Son, 5, adhd and video/computer games

[BrainLife]

My son is 5, 6 in a couple of weeks. Completely obsessed with video games. We don't have any. Literally none at all. He plays them occasionally at neighbours house. Mainly pac man and little big planet. He's been quite tearful because I don't let him have video games. Not for any other reason other than I think he might become even more obsessed. AIBU in thinking that it's not a good idea? Or am I worrying too much? I thought about just getting a computer with cd games that don't connect to Internet...

How would you feel about letting him have learning games rather than pac man style games?
For example Teach your monster have great apps for phonics, reading and numeracy
That way he gets to play,but it’s purposeful.

At some point you will have to give on this as it's a social thing too. A friend of mine has a son who is struggling because he can't play games (there's a physical reason) and he's feeling left out.

What I would say is when you do cross this bridge think about the console and the games you give him.

I would recommend leaning towards a Nintendo switch as the games you can get for it can be less instant gratification and more you have to work over a long period of time. It's less of a dopamine hit in that sense.

Things like Pokémon and animal crossing work a lot better than a lot of other games.

My Ds has adhd .. video games are the hardest for children with ADHD .. it gives constant source of stimulation and immediate reinforcement.

I would avoid them as long as you can or find educational games

Children with ADHD often use devices to regulate really well but also can become addicted and not put it down. I'm of the opinion that computer games have not always existed and therefore the ADHD brain can be equally regulated doing other things so are not as essential as some people make out - if you have other things that work for you now Id stick to them, 5 is still very young.

If you do decide to get him something the Switch has lots of games that are easy to pick up and put down, short and sweet family games. I think the issue often comes with those that are longer games where other people are relying on you.

Equally saying no is perfectly reasonable. Whether that's just for this year and a yea when he is 8/9 or no altogether.

Of course YANBU.
No 5 yr old needs video games.

YANBU, six is too young to expose the developing mind to addictive video games.

I personally think by making video games the forbidden glazed doughnut,🍩
you are making them even more irresistible and potentially addictive when he does get access to them.

Little Big Planet is a semi-educational game that teaches problem solving and has a sandbox where kids can learn the basics of game design by making their own levels.

I would not get a computer with cd games, it isn’t 1994. Just take the time to research fun & educational/skill games and then allow him a reasonable amount of time playing them. Video games can often be a much better use of screen time than watching Disney films or other rubbish CBeebies shows on TV.

He’s 5, I wouldn’t bother with computer games at that age. Maybe he could have an hour a day aged 8 or 9? My 13 year old has a couple of hours a day and only if he’s done all his jobs.

I honestly don't see the problem with a little Nintendo switch.. some lovely little games. Can always limit the time if it becomes obsessive.

Loved your "The Forbidden Glazed Doughnut" which sounds like an interesting irresistibly tempting yet off limits a classic "forbidden fruit" situation, but with sugar sweet coating. The same thing happened in the seventies, with the "Satanic Panic" over the tabletop board game Dungeons and Dragons, which had the "unexpected" outcome of many more kids wanting to play it.