hmm different priorities.
I only cook my husband's favourite meal and make his favourite cake and make sure the children have token presents for him (nowadays I only have to make sure the youngest does, the older ones don't need reminding). I don't do anything else except avoid being out on the evening of his birthday and don't buy him a present.
He buys me a present but doesn't make or buy a cake nor cook. Sometimes we go out on my birthday, sometimes we get a takeaway - I won't cook on my birthday but I used to order/ book and he'd pay - nowadays the teenage kids will sometimes do the booking or ordering.
But then we agreed that back when I wasn't earning much as I was mostly home with small children, and although we both find children's birthdays important and celebrate our children with party/ presents/ cake/ meal neither of us really get celebrating adult birthdays extravagantly.
If it's very important to you, you have to make sure he really understands this. If he understands and doesn't care the relationship might not be right for you - not because of anything intrinsic to birthday celebrations but because he should care about what's really upsetting/ important to you.
However if he doesn't care about birthday celebrations then making a big deal of his is for you, not for him.
It works both ways and youboth have to care about what's important to one another, not expect the other to be grateful for things you would want but they don't.
The "different love languages" idea is cheesy but does make sense here.
If you love red wine and he loves white wine, he should care enough to buy a bottle of red sometimes but you should care enough about him to buy him a bottle of white sometimes too, not expect him to agree red is just better and be grateful when you buy him a really expensive red... (metaphor obviously).
Is it your hill to die on?
It depends whether he cares about what makes you happy enough to prioritise that, and it depends whether this is really important and whether you've really clearly told him how important and central to feeling loved and appreciated and known this is to you, not just "we do this".