To be really worried about her mobility?

[Celia24]

On a trip with my mother who is early 60s. She needs frequent breaks to sit down while walking, maybe every 10-15 mins.

We have a day trip planned, train leaving at 10 arriving at destination at 12, then back at 6 again. She was really annoyed to hear we'd be on the go for 6 hours and says we'll need to take a lot of breaks. I'm gutted to hear this as I've been really looking forward to seeing the place.

I am shocked at how she seems older than she is when I see her as still young. Are my expectations wrong or am I right to be concerned?

She is basically saying she's unfit. I see it as quite serious.

Also she has no diagnosed illnesses.

Try to persuade her to see her GP, she might be unfit but its far more likely she is unwell. It could be something that's easy to diagnose and treat, like Vitamin D deficiency, or low iron.
She might have to give the day tri a miss. Its unfair to spoil your day if you've been looking forwards to it.

Yes, if no underlying conditions, obesity etc that would concern me. How far or for how long can she walk at a normal pace on the flat for? Is she just very sedentary?

She is slightly overweight for her age.

Very sedentary lifestyle since covid which I suspect is true cause. I think it's caught up with her.

Started feeling faint today and had a history of being prone to fainting since childhood.

I think your mum needs to have this looked at, she’s quite young fo be having mobility issues.

Not being able to walk for more than ten minutes is an infirmity and would usually indicate some health issue. What happens after ten minutes? Is your mum in pain? Breathless? Exhausted? Whichever, she can't do what she can't do, so while a GP visit would be a good idea, I think you're going to have to accept her limitations on the day our. Plan your day to take advantage of any transport at the place, taxis if needed, and pace yourself. Consider leaving her in a cafe while you have a look round at pace, then join her again for another potter. Or perhaps she'd consider a hired wheelchair? And yes, it's a big shock when you realise how bad they are. If you tend to see them mainly around the house you don't always realise the decline.

I've had some inkling of it because she walks at the same pace now as her parents did when ten years older.

But generally day to day she seems fine so I had no real idea. She's also vaguely active in her community but she could be sitting down a lot!

She Should see a GP and then if all ok get fit, that is not normal at all for 60 if no medical issues. My parents are a similar age and would think nothing of a 10 mile walk.

@5128gap she isn't breathless, just feeling tired mostly.

Obviously main issue here is I first need to raise it and she won't want to hear it

I also don't want to fall out on holiday

I'd definitely get her to see a GP if you can, my parents are 10 years older and can easily walk around for a whole day if they're going for a day trip and regularly go for walks that take a couple of hours without stopping. Early 60s seems very young for her to feel this way.

I hope you have managed to enjoy your trip anyway!

on the fitness note, I’d echo sending her to the GP, but if nothing underlying is found, encouraging her to move more. Anything from (chair?) yoga to swimming. It’ll offer loads of benefits as I’m sure you’re aware, but most of all at the moment can protect her independence and ability to enjoy life.

@Dramatic yeah I'm thinking about trips we took with my grandparents in their 70s and they weren't constantly sitting down.

Obviously my concern extends beyond the holiday.

I'm worried about her health and didn't expect to potentially have an elderly parent so soon

My older family members are like this and it is a very sedentary lifestyle and being very unfit. I have actually become a lot more active when I’ve seen how their mobility has declined in their early 60s, with the goal being long term strength rather than weight loss.

Please encourage her to see her gp and take from there , have a nice day out with lots of breaks for her .You'll both enjoy it more .
I'd give a lot for another day out with my mum.

Yes I agree get it checked by GP.

I am a bit younger but not much and very aware that I am quickly out of breath; I was a runner for years (not fast but long – 10k/HM) but now I cannot run even a couple of miles without stopping. GP told me my vit D and folic acid were low. I am also at least 2 stone overweight due to, well, eating too much and sedentary job.

But even I can walk about the place without needing to stop every 15 minutes. I could certainly manage a day trip out. So I think your mum's mobiloity is a concern.

Low iron, Vit B12 or Vit D can cause fatigue so a GP check should be the first port of call. But so does not using her muscles, is there any keep fit classes for seniors (or chair based) nearby or can she do some from YouTube at home to increase her stamina?

I have health conditions so if I'm out anywhere with family I get them to "park" me somewhere. If it's a lovely day and there's a bench I sit on that and people watch while they explore. If not I have a cup of tea in a cafe and they disappear for an hour. They take photos so I still feel part of the day out and that way I get to rest in between all the walking, so walk, rest, walk, rest, walk, rest. Would that be an option?

I know. I don't want to give her a hard time and ruin the trip. Especially as we don't do trips like this much.

But it is a cause for concern as I'd expect this from someone much older.

Agree with above about getting checked.

For the day trip, if it's to a city then a hop on/hop off tour bus can be a good way to see the main sites without lots of walking, and can have a rest on the bus between sites.

Please encourage her to see a GP. I don't want to alarm you but my aunt was the same at 61 after being fit in her 50s and the exhaustion was due to cancer / low iron. That's worse case scenario! But a 60 year old with no obvious health issues would usually be walking fine. I'm 55..

Something is definitely amiss, my parents are significantly older and would only need one or 2 breaks

We are also in a warm country which combined with walking may be part of it.

The thing is we walk about our own city and she never asks to sit down this much so it's quite odd. We did this as recently as two weeks ago without issue.

Interesting. I wonder if some anxiety is expressing itself physically with sore back, hips etc, or if it is the heat. If not breathless maybe not heart.. Or she could just be being difficult!

I am wondering if I should make the trip as comfortable as possible but bring up my concern at the end? Or after?

The way she sounded annoyed about the day trip was as though I was being unreasonable in thinking she could be out the house for six hours. Had to bite my tongue there.