To think I'm such a loser for not really wanting to go out and party much these days??

[Overthinker2022]

35, female, single, dog, cat, own my home and desperate to settle down. Am I the only one that feels guilty for not having the energy to be bothered to rush around getting ready on a Friday night after work for a night down the pub anymore .. and would rather curl up with a voddy instead these days?? Please tell me there are others out there too??

37 here, totally get this but just embrace being a massive loser. I drank and travelled through my twenties but can't be arsed now and much prefer the peace of a cozy night in. This evening I've done some crochet and had a herbal tea whilst cuddled up with my dog. Wild Friday nights can get in the sea!

What do you mean by ‘desperate to settle down’? As in to find a partner? Which can’t be done from your sofa…?

You're not "a loser", you're just a mature, civilised human. A night in with a good book is much more appealing than a night on the town. Embrace it!

Love this "witty" response.

Of course it can (dating apps)

You've simply matured out of the party lifestyle like most people do in their thirties. It's a good thing. Why do you feel bad about it?

It's normal. Especially when you've already done all the going out stuff a decade ago.

Definitely not a loser OP. I sometimes think my neighbours must think I’m really sad cos I can’t be bothered to go out and rarely invite people round. Then I realised my neighbours are exactly the same as me!
You're normal OP.

I got married late and now have young kids. When I was 35 I was very similar to you: owned my own place, loads of freedom and had a dog (no cat). If I could do it all again I would have a partner and kids but wouldn't get married. While I'm not unhappily married and, yes, it's nice to kind of have the option to hide behind being a married couple and all of the perceived, societal nonsense associated with it, I wouldn't do it again. Actually, I think there was a lady on here a few nights ago who posted that she was travelling for work at night and was posting from an overnight hotel and had bought something to eat like a KFC and was about to watch her favourite TV show. That made me laugh.
It's complete nonsense that you must settle down - you don't. Meet guys, enjoy yourself. Don't let society tell you anything. You're in a great place.

The "losers" are the ones clinging to partying (and getting pissed, I presume) like they're still teenagers, imo. You're an adult who's matured out of such shallow stuff - be pleased/relieved/proud of it!

I don't call it being a loser! Why do you call wanting to stay in being a loser? I call it normal. 🤣😃

I'm 58 and have always been like this. I have a DH who I knew from my student days in the 1980s and we have three grown up daughters.

If that's being a loser then bring it on! 🤣

I’m 28 male and completely agree nothing wrong at all

36 and been the same for years! Don't get me wrong I like to go out occasionally...key word occasionally not every weekend! tbh I don't know many of my colleagues/friends/siblings/cousins etc in my thirties that do go out that often, kids or not.

I would think someone your age was a bit of a loser if they were still obsessed with partying like a 21 year old tbh.