and local mental health midwife and we made a really robust plan of support, and we had a 2nd 3.5 years after the first, and I got pnd very mildly, but had quick access to support in place.

I was suicidal with my first, I didn't want to die, but just couldn't keep living with such internal pain, and if my parents hadn't come and scooped us up, I don't know if I would be here today.

I got PND after DS1 but not severely. I was living in wealthy Surrey and my care was excellent. It seems very much a postcode lottery.

@Bushmillsbabe thank you so much for sharing, I’m sorry you had such a bad time but so grateful you got treatment in a different area x

Thank you, me too.
I'm suprised that your post hasn't attracted more responses, I know so many mums who had PND/PNA. I think for some it can be a painful experience to recall it and even the act of writing about it can be upsetting. I definitely still hold a lot of pain over missing out on the 1st few months with my oldest, my husband and parents cared for her when I couldn't, and I also fear what might have hapenned if I hadn't had great family support, and a psychiatrist who really listened to me.
But I talk about it to try to help others open up,there is still so much shame and secrecy around postnatal mental illness and by opening up it hopefully encourages others to do the same

@Bushmillsbabe I'm surprised too, I was hoping this could’ve reached lots of people to talk about PND and make people realise they aren’t alone, but also to highlight the disparity between areas and that it must be ended 😢 if Lucy had received the same level of support as mums in other areas then she’d still be with us and her babies would still have their mummy.

Is there any way this could be bumped into more sight by hq (if that makes sense?)