Friend asking for dog food 'compensation'

[dogbiscuitsareforlife]

What do you make of this.

One of my school mum friends, (I'll call her Mary) has a dog and we often bump into each other out for dog walks and walk along together. Not super close, but chatty and friendly

Last week Mary told me she had been let down by a dog sitter for a holiday. She couldn't find anyone so I offered to help. Our dogs get on well and I'm used to having more than one, although at the moment only have one. She asked how much I'd charge but I said no bother just provide his usual food and treats, which she did. Her dogs food is a superior top end brand to the food I give mine.

All was great whilst we had him, but when feeding, the dogs seemed to favour each others food and swapped between bowls. I didn't think too much of it but did mention it to one of the other mums at the school gates in a jokey way, saying my dog obviously preferred the more expensive brand to the supermarket stuff I provided. Whereas her dog really liked the cheaper stuff.

Mary has obviously been told and today asked me if I fed my dog her dogs food. I was a bit taken aback but explained the above and of course I did give her dog its own food but sometimes dogs want what the other dog has.

She was very cold and told me to compensate her for any tins I gave my dog as she wasn't there to provide for my animal! I'm totally bemused, I saved her £100's in dog sitting fees and although I'm not now going to charge her she must see she is totally unfair.

Or am I wrong and should I buy a pack of 4 tins to give her. My DH says ignore but I don't want bad feeling.

OP if there was a poll it would be overwhelmingly in favour of not buying the dog food.

Text Mary she must have made a mistake as surely she isn't trying to charge you for having done her a favour.
And / or feign very deliberate deafness and blindness around her forever more.

My goodness, I'm so fucked off on your behalf! I'd be so shaming this mum as well throwing the fucking tins at her!! Ungrateful twonk!

I am a petty fucker when crossed like this.

I'd present her with a fucking baggie, containing the two mouthfuls of food your dog ate, of her specific fancy brand dog food.

'Here's the mouthfuls of food my dog pinched from your dog whilst we dog sat at zero notice, FOR NOTHING... I am no longer surprised you struggle to find dog sitters! Have a lovely day!'

Don't give her anything. Don't cause a scene. She's being bonkers and sounds like someone has stirred (possibly inadvertently).

Message to say 'i hope you weren't serious about expecting payment for dog food. You've had X nights' free dog sitting when you were stuck. To be clear, my dog wasn't fed your dog's food, they helped themselves to each others'. You didn't mention any allergies so I had no intention of policing this. Very odd way of showing appreciation'.

This.

what an awful person Mary is!! I'm angry on your behalf and absolutely staggered at her cheek!!

No one will ask. You'll just end up pissed off that no one asked.

Of you are going to buy her the food have it back and say

'please don't ask me to look after your dog for free again. It's impossible to stop them sharing each others food and frankly you saved her so much money you really don't want to deal with being asked to replace her dog food'

loudly. So everyone can hear.

This!!
She’s an ar5e, and biting the hand that feeds her (dog)

FFS, not even a thank you gift? While demanding you buy her dog food?

She's an ultimate Cheeky Fucker User.

It doesn’t sound like you actually fed your dog her food but the dogs had a nose at each others. I don’t think you should compensate her at all. She is being incredibly rude.

I would though say to her that she obviously heard from the other mum that you had used her food but that was not the case.

I hope that you've messaged her back saying "Mary, I took your dog into my home, at short notice, FOR FREE, and you're demanding that I pay for food that the dogs switched between as they ate. I hope that you realise how bloody ungrateful and rude you are being. Don't bother asking for my help again."

This is extraordinary!

I would message her: “Mary has something been misinterpreted somehow? Your dog ate a bit of my dog’s food and my dog ate a bit of yours. To be clear, I Did Not feed my dog on your dog’s food and would never do such a thing. They simply seemed to be interested in sampling from the other bowl”

If Mary then pursues it, the next message should be: “I find this quite extraordinary. If it wasn’t for me stepping in to help last minute, you would have had to cancel your holiday. Plus I looked after your dog for free, thereby saving you £100’s. I have estimated that my dog ate £X of your food and your dog ate £x of mine. The difference is £x. If you really feel that it is worth damaging our friendship quibbling over this tiny amount then by all means send me your bank details. However I repeat that I did you an enormous favour so perhaps you might like to reflect on that “

And I would be telling everyone what a mad bitch this woman is.

Honestly, I wouldn't do any kind of pettiness, however tempting it might be. She is clearly a very cheeky, unappreciative and silly woman to make a deal of the dogs eating a bit of each others food when you'd done such a massive favour for her. As much as I'd like to give her a tin of your own dog food since her dog seemed to like it so much, I'd stick with ignoring her and if she raises the issue again ask if she was really asking for a few mouthfuls of dog food when you'd helped her out so much. I'd like to see what her reply to that would be!

Ignore...

If she mentions it again...

"Oh,..... you weren't actually joking?"

Yep this.

Don't be a doormat and give her the food, and don't bother trying anything passive aggressive as it sounds like she's a cheeky fucker and just won't care. Just don't give her the food and tell her why (and that that's the first and last time you look after her mutt).

@dogbiscuitsareforlife Do not give her any tins of food! Use the message from @CoraPirbright at 16.31 above. Giving her the food will only validate her opinion that you knowingly and deliberately let your dog eat her dog's dinner, and that is the story that will go around the school - regardless of whomever sees you hand the tins over. Don't do it, OP!

Well I, not sure how you owe anything as you looked after her dog and didn’t even get a thank you gift! But I’d buy four tins of cheap dog food, but as she doesn’t feed her dog it I’d suggest they go into a pet food bank. Hoe utterly pathetic, plus never dog-sit for her again!

this

combined with I only mentioned it to the other mums as someone asked how I was getting on with the dog so just told them in a casual haha way.

leads me to think the OP is one for involving others in the dramas of her life with others (of which i suspect there’s been quite a few!)

Someone's bound to ask so I can then tell them the reason.

you truly think others will even notice someone handing over a few tins of dog food to another mum?

I cannot believe you're going to buy this dog food for the CF!

I'd be saying "If we're going down the who owes who route, I'll just deduct the cost if the food from what you now owe me for dog sitting."

only for the drama of presenting it in front of other people

Some of these threads are started by reporters seeding a tabloid article.

They open a thread with an outlandish tale of cheeky-fuckery and let it develop. Three days later, they submit an article to a tabloid who will lap up the story of the mumsnet thread and its outlandish tale of cheeky-fuckery.

It sounds like you mix with a weird group of people. I think you should be careful about who you trust

I would give her the dog food and an invoice for your services. What an absolute dickhead. Also why did the person you joked with about this see it fit to pass on the info to her? Even if it was said in jest?

"Oh Hi Mary -by the way, about the tins of dog food -you'll have to take that up with your dog, I'm afraid! He's the one who abandoned his dinner and went head first onto my dog's bowl"

I'd give her the dog food back in a lasagne