when can I draw the line at dh working every last hr God sends

[oydal]

It's probably been about 6 months now since he's been rediculously (sp?) busy at work. He comes home has dinner, gets the laptop out and starts working till midnight probably 4 nights in the week and then works all weekend unless there is something we have to go to ...or of course a lads night out ...or football.

He seems to think that at least he's at home working rather than working late at work. I'm getting really fed up and want to have our nights and weekends back together!

I try not to get on his back too much because I know he's under alot of pressure but sometimes I feel like I have no adult company, only my dc all day and than a dh who comes home and is glued to a computer screen.
I'm a full time Mum, so when the kids are tucked up in bed I crave some adult conversation.

OK, so he sits in the lounge with me at night when he's working but any reply I usually get is "huh" or What?".

There's not really much I can do, is there?
I really don't want to start nagging, he really is under alot of pressure.

Sorry -just needed to rant a bit!!

Got a similar DH. It used to drive me nuts when the LOs were small, but I came to realise that's what pays the bills and keeps us with a roof over our heads.

I found it easier to get involved, offer to type up reports and/or do his proof-reading, feed him coffee (or beer if its friday night and you want him to wind down).

You have my sympathy though.

Oh.. I just remembered.. I occasionally used to say 'seeing as you are here, you can watch the LOs while I just nip out for an hour or two'. Then bugger off swimming or meet a mate for a drink, quick before he looks up from the laptop.

I work in an office where lots of the men put in these sorts of hours and TBH they do it from choice

I know for a fact that they tell their wives they have to do it, but it's simply not true. The world really won't end if that report waits till tomorrow or even next week.

Maybe they get some extra career brownie points, but not as many as they think, because if they always put in these hours, it's just expected. I on the other hand, can get major brownie points by agreeing to bend my 5pm sharp rule, because someone needs help with something or we're working on a particularly important deal/project

The fact is, if they want to reduce the hours they work they can. Most don't want to, some are avoiding going home, others are too macho to admit they need a break or to see their wives sometimes.

oh, I know loads of men who would rather work than spend time with their family