To ask if you’d reduce or change your working hours for school pick ups?

[standaloneinthecity]

I’m a teacher, three days a week.

Two children, one nearly four (starts school September 25) and one fourteen months old.

This year has been really hard and I appreciate we are only a few weeks into it. My younger child’s sleep is poor which means my sleep is poor, I’m often going to work after only a few hours broken sleep which is affecting my performance, and I’m finding it really tough,

The school we like most for our older child doesn’t have the best wraparound. It only starts at 8 and ends at 415. If I continued with my current hours they couldn’t attend that school. I could reduce my hours further and work for two days a week but spread across three.

I have a private source of income and I worked full time until I had my first child four years ago.

What would you do?

If you can afford to work less, do it. Make life as easy and enjoyable as you can.

Reduce your hours. You don't need the extra money and they're only little once. You can increase later on again if you want. We have one life and it's pointless running yourself ragged trying to balance it all unless you enjoy it or have to.

Sounds like you want people to tell you it’s ok to do this. You don’t need permission - you do what works best for your family.

@Hazeby I’m not asking permission, just more thinking out loud I suppose. The big problem is if work was to change, if say we got a new headteacher and I was managed out, then replicating my work pattern would be difficult /‘impossible. Nine years is a long time.

Do you have a partner in all this? Can he/she do pick ups? What does their work look like if they go part time to accommodate?

No, I love working and sort wraparound care. Our after school club ends at 5 so not viable for us either.

Work less if you can afford it. Don't worry about the what if's. I'm sure you could increase your hours if you wanted to when the children are older and need less supervision.

Your husband should also adjust his hours so he can do some of the drop offs or pick ups.

My kids are a bit older (8&10) and I still work short days 3 days a week so I can pick them up. Not because our afters is crap and not because we don’t need the money but because I don’t want to miss out on them growing up. That is a good enough reason, if you can afford to do it.

Working less did slow down my career progression, especially when down to 3 days equivalent or less a week. But it’s picked back up now I am nearly full time again. And it was worth it.

We just can’t afford for DH to go part time as he earns more. I obviously wish that wasn’t the case but it is the reality.

He probably could do some. But it’s a reliability thing. Today for instance he is going to Belgium for four days (lucky sod) and so okay it is half term here but if that happened next year he would be able to take DC but not pick him up, and so we do need to have something reliable in place.

I went PT and don’t regret it for a second. If management changes, they can’t suddenly force you to leave when you’ve got continuous service. You can reconsider your options at the time - which is exactly what I did after Covid and moved to a job with more pay but longer hours (not teaching so I have flexibility in my working day for school run)

Assuming you can go back up to more hours fairly easily-

Once your child is in school you might be able to sort another class option such as a childcare swap with another family for after school (or find a childminder) and put your hours back up

Also your younger child's sleep will probably have improved a lot more hence she is 26 months rather than 14 so it won't be this hard

I wouldn't put my child in a school that did not not have wrap around. Or find a childminder that does before and after school for that school.

If you are both working you need reliable childcare in place. Then you don't need to chnage your hours.

I know @prescribingmum But realistically if a school want you to leave, then they can do that. And since I have two children two school years apart it’s a nine year commitment in a sense and it will also take me into my fifties which is a time you’re often vulnerable to being managed out. I shouldn’t fret about it, but it is an issue unfortunately.

There just aren’t childminders - I think we’re a bit too rural and spread out. Understandably most childminders will drop off and pick up to slightly more populated areas!

There are fairly big drawbacks to any other options. It’s a tricky one certainly.

I didn't reduce my hours as was already 3 days. But once DC started school I spread my hours over 4 days so I could do school pickup.
I really valued being at the school gate every day, the chat on the walk home, after school play dates at the park. It worked well for us

I think you're right to be concerned that a different Head might force a change in working pattern. Teaching management are often strangely blithe about the issues of teacher parents!

However, there are often other options than school wraparound: after school nanny (try Koru Kids website); ASC that picks up from the school; nanny share; your DH books one-off babysitter for any days/weeks he is on a business trip.

My DH does a job abroad intermittently and does his best to book the dates to coincide with school holidays or at least avoid my open evenings etc. He recognises that teaching's inflexible.

Depends on your area of course what's available re childcare, but try to avoid your DH making all the arrangements your responsibility. These are also his children.

I’ll probably do that once both are at school @WeNindow

@Phineyj I didn’t mean that a new head would change my working pattern. It’s more that if a new head (or HOD) joined then if your face doesn’t fit what was once a nice place to work isn’t and it’s very easy to be managed out.

They are his children but I’d be lying if I said that I don’t know that the responsibility for this lies with me, and you don’t need to tell me it shouldn’t be, but it is, and I do have to live my life and not the MN version - if that makes sense!

We chose a primary school mostly based on wraparound provision. I also had to make sure I finished a little earlier to pick up in time (luckily i could also start earlier so not really a reduction in hours). We needed the income from both of us, if you can afford to drop your hours to make it work then it's a good idea

Speaking as a teacher, you are absolutely right to act defensively! I don't think people realise how old fashioned school managements are.

Not many people know this: the UK teaching profession loses more teachers who are women in their 30s every year than the total number of male teachers. It's not a family (mum) friendly profession

Have a look at Private Nurserys, we had one near us that offered early morning breakfast club and an after school club for Primary aged children.

They could have breakfast and tea there and were transported to and from school, 7am - school start, school end -7pm, obviously a long day for those that need both but you paid for the time you needed. It was quite home away from home too, children could watch CBeebies in a TV room, do their homework, play with the toys or do arts and crafts activities, if free a worker would listen to younger ones read, as that age group didn't need constant supervision.

I do get it.

I am fortunate to have a DH who has done a lot of child schlepping over the years. The concept of planning for school holidays does rather fly over his head though. He's not perfect.

But I am out the other side and glad in retrospect that I didn't make too many career compromises. I've always lived in an urban area though which makes a big difference.

That’s a huge if to base this on though. The schools wrap around offer could change next year to be everything you need.

contrary to posts here it’s not that easy to be managed out. If you have a change of contract agreed a new head can’t just change it back again (but likewise neither can you).

re posters saying women leaving the profession - absolutely! Teachers need to imo start their flexible working requests with that rather than par time. Are there any after schools you could offer to keep your hours on an extended day, for example? We’re terrible as a profession for assuming flex = pt and heads aren’t good for it.

base it on what you know now and make your decision on current info

Personally I wouldn't want to cut my hours if you're only doing 3 days now. Your DH is expecting you to curtail your career for nine years? Fuck that! I bet he hasn't even asked about flexible working, he could compress hours and retain his salary, do term time working etc. You'll find a solution for business trips here and there.

Become a child minder.

Or, can you join an agency and to cover work instead.