Would u want to know?

[PlodTheBod]

If your child (let's call him 'Fred' age 11) was regularly taken to a football/swimming type activity by his friends mum, who was also taking their own child, and Fred was misbehaving every week during training (eg. not listening, not joining in, disappearing to the toilet for ages, ignoring the coach), would you want the parent that takes him to training, to tell you?

What would you think when the parent told you? Would you blame the parent that takes him or think they were being a bit critical? or would u be glad they mentioned it? Would you rather they didn't say anything? K

What would you do? How would you react?

What should the parent that takes Fred do when Fred plays up in training? Leave it to the coach? Keep intervening? Do nothing? What would Fred's parents want you to do, do you think?

Thanks for any thoughts!

Yes I'd want to know. It's an awkward one but I'd say something like 'Listen, sorry now to be telling you this but Fred has been playing up a bit in training for a while now. Coach has spoken to him. You might be able to sort it out.' And leave it at that.

And maybe add 'Maybe he's not enjoying it anymore'? As it sounds like he has no interest tbh. Coach should probably have called parent at this stage.

Thanks @mikado1 I'm finding this whole thing v awkward!

I would want to know and would be embarrassed and Fred would get a big telling off. Frame it like you don't think he's enjoying it any more because he tends to XYZ

It definitely is but any reasonable parent would want to know. Once you're not criticising or judging the child I think it's fine to say it. Totally on them if they get snotty about it but I doubt it.

I’m guessing you’re the parent who takes Fred to this activity. It’s not your place to discipline him and neither should it be at all!

I’d say to the coach I’ll mention it to the parents and then do that - you can only do so much and the parents should already be happy with what you do. If they have issues they can take it up with the coach directly.

Yes I would say something like 'just to give you a heads up, the coach had to have a word with Fred a few times. I'm not really sure what was going on, maybe he wasn't listening, but might be worth having a word with Fred'.

Thanks all :)

Absofkinlutely

You're the facilitator of that visit, they are in your care, just as if they were at nursery, it's your job to inform parents of the happenings of the event.

Personally I might be seeing if the parents could take Fred for a bit and see if he settles down/ put it in their hands