or is a thumbs up NOT an RSVP?

[Ifthisiswheretheworldisheadingcountmeout]

I think I've entered the Twilight Zone of communication where emojis have taken over... and now I’m stuck decoding hieroglyphics, apparently!

For example I sent out a party invite with a simple, “Please RSVP by [date] with number of people.” and received a number of thumbs up and celebration emojis. So I’m thinking, Fantastic! People are coming! but I had to text back to check how many people the 👌 represented and...Turns out, a thumbs up does not actually mean “yes.” Which has left me a bit baffled tbh.

Then this week I sent a work email with a very specific question, like, “Which of the following dates can you attend?” And what do I get back? Thumbs up emojis. Two of them. What does that even mean? Do all the dates work? None of them? Did you just like the question? Did your finger slip? Is this how we communicate at work now??

I can't even presume it's an age thing as I’m only in my mid-30s and the people I've contacted have ranged from mid 20's to early 60's. However it's making me feel seriously old!

I find myself longing for the days of actual responses. Sentences. Full words! Instead, I’m over here trying to translate emoji to English like I’m a professional cryptographer.

In conclusion: Words. Let’s bring them back.

AIBU?

People are flakey and mentally lazy, generally.

I think it's always been like this but getting worse.

Two occasions in the 1980s (pre email text etc) family /friends just didn't turn up to stay as arranged. I had to chase them down over the following days to find out what was happening. Change of plans but they didn't think to tell me.

I host at home and recently sent an email to my next guest to find out what time to expect them for check in. Got a message back saying they were arriving a day later. Still no arrival time given. If I hadn't checked with them would I even know they were coming a day late?

I think a thumbs up just means "received and read"?
Actual response will come later.

Thumbs up to me means I acknowledge this message.
If the message said let me know by x date, then my thumbs up would mean ‘I acknowledge this message I will let you know by x date’

Thumbs up is the rudest one. It's so passive aggressive.

@LilyBartsHatShop @AmberCrow yeah that's fair. Then life happens and they don't actually rsvp at all. Or at least that's what happens to me unless I do something there and then!

The work email though...I'm not ready for emojis at work. Wonder if there were threads like this in the noughties about 'lol' and 'ttyl'!

This.

I completely agree. Though have been told that's a 'me issue' by a few people now!

Yep this! A thumbs up wouldn't mean I'm coming, it would mean I'll RSVP as requested!

To me, a thumbs up is just a quick acknowledgement and not an actual response.

Even at work? Didn't give a 'please respond by x date' in the work email. Was just 'let me know which if the following you can do'. We work in a pretty fast paced office so usually the understanding is to reply asap and definitely within 24 hours. I don't email this particular group often though, but that is the company standard vibe I'd say.

I agree OP, I would find all that very confusing! I also would’ve assumed the thumbs up meant they were coming, as I don’t need a thumbs up to tell me just that tneyve read the message.

When organising an event in a WhatsApp group that hasn’t been previously discussed, people will always respond with words, ie:
-Hey guys, does anyone fancy a film night at mine on Friday? Can get a takeaway and have a nice cosy night!
-Yeah sounds fab, I’ll bring some chocolates!
-Amazing I’m in, what time do you want us?
-Sorry I’m out Friday but I’ll be there for the next one!
-Sounds good, I’ll bring some snacks too, can we watch a Christmas film!!?

And that way you know exactly who’s in and who isn’t, and can properly discuss/make plans.

However we do use emojis as a form of response when it’s something that’s already discussed and we’re just sorting final numbers. So for example I’ve organised a Sunday roast at a pub in a few weeks and my group talked about it verbally at another event and many said they were keen, but before booking I wanted final numbers so sent a message out saying “I know a lot of us are interested in the roast on Dec 1st, thinking of booking for 1pm, respond with an emoji of choice if you’re deffo in and I’ll get it booked this evening!”

And then you can easily just count the emojis so know how many to book final places for, without filtering through a load of messages, as seen in attached pic…

Clever idea using the emojis that way! I also like the range of choices 😂

This. I thought this was pretty obvious.

Is it? In all circumstances?

I can see it being a passive aggressive response if someone says: Sorry, I don't think we are compatible but I wish you all the best.

However, not if someone texts saying: I have booked a table now for 8pm, see you there!

It has a place and I think in OPs first example it means they have read the message and they are happy about it but they will let her know later if they are coming or not. In the second example I think it's meant as both options work, but I would have wanted to clarify that one.

Aaahaha yes, people can get quite creative 🤣