To keep DD off school?

[Rhayader]

This is more of a wwyd.

DD has just spent 6 days in hospital. Being discharged on a Sunday afternoon meant that doctors were a bit thin on the ground and we didn’t actually get to speak to one but our discharge notes arrived. I asked about keeping her off school for an extra day and the nurse said to send her back whenever I felt she was ready. However, with the new rules about school attendance, I’m not sure if I can actually keep her off for any extra days without an explicit doctors note. Will I get a fine if I do this?

My GP is more or less unreachable at this point so I’m not sure that that is an option. I would be rolling the dice on getting through the online triage system.

Great idea.
I’d email it today and then ring first thing and explain that you’ve sent an email as proof and will she still require a doctors note.

It’s the week before half term and I’d be tempted to keep her off for it and start fresh after the holiday.

She would have missed 2 weeks of school though and so I would try and see what topics she’s missed and if she can do her homework or go on bbc bitesize to catch up.

The DfE guidance on school attendance can be found at https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/66bf300da44f1c4c23e5bd1b/Working_together_to_improve_school_attendance_-_August_2024.pdf

Section 365 is the section quoted above - "Schools are not expected to routinely request that parents provide medical evidence to support illness absences. Schools should only request reasonable medical evidence in cases where they need clarification to accurately record absence in the attendance register – i.e. making a decision that code I is the absence code that accurately describes the reason the pupil is not in school for the session in question. In the majority of cases a parent’s notification that their child is too ill to attend school will be that evidence and can be accepted without question or concern. Only where the school has genuine and reasonable doubt about the authenticity of the illness should medical evidence be requested to support the absence."

Many schools have created their own versions of this but go much further as they are judged on attendance. However - they should still follow the DfE rules! So unless they are saying that they have genuine and reasonable doubt about the illness, they cannot ask you to provide sick notes. Indeed, many GP surgeries will refuse to provide such information.

I would email school, tell them know that she will not be attending until she is well enough to manage, and that you expect all the absence relating to this hospital admission to be authorised as per the DfE guidance.

Regarding fines - do not let this worry you. If they do issue a fine (which they shouldn't) it would not be upheld by the courts as there is clear information that it is a genuine absence.

@Rhayader they know she was in hospital, absent with an I for illness next to it is no extra hassle. It's actually more work to go back and change it .Plenty of illnesses require a week at home , like chicken pox a bad bout of food poisoning or D&V etc.There's no doctor or hospital notes for that. What would parents do then?

I'm not saying go in all funs blazing, send your proof, answer any communication from the school but stay firm in your stance that DD was seriously ill, she's still recovering and that's that.

I’ve just checked the school website and the office opens at 8, so theoretically I could call them at 8 on the dot to confirm. The discharge notes actually have the exact time (weirdly including the seconds!) that she was discharged so they can see it was this afternoon.

I’m thinking of offering to come in during the day to speak to the welfare team. We have some medication that the school needs to keep permanently on-site and I need to check the staff have the correct training etc to administer it. The emailed last week to say that they would like to have some kind of meeting when she was back but I think it makes more sense if it’s done ahead of her return.

Just to add, we live very close to the school.

Is it not half term where you are?

After 6 days as an inpatient I would keep her off all week.

whenever ds has been in hospital I have generally kept him off school for as long as he was in. They need time to recover and being ill is physically and mentally exhausting.

if worried ask if staff can put work online for her to do between now and the end of half term IF she is feeling up to it.

No. I have no idea who thought it was a good idea to have the autumn half term as an 8 weeker!

School breaks up on Friday.

The school already put all the lessons online but we haven’t done anything all week obviously 😆

A day or 2 to have a few short walks and even practice holding a pen again would be really valuable. They are set for everything so it’s not as if she could even have a friend help with her heavy bag as they all go in different directions.

Keep her home until you are satisfied she’s well enough to go to school.
would you be going to work tomorrow morning if this was you?
if not then she shouldn’t be going to work either .

Just use the discharge letter to prove she was in hospital. Schools are putting ridiculous pressure in parents. If she was in for 6 days she obviously needed to be there.

You can't. We don't do them. Thats what the discharge letter is for. Although I did write a letter on headed note paper the other week, as discharge letter would be hours. And mum wouldn't go without it as she need it for school, the kid was 5!

Yes, ring in at 8, explain she is still not well/drained from her hospital stay and she will continue to be off. If you want/depending on the policy you can ring/email every morning to keep them updated. Say you will email them the discharge notes , or take them with you if they agree to a meeting. Don't let them keep the original, ask them to make a copy if they require one for her file.

Well I wouldn’t be sending my child in after just coming out of hospital, I don’t care what twatty rules the school might have about unauthorised absence. Just ignore them.

With your mention of medication for school it sounds like she has a new for her diagnosis to deal with to?

personally I would use this week to get things sorted with school for after half term and let her fully recover for the next half term.

It’s a bit complicated because we were at a satellite hospital of the main trust site (where our consultant is based) so she doesn’t officially have a diagnosis yet because we haven’t seen her! But yes - one almost certainly is coming next Thursday when we see the consultant.

The only paediatric consultant with this specialism at the “satellite” hospital was on holiday last week so it was all a bit of a shambles.

No, keep her off until she is ready. It is OK to keep children off school for medical reasons. She has been in hospital for 6 days so please let her rest and adjust at home before school

I wouldn’t send her in before the appointment then so you know what your both dealing with.

hope things go ok, make sure you look after yourself too x

Thanks. I’m also 20 weeks pregnant so it’s just been a totally crazy week.

This sort of thing really pisses me off! Who do the school think they are to pressure you into getting her to school. If people are going to take the puss with attendance, they will do so anyway.

You don't necessarily need a sick note (nothing like also putting unnecessary pressure on the nhs when it's at breaking point broke) you just need some sort of medical info. For me, a screenshot requesting a doctors appt and the relevant text message was enough. The discharge papers should be enough. As long as you come across as a rational parent when discussing with them, they seem fine.

My son was in hospital for 8 days this time last year and also had a lumbar puncture, he stayed off another 2 weeks when we got home. Partly because he was still in discomfort from the LP, partly because of my anxiety about sending him back when he had been so poorly to need all that time in hospital. Our school were very understanding though and to be honest I don't think they wanted the responsibility or risk of him being so poorly again. Hope your daughter is well whatever you decide 💗

Also remember if this is a long term health issue the school must make reasonable adjustments under the equality act.

First one I'd be requesting is authorised absences when's she's I'll without the need to keep proving she has a long term health condition.

Also things like missing PE of she doesn't feel well enough on the day - especially if it's after lunch and she may feel fine in the morning so not have a note.

Also a mentor she can contact if she needs some support physically or emotionally.

Access to a quiet room if she's unwell where she can access school work.

And as above a reminder to them of what the DfE actually says rather than their interpretation of it!

I remember when DS was first in hospital a nurse saying to me “don’t forget when they get home they are still ill, just not ill enough to be in hospital”

she said it in the respect of me needing to look after myself while he was in so I was well enough to look after him but it has stayed with me in respect to him being able to be back to “normal” too

This makes me weep, the child is unwell and you have enough to worry about never mind worrying what you say to school. I actually don’t think I could have coped schooling children in England with this carryon. You are the mother and you decide when she is fit and well to return. Imagine yourself getting out of hospital on a Sunday and going back to work on a Monday! Hope your child feels better soon x

Exactly ! how can any school or even a workplace think it's reasonable to expect someone especially a child who has been ill in hospital for a week come back into school /work a few hours after being discharged , i bet they wouldn't dare ask or expect this of a member of staff !
The one size fits all approach for school attendance gives me the absolute rage.