To think this reaction was odd?

[doodlediddle]

Background is we were a group of 8 friends from school and all still live relatively close. When we were 24 one friend left the group and she told me she felt sad every time we all hung out now and it wasn’t good for her mental health.

I haven’t spoken to her since then and I don’t live near her. This was 6 years ago. She doesn’t speak to anyone but 2 of them but I’ve never seen her until today.

We were in the same car park, I noticed her but I’m not sure she noticed me as she was looking through her bag, I had to walk by her and so I said “oi oi Alice” (not her real name), she turned to look and I smiled and she just looked deadpan and then pulled a mean face and just said “yeah. hi” and then carried on looking through her bag.

Not that weird. She acknowledged you but quite obviously didn't want to interact with you any further.

A bit weird but maybe she just doesn't like you.

Well if 6 years ago she told you that hanging out with your full group made her unhappy and you didn't ask why and proceeded to ditch your friend of nearly a decade with no effort made to make sure she was OK or see her alone...... then I'm guessing she doesn't feel very warmly towards you, with good reason!

She left the friendship group so it makes sense she didn't want to get into a conversation with you.

I wonder who the person was that made her most unhappy?

I think it's a bit odd that you went over and thought "oi oi <name>" was an appropriate greeting given the circumstance.

I probably wouldn't have gone with oi oi.

She was obviously upset enough about something to do with the group that she withdrew from it. maybe what you interpreted as a mean face was an upset face as she remembered whatever it was about the group that caused her to walk away.

oh.
this isn't a reverse is it?

I can't see why it was odd, she's made her position clear. Your greeting was a little odd if anything given the background, maybe a calmer/more formal 'hey' and a smile would have been better. But you aren't friends so I'm not sure what you expected

Yes op, your reaction was rather odd.

Oi oi indeed.

I must be the only one who doesn't think oi oi is wrong, maybe it's where I'm from and my age but that's a normal greeting. However, she must clearly dislike you, you must've done something to upset her whether you're aware of it or not

I've been in the friends position before and she was careful to answer you OP, so you won't be able to say she ignored you

Why didn't you keep in contact with her?

If the friendship group made her feel unhappy, and nobody followed up to check in with whether anyone could do anything for her and just let her go, I would say her reaction was very valid.
not sure where you are from but if someone greeted me with ‘oi oi’ i would personally take that as an unpleasant interaction myself. Perhaps a smile and nod at her would’ve been suffice.

Oi oi is strictly a greeting for someone you have a very jovial relationship with. Not someone who you haven't bothered with for 6 years. If you can't see that, I'd put money on you being one of the elements of why the group made her sad.

I have a group I left for similar reasons. 10 years later I bumped into one of them in a restaurant and she hugged me. It was so weird, i just froze. I think you got a very polite response considering your odd approach.

She clearly doesn't want interaction with you so just leave it their and move on I don't do groups chat's with people I used to know because it's always something going on

I can't hear the 'oi oi' as a greeting without thinking of Jacko I think it was from Gary Tank Commander!
Not a salubrious greeting!

Well no, I don't think it's weird at all. She said she was leaving the group as it was making her unhappy and affecting her MH. She acknowledged you and greeted you. You didn't ask her any questions to follow up on.

What else did you expect? (That's a straight question, not rhetorical).

Sounds like she has moved on and doesn't associate you with a particularly happy time.

I might greet friends with oi oi. But not someone I haven’t seen for 6 years. I would probably have just said hi how are you or something like that.
I get the impression she doesn’t like you much

Oi oi Name

What are you? A 14 year old boy?
What can anyone say to a greeting like that? It's downright rude

Did you actually try to engage with her?
Ask her how she was?

Honestly, if someone I had told I don’t want to hang with tried to get my attention by saying ‘oi oi Wednesday’ I would probably react like her as well.

What an odd thing to do.

It was the 'Oi oi'. What the fuck were you thinking?! That's not a nice way to start a conversation with anyone!

When she told you why she was leaving the group, did you speak to her about it? Did anyone else?

Why would you shout ‘oi, oi’ at somebody you haven’t spoken to for years and didn’t part on particularly good terms with? I’d have simply carried on walking, and perhaps smiled if she looked my way, that’s it.

She acknowledged u but has no wish for more than that.