Can you dress too young for your age?

[Elliebobhobnob]

Can you dress too young for your age, and if so how would you define dressing too young?

It could be a man or woman.

I'm interested to know how someone would describe a person dressing too young.

I think you actually end up looking older when you ‘dress young’ So you know puffy things, flowery dresses, oversized sweatshirts look cute and adorable on teens /20s. Older women look a lot better when they stick to tailored items - shirts not puffy blouses. Plain fabrics or stripes not flowery. Smart jackets /coats not anoraks. I’ve realized this about myself. Doesn’t mean I always follow it though.
If you’ee older but super slim and toned you (ie no matronly bosom🙄) you can probably get away with a younger look. Oh yeah a proper bra is very important as you get older.

I understand this point but I'm unsure if it is just about your figure, of course you can be thin and have a figure that could fit anything you like but to me being the Mum of a teenage girl, it is more than about fitting in the clothes. My DD buys quite a bit of her wardrobe from Brandy Melville: lots of the clothes appear very teenage specific to me apart from maybe the sweatpants, some thick jumpers. Mostly, even if I was thin enough to fit into the one size I wouldn't shop there but I suppose that is because I wouldn't want to dress the same as my DD.

Genuinely, why do oversized sweatshirts look adorable on teens? All teens? Whether they're a size 2 or 18, tall, short, apple, athletic or hourglass? And why do older women look better in shirts? Again, is this regardless of the vast variation in their body shape, size and general appearance? What is the aspect that all women in a certain age group share that dictates whether a garment will look good on them?

TBF, that is a good point, I look so bad in shirts and I look fine in a mac.

Yes, I get this. Some brands and styles are so heavily adopted by a particular age demographic that they become a strong age signifier/uniform for that group and it can look 'unexpected' if a person from outside that group wears them. The same is true in reverse with teenagers typically shunning Sea Salt. I think the difference there is that people are looking at those styles and opting out because they're not part of the group that's adopted them as their uniform, which is different from a narrative that tells women certain clothes won't look right on them because their face and body aren't good enough anymore.

Invisible.

what you’re saying is - if you’re older, be invisible.

I think she's saying "you should share my prejudices"

If she doesn't want to wear that stuff because she doesn't like how she looks in it - fine.

Deciding that means that only certain groups should ever wear it (because that's what fits her personal taste) is wrong to the point of ridiculousness

Yes, I think that is absolutely the case and that is a very good explanation. I am mid 40s so hate all this 'invisible' talk at it's root it is just blatant sexism as far as I am concerned and my DD is good for my confidence as she will suggest stuff for me in BM, she obviously doesn't think I'm invisible.

My DH's thick, dark hair is starting to have streaks of grey and all his friends say it is alright for him as silver fox connotations, harder for them who are lighter haired. I think men overall are judged less though, I suppose traditionally, they were referred to as distinguished or similar. Maybe this isn't true anymore though.

@AncientBallerina

Older women look a lot better when they stick to tailored items - shirts not puffy blouses. Plain fabrics or stripes not flowery. Smart jackets /coats not anoraks. I’ve realized this about myself. Doesn’t mean I always follow it though.

In other words you’re saying older women look better when you can’t see them. Internalised misogyny at it’s finest.

@5128gap @HausofHolbein Thankyou! I know it can sound brutal written like that, but it really does help me not give a fuck 😆 As long as whatever I'm doing doesn't hurt anyone, then I will do what I want, because one day we'll be gone and we'll have wasted time being concerned about things that really don't matter. Things that held us back from really being who we are. Mostly the opinion of others

My teenage son told me I dress young for my age and he told dh that a pack of t-shirts was 'too young for him and that he should remember he's 40.

Your mistake is in taking anything a teenager says seriously.

I don't think it's insecurity, invisibility or misogyny any more. I do think dressing is inductive of who you think you are. My mum in her 80's wears jeans and nice tops. She's looked good in mini skirts in the 60's but why would she want to recreate that look 60 years on?

I agree people become comfortable and be alone less bothered by what they and others wear. Some people don't care and never have. The 90 year olds I know still get dressed everyday, wear nice clothes and brush their hair. They aren't judgy at all but making an effort with appearance is second nature.

Personally I think it’s about the quality of the garment.

I agree with this. Until I became a SAHM and moved locations I’d never dream of chilling out in jeans and hoodies, leggings, joggers. I lived and worked in a city, I dressed for work, on “casual” Fridays there was still a dress code, we dressed casually but smart casual for meetings and going out after work. I only owned dress jeans and only ever wore trainers walking or to the gym. All of my friends and colleagues wore similar to me.

Now I live out of casual clothes, but at 49 I’m at a point where I do feel many of my everyday clothes don’t really suit my age. I find myself putting different clothes on for the school run to what I’m wearing in the house.

I'm in my 60s and wear dungarees and t shirts. Don't give a flying fuck if I'm dressing my age and nor should anyone.
Life's too short not to wear what you like.

A dramatic arched eyebrow and 'Oh really?" to those comments. Cheeky little...

Quite. Those prescriptions sound terminally boring.
happily surveys racks of tie dye, paisley and whacky patterns

It's interesting though. Only going by literally my own opinion here. If I saw you in dungarees and a t shirt, I'd think good for you. I'd admire the fact you're wearing clothes that you like, even if they weren't to my taste.

Whereas if you were wearing something say tight, low cut etc. Plastered in make up and all that. Then I probably would judge.

If I question myself on why I hold those opinions, I would say it's probably because dungarees and t shirt say "I like these clothes and I don't give a fuck what people think" whereas anything that could be considered as trying to be "sexy" says i want to look younger than I am and/or I'm dressing for the male gaze.

I think for me that is the difference. But I repeat that is just my opinion, I wouldn't try and claim it's any kind of fact.

That's fair. I'd probably think the same about people [of any age] dressed ultra fashionably, latest hair and brow styles, big nails etc. Bit try- hard.

People in Goth or Steampunk or Loli, may belong to a fashion tribe too, but they look like they're having fun with clothes and I like that.

Oh me too. I took my daughter back to uni recently and we were coming out of a cafe and there was a lady heading in, around my age (50s). She was wearing a beautifully patterned dress (cant remember the exact pattern but it was very bold), matching earrings and a hat, gorgeous shoes, the whole works. And i said to her, I just want to say you look absolutely amazing. I couldn't have carried it off at all but it was exactly that. She was having fun with her clothes and it showed.

I always compliment someone who is absolutely rocking an outfit that really expresses a personality and their individual taste
Or just a bit of flair - otherwisw conservatively dressed older lady with gorgeous pastel pink dyed hair, the other day. Technically maybe mot dressing her age but she looked fab.

I think I'm a damn sight more lovely than anyone who suggests someone is "mutton dressed as lamb", so yes, I am lovely - thank you.

Another one who couldn't care less - and I'm 65 and often wear hoodies. If anyone ever tells me I look "smart" my instinct is to run inside and get changed. It's not that I don't dress nicely at times, but "smart" is not me, and the word makes me shudder. Happy to be thought of as sloppy in my hoodie.

I don't doubt it! 🙌🙌

I'm a firm believer in wearing what makes you feel comfortable and happy, and not what society and social media say you "should" wear.