Overboard reaction about cousin going home?

[Pred1cament]

DD’s (6) much older cousin came to stay at the weekend. DD idolises her and had a lovely time playing with her non stop. Her poor cousin was shattered by the time she left. Since she left DD has been absolutely distraught. Cried herself to sleep last night and has come out of school horribly grumpy and teary to the point that my parents are having a go at me about her being rude. Is this normal for a young child? It’s like she’s going through a break up! I’ve told her she’ll see her again and xmas and that she can’t be grumpy with people just because she’s sad but don’t know what else to do.

Poor soul. Is she usually quite deeply feeling?

Sometimes the overwhelming joy of getting all that positive attention from someone older who a child idolises can lead to a real crash. I wouldn’t let your parents get on at her for being grumpy. It may seem ridiculous or overblown from an adult perspective but to her it’s a very real and valid feeling.

I would acknowledge that she’s sad and finding it hard to miss her cousin. Let her chat about it if she wants to. Don’t dismiss or minimise. Her feelings will settle and she will move on.

Maybe next time make it clear to her cousin that she can take time out from the endless playing, for her own sake and your DD's. It will calm down the whole situation if it's not a matter of 'X is here and giving me her full attention every second' vs 'X is gone and I have nothing'.

She's probably grumpy today because she's tired? It sounds like quite an intense weekend!

Thanks all. I think the combination of first day back at school and her cousin going created one big anticlimax. She’s usually quite chilled but we’ve had a couple of occasions in the past of her becoming a bit obsessive. Touchwood she’s cheered up a lot. Thanks xx

I used to see my cousin every holiday like this, it was brilliant. Some of my happiest memories. I'm very level headed and not prone to tears etc but had quite big (for me) reactions every time we said goodbye. I think largely because of the tiredness as much as anything.

Just enjoy that she had a good time, and next time try build in a buffer of a day or two before back to school if you can.

These things can be a lot when you're six!