Sad to leave my babies to go on work trip

[pineconny]

My two are 2 and 4. I need to go on a work trip soon and it's bringing up a lot of emotions.

I have gone on work trips before, but really swallowed my feelings about it and I only realised after I left my job, how much I hated going on these trips.

After the last trip ( 1 year ago ) where I had to leave for a week, my DD was terrified I would leave her again. It was really sad. I FaceTimed her a couple of times while I was away and a few months later I randomly FaceTimed my husband while I was downstairs and he was upstairs with DD and she lost it, because she thought I had left again.

I left that job, one of the reasons was because they needed me to travel more than I already was. In my last quarter in the job, I travelled twice. Once for 3 nights a once for 5 nights.

It just makes me sad. My kids get really upset when I leave. I'm with them all the time ( unless they're at nursery ). At night I stay with them until they fall asleep.

Anyway it's made me emotional that I need to go away again. I never dealt with it properly last time and just pushed away that I felt sad. Am I being dramatic ?

The last times, they'd stay home and my husband / mother in law and nanny etc would look after them/ drive them around. But essentially they'd be home.

This time we are thinking to move the whole operation to grandmas house. I feel like they'll miss me less that way ? They love going to grandmas house and their aunts and uncles can visit etc. I think they'll have more fun there and miss me less.
What else can I do to help them ? / and myself.

Husband would also go and stay at grandmas house.

I don't want to call you dramatic as I don't want minimise your distress. However you say your with your children all the time. Do you never take time for yourself or go see friends? I think as children get older it's healthy for them to see parents who have a balance in life, who see friends, model social skills and have a life outside the family.

I'm of the opinion that children benefit from a wide range of caregivers and building relationships with others help their development. You obviously have a secure and loving attachment with your children and this won't be broken by being away for a few nights. It isn't going to traumatise your children and I think you having time away instead of spending every waking minute you're not at work with your children is healthy for all involved. It'll give your children a chance to spend quality time with their dad and grandparents on their own.

Thanks for being so kind. I do have hobbies ( but I do them during my lunch breaks ) and socialise a lot with school people, while my children are sound too. I don't tend to spend much time away from them unless they're at nursery.

I think they'll have a blast at grandmas house with all extended family.

Nothing helpful to add other than I emphasise! Leaving Sunday for work trip and dreading how much I miss my kids !

I would stop staying with them until they fall asleep and wean them off you a bit ready for the trip.