Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To give up the friendship..

3 replies

sccept · 03/11/2024 09:42

I feel very sad this morning.
My 15 year old son has social anxiety disorder and asd. He has no friends and is by my side 24/7. He doesn't leave the house unless it's with me . It is heartbreaking.

He is vulnerable and has been the subject of low level bullying through the years. He retaliates physically when pushed too far.

My friends son baits, goads, irritates him and generally is a menace.
I've pulled him out of those social situations where that child is . He is a a horror of a child but I understand too that he must have trauma to be such an arsehole to my child. He has had plenty of trauma through his life.

I've spoken to my friend and she has the blinkers well and truly fixed. She believes every word from him but enables his behaviour with all other kids also. He can do no wrong. He gets his jollies from antagonising and irritating others and then plays victim once he's found out or in one case, hit back.

I'm torn. My life is utterly exhausting and frankly depressing with him but of course I'm trying to do everything to help and protect him.

I meet my friend regularly and my child is often with me and there are social events where the kids are there. It causes me no end of stress as I'm hyper vigilant , stressed and sad. I have no personal time away from him so these occasions are all I've got really but they're just too much now.

Do I leave the friendship behind?
We're already isolated enough due to his social anxiety and him being in my shadow 24/7.

OP posts:
Hoglet70 · 03/11/2024 10:25

She sounds a bit awful so I would probably try not to see her unless absolutely necessary.

Agix · 03/11/2024 10:31

You're not unreasonable to leave the friendship, but I'd tell her exactly why you're not going to be seeing her as much.

OriginalShutters · 03/11/2024 10:36

Of course you’re not unreasonable to end the friendship, but tell her exactly why you are doing it.

(Though it’s not clear to me how often her son can come into contact with yours — how many social occasions can there be where two 15 year old boys are present along with their mothers? And if your son doesn’t leave your side, that must limit the other kid’s chance to bully your DS, too?)

New posts on this thread. Refresh page