Ex not paying towards dog insurance

[mumtoadhdasdboy]

I want to know if I'm being unreasonable for feeling this way or not.

My ex and I separated last year, we share a 10yo DS who spends 2 nights a week with his dad. My ex pays me maintenance for the care of my son. We also share a dog, who also goes with my son when he stays at my ex's house. My son adores the dog and he wants them to stay together hence the arrangement.

Before we separated I was paying for the dog, the insurance, the food, any dog-related bills etc. We had a shared income so it was easier financially. Since we separated, I carried on with these payments, it wasn't really discussed tbh, but the dog spends the majority of his time with me so I figured it was reasonable. The dog has to take pills everyday for a long term condition. I put these pills in on the days he goes to my ex's house for him.

But!!!! And here is the crunch.... I've just got the insurance renewal through for the dog and it's more than doubled (due to dog being older and due to the fact we made a claim last year) and I simply can't afford it anymore. I messaged ex to ask if he'd be happy to contribute towards it. I wasn't asking for half, I just asked for a contribution.

It was a flat no.

AIBU to be pissed off with him for not contributing?

Yes you are.

I don't think you are unreasonable for being annoyed with him as it would be nice if he contributed but I also don't really think he has an obligation to pay.

yep, unreasonable. sorry

It seems he's not bang into the concept of having 'half' a dog. It feels like the arrangement is more for your son's benefit. I can kind of see why he wouldn't want to start paying now if he was never expected to before. But if he can afford it he should just do the decent thing and cough up. I don't see that happening tbh. If he'd suddenly withdrawn payment then that would be out of order. You can try and reason with him. But ultimately someone has to pay.

Yes you are it’s your dog now

Going against the grain here but I don't think you're being unreasonable at all if you got the dog when you were both together. I've recently split with my ex and currently pay for 100% of the insurance and vet costs as I'm the higher earner, but if costs were to increase significantly I wouldn't hesitate to ask him to contribute. A dog is a responsibility like anything else and while legally he doesn't have to contribute a penny, morally I feel it's wrong of him not to do so.