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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Year 10 and homework

4 replies

Honey2 · 11/11/2024 20:35

My son (year 10) has always been defiant and reluctant when it comes to doing homework, but now in year 10 it’s obviously ramped up in quantity as he moves towards GCSEs. We’ve had numerous chats about the benefits of putting the effort in for these next 2 years, and in calm and rational moments he agrees and will begrudgingly do the work. unfortunately that’s only half the time. The rest of the time it can be a battle ground (as much as we try not letting it be!)

We’ve done the carrot approach (small treats like sweets / hot choc after 20 mins of work or bigger rewards for good attitude/effort) We’ve also resorted to the metaphorical stick I.e removing his phone / blocking games / restricting time out with friends at weekends (as a last resort!) if he was refusing to do the work. None of it works consistently.

Just to be clear we are not asking for him to go over and above - just do the work the school set each week. He doesn’t find school easy, but he is smart enough and is predicted grades around an old school ‘C’ if he puts the effort in.

The latest challenge (and my AIBU) is that he spends most of his evening on Snapchat video calling friends (fine) but…. He refuses to stop the call when doing home work claiming he can do both at the same time. I’ve witnessed that he cant. We aren’t talking friends quietly in the background, we’re talking groups of 3 or 4 people laughing and joking on the calls, a complete distraction.

Reasoning with him on the fact this is a distraction falls on deaf ears, removing his phone results in arguments.

help?! AIBU to think he should come off video call when it’s homework time. How do others deals with teenagers and homework???

thanks for making it to the end 😊

OP posts:
Baconandddddeggs · 11/11/2024 21:46

Surely the consequence of not doing homework will be sanction at school such as detention?

you can lead a horse to water but can’t make them drink.

Ultimately it his life and his GCSE’s.

I’ve always encouraged mine to work hard and supported / helped when they’ve wanted me to.

but if they chose to not do the work - that is their choice and they will reap what they sow.

Ablondiebutagoody · 11/11/2024 21:58

No phone until homework is done?

foodtoorder · 11/11/2024 22:06

Take the phone away surely?

foodtoorder · 11/11/2024 22:06

Regardless of arguments, you are the parent and he needs to respect that.

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