Little one due to start nursery and staff are openly talking about how hungover they are in front of me and child.

[Heartbeats18]

What would you do? I went into nursery yesterday morning for a Christmas photo shoot ( my daughter is due to start her first day Thursday) I'm very anxious about her starting anyway. There was 2 staff in the room with me and my 1 year old, plus other small children and the photographer and I heard a staff member openly say how hungover she was, the other staff member said I can't believe your still hungover and she went on about her feeling ill with it all morning. It just didn't sit right with me at all. I work with SEN teens and wouldn't dream of speaking like this in front of parents. I felt so uneasy as I thought to myself that she is going to be looking after my 1 year old and her whole attitude just screamed she wasn't bothered. My sister said to complain but I don't know if I'm overreacting to the situation because I'm already anxious. I didn't get great vibes from the nursery when I viewed it but it was the only one available with the days I needed. I have arranged other childcare as I just don't feel comfortable sending her there. I'm aware people drink ( I myself like a drink, although I haven't had a drink for 2 years because it's hard enough being a parent to baby nevermind being hungover aswell!) what would I even say as I want to withdraw her before she even starts?!?

I would say exactly why you are withdrawing her. Nursery management can't change what they don't know.

so unprofessional and would make me wonder what other things they’re slack with.

I would report it to the manager.

No I wouldn't send me child there. But do tell them, why.

It's a shame that so many people don't know how to act with some sort of professionalism in the workplace.

Well done for making other plans for her.

I'd be honest about why you're not going ahead with placement. Say simply you overheard a staff member being at work badly hungover and it didn't sit well with you.

I’m very easy going and I would tell the truth about this.

There can be moments through the nursery years at even the best nurseries where you doubt if something was done properly because you’re not there to see , e.g potty training, nap times, eating well etc (it’s natural as a parent to wonder) but generally everything turns out ok. BUT if you have already seen and heard for yourself that this is how the staff are behaving then how are you supposed to trust or give the benefit of the doubt?

I suspect young staff on minimum wage. I'd cut them some slack. The dc won't know what they are talking about anyway.

I'm very easy going and laid back but I don't feel comfortable sending my baby here when you have a grown woman who clearly has no respect or professionalism. I wouldn't let w family member look after my baby hungover so why would I let a stranger who has no love towards my child. Shes in charge of 0-4 year old children. I'm worried if she has no respect about what she is saying in front of parents then I'd be wondering what goes on behind close doors plus I'm paying a lot for my daughter to go here.

I'd be honest about why you're not sending her there.

They might care, they might not.

But they certainly won't if they don't know!

Yes I'd withdraw your child and tell them why. Your have to trust your nursery.

There's no way I would be sending my child there.

I'd be reporting this to the manager. I'm a nurse and wouldn't dream of talking like this in front of patients (I rarely drink alcohol though, and when I do, it is one unit). I'd be concerned at their ability to do their job safely/effectively if they are still hungover! I'd also worry about what else they would be talking about when out of earshot of parents.

My DCs went to a wonderful nursery. It was a safe, happy place and you could tell straight away how happy and well looked after the children were. My mum (NNEB trained and who then worked her way up to managing a nursery) loved the place. The staff were amazing and the kids thrived. Some had worked there for years, so had looked after my DC from when eldest was a 6m old baby to when my youngest left to start primary school (a span of about 12 years). I was thrilled that my kids went there and had no misgivings or worries. I completely trusted the staff, and their care/devotion to the kids they looked after really helped me to feel less guilty about being a mum going out to work. I was in tears when they both finished there and started school. When we bump into staff locally, they still remember my kids and chat to them. My kids remember them too and have lovely memories of their time there. That's how it should be, IMHO.

I wouldn't send her there, there's a time and a place for talk like that and it's certainly not a nursery!

This.

The pay for nursery staff is poor and it's often very young people working there. If it was a constant/frequent thing I'd worry, but as a one off I wouldn't bother reporting anything. The workers are human.

Maybe I have more anxieties than most my baby is the most precious thing on earth and if adult staff member who was easily mid thirties can't conduct herself professionally around parents and children then it appears to me that she isnt bothered. Regardless of what you get paid, being in charge of newborn babies and young children whilst hungover doesn't make me feel comfortable about sending my daughter there.

Also to add she hasn't even started yet so it doesn't fill me with confidence

No chance, they could still be under the influence

There’s a lot I’d cut them slack for because that’s true but not this. Even on minimum wage, if you are hungover at work in this kind of setting- where dialling it in for a day is no mean feat- the LAST thing you do is make it obvious/talk about it in front of parents!

You need to tell the management though. If they are worth their salt they’ll be mortified and act accordingly.

I wouldn't be cutting anyone any slack in a nursery setting! I would expect the management to train their staff properly in appropriate behaviour/conversations at work.

I'm afraid it makes the nursery seem a bit "rough and ready" OP. I don't blame you for not wanting that for your child.

You're not serious??

I'm 100% certain it wasn't the chance of the DC overhearing words like hungover that concerned the OP, more that the person would be unfit to carry out their work properly...... The person maybe unsteady from feeling dizzy or sick, they may therefore drop a child or fall onto, stumble into a child, they may lose concentration and miss an accident or a child choking etc etc. they may even just fall asleep!

That would all be OK by you cos they're young and on minimum wage???

The two idiots saying cut the staff some slack, they are probably on NMW…are you serious? Are you even a parent?
We TRUST these staff to keep our babies safe whilst we have to work! You know, the children we wished for, spent 9 months growing, love beyond words and are the most precious things in our lives…..and you think it’s ok that they are hungover whilst looking after them??? No, it’s NOT ok and I would not be entrusting that nursery with my children. I would 100% tell the manager why I am no longer enrolling my child.

Yanbu, j wouldn't send my child there either. They need to know why. That is extremely unprofessional at the very least

Doesn't every parent think their baby is the most precious thing ever? Or do you think that just applies to you ?

The joys of preschools and nurseries young staff who r cheap, use a professional childminder with years of experience instead.

YANBU I wouldn't be sending my child here and would be sure to let them know the reason. Very unprofessional!