I need a kick up the arse re weight

[MammaKel]

I'm 30 next week and 250lbs at 5 foot 7, I wear a size 22 and I'm just extremely unhappy.

It started about 9 years ago when I was 10/11 stone and my family especially my dad started saying I was fat and disgusting and I guess it had the opposite effect they wanted as I started eating more thinking well if I'm fat then what difference does it make and got into a really bad mindset.

I suffer with mental health issues and I think I may have ADHD and the last 8 years has been multiple take aways a week, drinking multiple sodas a day, developing fibromyalgia and just not moving a lot at all - no excuse just a fat lazy cow.

I want to change, I've spent my 20s being fat and I don't want to spend my 30s being fat .. I have two young children and want to be able to do things with them, live longer, feel more attractive etc but I really need my arse handing to me and some motivation.

I was planning on cutting out sodas and energy drinks all together, cutting my calories to 1800cals a day, obviously stopping the take aways and trying to move more I have an indoor treadmill so was going to try and work up to walking 1-2 hours a day and getting my 10,000 steps in but is this too much too soon? Am I setting myself up to fail?

I just don't know what to do about it all.

Get on the Mounjaro! It’s been. Game changer for me! 34lbs down in 10 weeks

I'm a bit scared of using weight loss injections but I'll do some research.

Thank you

I’m sorry you are feeling unhappy and that your family have been cruel about your weight.
Personally, I do better when I focus on health and nutrition rather than cutting calories. Focusing on nourishing my body with good quality food (lots of fruit & veg, high protein and fibre) is delicious and feels like an act of self love rather than denying myself calories.
I have also started making water kefir which is a delicious fizzy drink but healthy. Maybe a good replacement for soda?
It sounds like you are wanting to reclaim health and happiness. That’s a great ambition. Focus on that. Good luck

What is your daily diet like? What are you eating and drinking?

Do you have a car? Get rid of that & start walking the kids to school. Get from A to B on foot, get your steps in that way?

@MammaKel cut out UPF, it will help hugely

I've never been on a restricted calorie diet (disclaimer!) but my flatmate and I both found it easier to keep to small changes in diet and fitness than loads of big ones all at once. I think you know this yourself because you ask whether you're setting yourself up to fail.

What do you think is an easy start that you can keep up? Like only drinking water after dinner and before bed? Walking 10 minutes around the block on your lunch break?

Thank you, that's a good way of looking at it.

My daily diet is horrible, I'm actually embarrassed to say but it's usually no breakfast, a sausage roll, crisps and chocolate bar and energy drink and then tea is more often than not a take away and a soda or a oven tea.

Unfortunately my kids nursery is 7 miles away and they're both disabled so not possible but getting out for a walk is a good idea, I just find I struggle with my joints and fibromyalgia flare ups so thinking I'll need to build it up gradually.

I wouldn't go too hard in terms of cutting overall good intake ie calories to 1800, but focus on changing habits and making incremental improvements which you can sustain and feel positive about.

Replacing the sodas/energy drinks and takeaways seems like a sensible first step, if you are having so many then maybe cut down to having them one day a week so you have something to look forward to and don't feel like you have failed if you have one. As long as you are doing better than previously, that is a good change.

Aiming to move every day is great, maybe initially have a specific target every other day so you give yourself permission to have a rest day. Initially it will feel like a big change.

Agree with PP on emphasis being on focusing on self care and treating yourself to plenty of delicious healthier options rather than calorie counting and overall restriction as such.

I totally agree with this. It sounds like you are just going for convenience food rather than indulging, which is totally understandable as you are probably knackered, overwhelmed etc. So jumping to a goal of cutting calories without an actual plan probably is setting yourself up to fail.
Decide on 1 thing to start with, like eating a high protein breakfast. Have a think about how to actually make it work (eg prep the night before?) & get it into your routine. Then think of another good habit to add into the mix.

I’d suggest some therapy first to process the reasons you’ve been overeating and work out how to address those. Once you’ve done that you can start making lifestyle and dietary changes. Weight loss injections or diets aren’t going to solve your MH issues. Your diet is a symptom of you MH. Be kind to yourself and get help

Thank you everyone.

I appreciate the therapy suggestion but I genuinely think it's convenience and a serotonin boost, which is keeping me in this cycle plus exhaustion and I think losing the weight will help me mentally.

I'll look into it though and everything everyone's suggested and see if I can make some good lifestyle changes.

Can you do something like meal planning so you have minimal effort, decent quality meals for the week ahead? Stuff like ping a baking potato, chuck it on some salad out of a bag with a pre-cooked chicken breast or tin of salmon and it's probably as much effort and washing up as a beige oven meal.

Definitely agree with pp saying think of it as looking after yourself with good food rather than limiting yourself 😀good luck you can do it!