Aibu to consider antidepressants for this?

[Namechangeforthis112]

You'd help me so much if could tell me your honest opinion. After primary infertility we now struggled with secondary infertility for years, and I am quite depressed about it instead of being happy with the one wonderful child I have. Each Month I think I'm over it and it's good the way it is and then a wave of despair swaps over me again. I keep counting how many kids a family has when I see them and think they're judging me for having one and not providing a sibling (though before secondary infertility I never even thought that way, in fact I gave it no thought how big/small someone's family is!) I feel so guilty and for some reason also shame. Would it be unreasonable to go the doctors and talk about medication for this as I'm unsure if this way of feeling is normal? I just can't seem to get over it and it's marring daily life so much.

First of all, I’m really sorry that you’re struggling with this. I have no advice on that, except that I couldn’t have a 2nd for other reasons and found that getting a pet really helped with my broodiness.

secondly, I don’t think ADs will help you in this situation, but talking therapy might. Or some other form of somatic or body work to find some tools to use to. work towards acceptance of the situation?

As previous poster said, perhaps see if some counselling sessions help.

Thanks both so much. I've started a talking therapy earlier this year but it didn't seem to help (or maybe me and the therapist just didn't click). I think I need a practical approach on how to navigate that.

However, if you aren't feeling able to function as you normally would, you can go on antidepressants for whatever reason. The cause of the sadness doesn't matter it is how much it is affecting you.

Perhaps try someone different. Lots use different approaches and of course you may connect more with someone else.

I get very depressed and angry leading up to my period. Sertraline has helped me massively with this.

You won’t get on with every therapist. It may be worth trying another.

Acceptance therapies might be useful too- yoga therapy can support this.

Hi op, I'm a therapist. Anti depressants are good for reducing the unwanted symptoms, poor sleep, struggling to concentrate, reduced motivation, feeling overly emotional, anxiety etc so if you feel you have those they should help. However I do feel some talking therapy is likely to be helpful too. You're going through multiple losses and a form of acceptance, that's going to be tough. Talking to a good therapist should be able you to work through that. Some therapists you will click with more and some are more experienced than others. Maybe try again? Good luck

Thanks so much for you reply! I'll search for a good therapist. I've also become overly anxious about my one child which is another thing I need to work on

Thanks for your message! Was your GP quite understanding? Do you have to take it daily or only in run up to period?

Gp was great. I did try taking it leading up but found I was more balanced if I took it all the time. I worked up to 100mg then back down to 50mg which keeps me nice and even

I'm sorry you are going through this, and it is affecting you deeply, going by your post. People don't really care that much about how many children you have; one or two, it doesn't really affect them. But it is affecting you, which is the crucial thing here, so I'd seek counselling on that score. Something so important to you as a person shouldn't be ignored. The possibility would be to take antidepressants coupled with therapy. I hope you feel better soon.

Thanks so much for your kind reply!