To think this is a symptom of burnout

[scotpancakes]

For the past four years I have been solo parenting. Since my son was a year old. I have a day or two respite a week when he goes to his dad, but have been working full time since we split up and have no other support locally! I recently decided to change jobs (was working in stressful job in finance) and have taken a part time role three days a week. Having the extra time is incredible (I actually don't know how I managed to do so much with so little spare time)! However, now I have more spare time I have so little motivation. I have so much life admin to sort out and had thought I'd do a hobby or more exercise, but I find myself doing the cleaning and cooking and then relaxing! I feel really lazy! It's only been a couple of weeks in the new routine!

Hi @scotpancakes, yes it is surprising how long it takes to get over something.

That is fantastic you've got part time work now and lots of time to yourself. Just lean into and enjoy having a break.

Your energy levels will naturally pick back up again when they're ready.

I had a similar experience but over a much longer time frame.

I was a solo parent for about 9 years, lots of upheavals and difficulties along the way.

When I finally got everything sorted and in place I lost my job (but got redundancy) I thought great- I'm going to have a well-earned break and took 3 months off. Now looking back it actually took two years until my energy levels returned.

As you don't realise how much you're living on adrenaline at the time.

Just take it easy and enjoy going at your slower pace 😊

Relaxing is a perfectly good use of your time. It is productive. I don’t actually think it’s a sign of burnout at all. I think it’s quite normal, but seen as problematic because we live in such a capitalist, time management focused society where we must always be doing and producing. Rest is a worthwhile use of your time.

Don’t be so hard on yourself… just enjoy and live in the moment.

your doing an incredible job being a sole parent with minimal child care.

@yourmoneyoryourlife honestly it feels the first time in a long time I have space to do something! I think I've been running on adrenaline/fight or flight for the past few years! I have got lots I could be doing (sorting cupboards/putting things on Vinted/deep cleaning)! The guilt I feel for not working full time and having time to unwind is insane! Thanks for your lovely reply and understanding and sending big hug for nine years of solo parenting too xxx

@mindutopia @Guavafish1 again, thank you for your lovely and kind responses! As you say, I think it's modern society/social media etc makes you feel you should be scaling a mountain/cooking a Michelin star meal/decluttering/writing a book and learning a new language all at the same time in any free moment we have! Xxx thanks again for responding xxx

I am in a similar position, single parent having gone 0.8 in a bonkers industry.

My day off is the only thing keeping me sane and sustained. I listen to my body. Sometimes it wants to go for a run and be productive. Sometimes it wants to sit on the sofa watching crime dramas and eating crisps. I've decided that it's healthy to rest when resting is necessary.