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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

in saying my 5 year old DD is too young for a Nintendo DS?

97 replies

MrsR99 · 24/04/2008 10:39

My 8 year old DS was given a DS lite for his birthday. Grandpa thought it looked so much fun he bought one for himself. Then he and grandma called from the airport on their way to go on holiday to tell my DH that they had bought him one too! My 5 year old DD has already asked for a DS but we told her she was too young (she can barely read) and could have one when she could read properly. When she finds out that not only her brother and grandpa, but also her daddy have all got them, she's going to go bananas. This is after her best friend got given a DS for her 5th birthday last week! I really have a problem with the idea of the whole family lined up on the sofa staring at that **ing screen, bashing at buttons and not talking to each other, and generally turning into zombies. Am I being mean?

OP posts:
duchesse · 24/04/2008 14:45

I have to say I'd never heard the word before in my life. A quick Google revealed why it's thought to be offensive though

mshadowsisfab · 24/04/2008 15:27

oh dear just seen this thread(and reported)

today my 16 old son smacked aboy in the face.
why you may ask. because the shit called his severely disabled sister a mong.

yurt1 · 24/04/2008 15:33

Your poor ds gets a lot of grief for having a sister with CP doesn't he?

sarah293 · 24/04/2008 16:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

SpookyMadMummy · 24/04/2008 16:52

Well, my Dd1, 6yo, has a V Tech Smile, thats all. Its been on maybe 3 times since she got it for the Christmas she turned 4 (her uncle bought it for her not Dh and I)
We don't have a Wii, or a PS2/PS3. I have a PSone, but I haven't even turned it on in 5 years.
I guess the point I am making is both my Dd's are happy enough without consoles.
IMO 5 years old is too young.

mshadowsisfab · 24/04/2008 16:58

not now yurt. he decks them so apart from this chav boy things are pretty ok now. most of his mates are 16 and know better.

SpookyMadMummy · 24/04/2008 16:59
mshadowsisfab · 24/04/2008 17:23
macdoodle · 24/04/2008 20:40

Oh god its the 21st CENTURY FGS not the bloody dark ages - if your child spends 3 hours a day on a compuer game then that is ENTIRELY the parents fault...
We have a old PS2 (rarely used), a Wii great fun for the WHOLE family stimulating and great exercise, my DD1 (age 6 and half) had had a nintendo ds since she was 5 and progressed from the 3+ games to her now favourite nintedogs and cats and brain training ...neither mind numbinf or fast moving - if anything they stimulate her imagination and her reading - she is very bright and an execellent reader and TBh sepnds most of her time running around with her friends - but the ds is good for half hour sit down or long journeys!!
Please people grow up and join us in the modern world and realise that this is the future now and IMHO you are disadvantaging your kids if you withold computer access of any sort....

fizzbuzz · 24/04/2008 21:19

Well said Macdoodle. Luddism is the word I believe.

Hasn't there just been a big report saying computer games are not evil terrible things?

Nintendogs is great and I think a 5 year old would love it tb

wannaBe · 24/04/2008 21:26

"Please people grow up and join us in the modern world and realise that this is the future now and IMHO you are disadvantaging your kids if you withold computer
access of any sort...."
there's a vast difference between allowing some access and letting them have something all of their own.

My ds is allowed to go on dh's computer, is allowed to go on dh's ds, and is allowed to watch television. But he will not be getting his own computer/television/games console any time soon. Partly because if he hs it all at 5 then what is he going to have as he gets older, and partly because 5 is far too young to have such expensive things IMO.

How are children ever supposed to learn the value of money if they are given such expensive things at such a young age?

bozza · 24/04/2008 21:33

If you think 5 is too young stick to your guns, maybe allowing her the odd session on DH's.

DS got a DS this Christmas at age 6.10. He is not allowed to play with it on school nights and only two half hour sessions on the DS/PS2 (which is officially DH's) per weekend/holiday day. This is relaxed if he is poorly and also if he has friends round they are allowed longer than half hour on a two player PS2 game. He spends far longer than this reading every single day of the year.

eddiejo · 24/04/2008 21:45

Just gave my DS 5 one for his birthday!! sorry. Was totally against at first but he absolutly loves it. I limit the time spent on it to 20 mins twice a day!! It's like a best behaviour bond!!!!!!!!!!!!

madmuggle · 24/04/2008 23:17

Why is limiting something considered depriving them of the chance to thrive in some people's eyes?

I see that not allowing my daughter to watch all the TV she wants, buying her her own computer and throwing a portable games console at her will be seen as tantamount to child abuse by some

Balls to it though. My children, my choice. Thus they can make do with the family television, the family computer and the landline should they wish in later life to make telephone calls. If anybody is idiotic enough to buy them the items I think they don't need they'll either be given back, returned to the store they were bought from or binned. My children, my choice

hoxtonchick · 24/04/2008 23:22

we are going to get ds one this xmas when he's almost 7. he's excited about it already. we have a wii that he plays on, but not loads (it is limited). he has a leapster at the moment which has been popular in the past but isn't at the moment.

Alambil · 25/04/2008 00:19

My DS has a gameboy advance thingy - he's played it once for 30 mins since November...

Having these things don't mean they take over a child's life; I let him play it sometimes, he puts it down and it magically goes on holiday (!) and he forgets about it. I remind him every so often and he will play it again - in the meantime, he totally forgets he has it.

He plays on my parents' Wii of a weekend (for about an hour or two) but that is the most solid play he has on a computer game.

Occasionally he'll play on my laptop too (for an hour or so over the weekend - a different weekend to the Wii playing by the way...)

Parents are parents and should parent their kids; kids don't need these things but they are nice toys. Keep them as toys - rotate them with the imaginitive stuff and the non-computer stuff and they won't take over. Kids need guidance and limits IMO

Alambil · 25/04/2008 00:22

oh I forgot, he's also getting a PS1 soon.

The GbA was given from my cousin - a very, very grateful DS thanks him every time he sees him. It was given last summer!

The PS1 is from Freecycle; DS has 2 games for it and hasn't played it yet but when we do have it, he'll only get VERY limited access to it. It is totally under my control.

bundle · 25/04/2008 01:16

dd1 (7) got a ds lite for christmas
dd2 (then 4) got a leapster

bboth seemm happy and don't actually play with them that much

obimomkanobi · 25/04/2008 07:11

I have a 4 year old who has a ds lite. He loves it and it has helped his word recognition and personally I think they help with fine motor control.

There is no text facility, but if you have a couple of ds's in the same house you can use a 'chat' mode.

My DS doesn't play with it every day, and doesn't play with it for hours on end, to the op - I'd let your father get him one it won't turn him into an anti social zombie.

FairyMum · 25/04/2008 07:14

My children don't have one. They have access to some pc games and that's enough. I am not crazy about my children spending time in front of a screens and at least make sure what they do play is either a learning game or something of some quality.

I don't understand why some posters seem to think you are depriving your child if they don't have a nintendo-thingie. An older child needs some access to a pc, but a 5 year-old should have better things to do that play these games.

Of course, it makes it easy for parents as it sort of "neutralises" your child and they just sit there completely in their own world for hours. I think it can be a bit of a babysitter.

mumto2daughters · 25/04/2008 08:16

My dd got one for xmas when she was 5, she doesn't play it that often, but it is great for long journeys.

mumto2daughters · 25/04/2008 08:16

My dd got one for xmas when she was 5, she doesn't play it that often, but it is great for long journeys.

arfishy · 25/04/2008 09:33

DD has access to one, mainly because we often do 24 hour flights back to the UK or 11 hour drives in the car to Queensland. She doesn't have her own, not least because the games aren't suitable for a 5 year old.

I don't see a problem with her having access to one though (I don't think I'd buy her one, they are an expensive toy), as long as it's under supervision in the same way as the tv and computer are.

Technology is nothing to be scared of and I get the impression that a lot of people think it is bad. Children need access to technology, it's the world they are growing up in.

obimomkanobi · 25/04/2008 11:16

Fairymum you said this:

"They have access to some pc games and that's enough. I am not crazy about my children spending time in front of a screens and at least make sure what they do play is either a learning game or something of some quality."

You know, not every activity/game for children has to educational!

Have you got a DS/ have you ever played some of the games - for example brain training?

You can pick up some great puzzle/suduko games too - which my kids love.

I agree with the poster above - technology isn't automatically 'bad' and it is part of the 'modern world' like it or not.

bluenosesaint · 25/04/2008 11:29

To OP

No, you are the parent and therefore you are NBU in saying that your child is too young for a Nintendo DS.

It does however make me laugh when people talk about their children turning into 'Zombies' - as a parent it is up to ME how often my children are allowed to play with thier ds's ...no danger of 'zombies' here!

Both my dd's (8 and 5) have one. Both are rarely played with (and actually thats usually thier choice, not mine).

I do however think that some children are too young (immature) to care for consoles - my dd2 is one of them. Therefore, I keep the console and the games and she asks me for it when she wants it.

JMO obviously, but i often wonder when parents lost control over these issues ...