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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Does he just not care?

10 replies

FedUpandEatingChocolate · 07/11/2024 21:20

I'm furious with DH and he can't understand why.

He's got man flu, I called up the GP for him this morning and got him an appointment. No thanks, he didn't report back after the appointment, and when I asked he just muttered antibiotics and turned back to his laptop.

Meanwhile, my asthma has gone from stable and controlled to severe and uncontrolled in the past year. It's really affected my life as I can't do much without being breathless. My chest hurts pretty much 24/7.

Today I had much waited for lung function tests. DH didn't offer to drive me to the hospital, I asked if he could give me a lift back and he said no. So I walked there and back, despite not being allowed to use my asthma inhalers for 24 hours ahead of the tests.

On the way back I sent him a WhatsApp with a brief update.

I get home and he doesn't say anything. Later, when it's quieter I ask if he got my text. He bites my head off and said he didn't get a text from me. I correct myself and say "WhatsApp" and he just says yeah.

He's done fuck all around the house the past two days despite being home sick. I've had to keep going for the past year, with no allowances made.

To me, his behaviour smacks of just not caring. It's really not been any different the past year.

AIBU in thinking he doesn't give a shit and nothing is going to change.

OP posts:
Amyknows · 07/11/2024 21:23

That's past the point of not caring op. He left you to walk and didn't check on you given the health issue you have. And then to point blank help you when you asked. Leave, he is basically telling you to go. Sorry this is happening.

Gettoachiro · 07/11/2024 21:24

I'm sorry but he doesn't give a shit. If he even cared one little bit he wouldn't have been like this.

There is no excuse for it. You are better off alone than with him. Get rid.

Thepeopleversuswork · 07/11/2024 21:26

Remind me what the point of him is?

Catza · 07/11/2024 21:27

No he is not going to change. When you are in your next, hopefully better relationship, please remember that an adult male is perfectly capable of booking his own GP appointment.

Lammveg · 07/11/2024 21:28

OP I'm really sorry he's treating you this way. A person who cares about you would not treat you like this.

Pomegranatecarnage · 07/11/2024 21:30

You deserve so much better than this. He sounds vile and completely self-centred. I’m really sorry that you’re being treated like that.

FedUpandEatingChocolate · 07/11/2024 21:35

I had kind of hoped that I would be told I'm overreacting. It's pretty damning.

OP posts:
LightSpeeds · 07/11/2024 21:45

It sounds like he couldn't care less about you, I'm afraid. It sounds like it's an ongoing thing, too (rather than he's just in a crappy mood because he's unwell).

Sorry x

SareBear87 · 07/11/2024 21:46

Omg OP! That's horrific!!!
I'm asthmatic and at the slightest wheeze my DH is hunting for my inhaler like it's the holy grail. Even if I insist it's ok.
I'm so sorry you're being treated this way. Please look after yourself - and put him in the bin.

itsmylife7 · 07/11/2024 21:47

He allowed you to walk with severe asthma....absolutely disgusting.

What a heartless bastard.

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