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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is it normal to allow your kids to sit in your vehicle beeping the horn?

26 replies

BigBoysDontCry · 17/10/2024 15:30

I live next to childminder, she's lovely, we've lived beside each other for about 15 years. I have no issues with her at all and whilst it can be a bit busy with vehicles dropping off and picking up, the vast majority of parents are considerate and everything is pretty good.

However, it always seems that there is one parent at some point across time (not always the same parent forever) that seems to think it's okay for their child to sit in their vehicle beeping their horn whilst the parent does handover. I appreciate I'm pretty noise intolerant but it drives me insane.

I had words with one parent a few years ago as it was relentless, every day for about 5 minutes. The guy wasn't best pleased even when I reminded him it was illegal and would he fancy me sitting outside his house doing it every day.

If it was the odd occasion it would be annoying but just part and parcel of living in an estate but we currently seem to have another serial offender. I mean, you just keep your child beside you while you are talking/doing handover don't you? or if they are small you at least strap them in the back?

Anyway, am I just a grumpy old boot and this is just all jolly fun and perfectly fine entertainment for DC while you pick them up?

And don't get me started on the folk that are too lazy to get out their car and knock on someone's door when picking them up and just sit outside and beep instead.

OP posts:
ThisHangryPinkBalonz · 17/10/2024 15:36

It's not normal and would drive me crazy too.

AlertCat · 17/10/2024 15:38

It’s illegal to sound the horn when it’s inappropriate, isn’t it? Yeah that’d annoy me too. Would she ask the parents to make sure they cause minimal disruption to her neighbours, like pubs and late-night places do? She may have shift workers in the street or people who can’t tolerate noise, and it’s just inconsiderate to let someone lean on the horn for minutes at a time.

MinervaMcGonagallsCat · 17/10/2024 15:41

Raise it with your childminder neighbour and ask her to address it with the parent

AutumnLeaves24 · 17/10/2024 15:42

I'd go & tell the child to stop it. I don't care how that fits into permissive snowflake parenting. If you don't want others telling your child off, sort them out yourself first. 🤷🏻‍♀️

BigBoysDontCry · 17/10/2024 15:44

Thanks, I'll give it a wee while in case it's just a child she has for the school holidays (they are on here at the moment) and then see what happens, she would be receptive and fine about me raising it but I wasn't sure if I'm just being overly sensitive.

OP posts:
JubilantTurquoiseGerbil · 17/10/2024 15:44

It is completely unreasonable.

BigBoysDontCry · 17/10/2024 15:45

AutumnLeaves24 · 17/10/2024 15:42

I'd go & tell the child to stop it. I don't care how that fits into permissive snowflake parenting. If you don't want others telling your child off, sort them out yourself first. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Yeah, I got as far as opening my front door to tell them to stop when the dad swiftly jumped into the car and shut the door and drove off so I left it.

I have no issue with pointing out poor behaviour and fully expected others to do the same when my DC were children.

OP posts:
JMSA · 17/10/2024 15:47

I would have gone fucking apeshit at my kids for this.
I will not tolerate antisocial behaviour.
I'm laidback in many regards, but absolutely not when it comes to inconveniencing others.

BigBoysDontCry · 17/10/2024 15:48

And yes it is illegal. The dad I spoke to basically asked what the police would do as his son was 4. I replied that they'd be dealing with him as the adult that was meant to be in control of the occupied vehicle. Didn't hear anything about it after that. Awkwardly he worked in the same place as me and I saw him a few times around the building afterwards lol.

OP posts:
Uselessatbeingaperson · 17/10/2024 15:48

I used to let mine sit in the front seat and "drive" and I remember doing it as a child too. Not very Mumsnet I know.

BobbyBiscuits · 17/10/2024 15:48

That's really out of order. You do not sound a horn for any reason unless it's a safety warning while driving.
Next time just go up to the kid and tell them to stop. It's disturbing and rude. Obviously not in an aggressive way.

Shityshitybangbang · 17/10/2024 15:48

That’s bloody rude and ignorant!

coxesorangepippin · 17/10/2024 15:48

Dangerous too....

BigBoysDontCry · 17/10/2024 15:50

I ca remember teaching mine to be very quiet coming home from activities when it started to get a bit later finishing as they got older and that it could be younger children's bedtimes. So they had to be quiet between getting out the car and into the house. It's not exactly hard is it?

OP posts:
Uselessatbeingaperson · 17/10/2024 15:50

Not hard but kids are kids and they're allowed some fun in their lives.

JMSA · 17/10/2024 15:51

Uselessatbeingaperson · 17/10/2024 15:48

I used to let mine sit in the front seat and "drive" and I remember doing it as a child too. Not very Mumsnet I know.

I did this with my dad, as did every 70s/80s kid on the planet, I'd imagine Grin
Brilliant fun.

Dramatic · 17/10/2024 15:52

Uselessatbeingaperson · 17/10/2024 15:48

I used to let mine sit in the front seat and "drive" and I remember doing it as a child too. Not very Mumsnet I know.

Repeatedly beeping the horn in a residential street? Really? I've let mine "drive" but the horn is off limits

BigBoysDontCry · 17/10/2024 15:52

They are allowed fun but surely not at the expense of others (and it's illegal)? If he enjoys beeping the horn, perhaps he can do it outside his own house? Or I could pop round about 8pm and give it a good go for a laugh.

OP posts:
Uselessatbeingaperson · 17/10/2024 15:52

Dramatic · 17/10/2024 15:52

Repeatedly beeping the horn in a residential street? Really? I've let mine "drive" but the horn is off limits

Not repeatedly but a beep or two, yes.

WhereYouLeftIt · 17/10/2024 16:26

BigBoysDontCry · 17/10/2024 15:45

Yeah, I got as far as opening my front door to tell them to stop when the dad swiftly jumped into the car and shut the door and drove off so I left it.

I have no issue with pointing out poor behaviour and fully expected others to do the same when my DC were children.

Be quicker next time!

Ikilledtheorchidagain · 17/10/2024 16:33

JMSA · 17/10/2024 15:51

I did this with my dad, as did every 70s/80s kid on the planet, I'd imagine Grin
Brilliant fun.

Who remembers changing the gears?
Back to the original post: I would never let my kids beep like that. One of the neighbour's kids does it sometimes. Drives me to distraction.

AutumnLeaves24 · 17/10/2024 16:46

BigBoysDontCry · 17/10/2024 15:45

Yeah, I got as far as opening my front door to tell them to stop when the dad swiftly jumped into the car and shut the door and drove off so I left it.

I have no issue with pointing out poor behaviour and fully expected others to do the same when my DC were children.

👍🏻👍🏻

im sure he'll be there to puss you off next week!!

yeaitsmeagain · 17/10/2024 17:02

JMSA · 17/10/2024 15:51

I did this with my dad, as did every 70s/80s kid on the planet, I'd imagine Grin
Brilliant fun.

Reminds me of the plane that crashed because the pilot let his kids take over flying.

itsgettingweird · 17/10/2024 17:03

No it's normal.

And yes - it would drive me nuts!

FasterMichelin · 17/10/2024 17:07

YANBU. One of my former neighbours was a childminder and her parents, in a huge range rover, would always leave her engine running whilst dropping off and picking up. Its so awful for the environment and I was tempted to say something but didn't want to annoy the neighbour.