To lie to avoid cat feeding

[Getmoveon14]

I have fed a friend's cat for 4 separate holidays this year. She has done one week for me. I have decided that I really don't want to have to feed her cat over Christmas. On Christmas Day my kids will want to focus on present opening and I don't want to go out after Christmas dinner (it's 1.5 miles away along an unlit road). I was wondering whether to tell her this but instead thought it would be better to just mention visiting my brother over Christmas. I am going to see him, but only on Boxing Day. So the friend asks what I'm doing for Christmas and I say 'going to my brother's'. So far not a complete lie, but then the friend offers to feed our cat (having previously said she may be away for Christmas). I was caught unawares and just told the blatant lie that another friend had agreed to do the cat feeding. I'm wondering if I should just have been honest and said I don't want to do cat feeding over Christmas.

You'rw not being unreasonable to want to avoid cat feeding, but you didn't have to lie to your friend about what you're doing at Christmas. Even if she did ask you to feed the cat, you could just say no.

Dont lie, dont feel like you have to explain things in detail, tell her in advance - Hi friend, I dont know what your Christmas plans are but I wont be available to feed the cat over Christmas so wanted to let you know in plenty of time if you are planning to go away so you can make other arrangements.

gosh had completely misread.

My advice stands though. Stop lying, people. Just learn to say "no, i can't do that" and leave it at that.

In this case: tell friend it's a kind offer, you haven't yet fixed plans but if you do go away you will be grateful for her help feeding your cat. It's really not rocket science.

Presumably these decorations will have been up for a while - the cat really doesn't know, or care, that it's Christmas day 🤣

I won't be able to.
I have other plans.

Say what ever makes you feel most comfortable and achieves the aim of not feeding the cat. What if you have a few drinks? It's Christmas Day! She needs to use a cattery x

You're into the realms of overthinking it now. Don't worry, none of us have the perfect thing come out of our mouths at all times. It's done, just crack on and enjoy your Christmas.

The timed feeders are great especially for the odd day away.

Say your plans keep changing and you won’t know for definite if you are or aren’t at your brothers for awhile - so best that you don’t make any plans together this year.

I also came on to say about the timed cat feeders - we have a one section one that you can set for up to 24 hours, and also one with 5 sections that you can set over 48 hours, so they're good for a whole weekend.

When we're away for longer than a weekend we leave the 24-hr one for the neighbours, so they come once a day (say in the morning) and set it for the other meal (evening)

You've changed your mind and have decided to stay at home and are looking forward to living in your PJs for the festive period while indulging in beverages that make you merry 😊

That covers off your cat not needing fed and protects you from friend changing their plans and expecting you to feed theirs.

I feel you need to be honest with your friend. Only because making excuses will mean she will keep asking you to feed the cat in the future and if you don't want to, you will have to keep thinking up excuses and lies. Lies usually always get found out and are hurtful BUT at the same time who could ever say to a friend ''Sorry, I simply don't want to to X ''. That would probably not go down well for anyone to hear. White lies are said to lessen the blow to the recipient and trying not to hurt their feelings.

Thanks all. This thread has helped me to realise that I need to set out clearly what I'm prepared to do - probably 2 weeks of feeding per year. I'll try to be honest in future!