Stupid argument with DH. AIBU to not want to be the bigger person just yet?

[choochooooo1]

DH and I ended up having a very random conversation at the weekend that led to a bit of an argument.

He said something, I felt, that was quite derogatory toward one of my parents and we had a bit of a spat over it.

Basically my dad has worked in a job that I believe most people see as quite a tough job for his whole life since being 18, retiring last year. The job included constant shifts, long hours, physically and mentally draining and also caused an injury that he will now suffer with for life (part of the reason for retiring being on medical grounds. He was given a sum due to the injury at work).

Anyway back to DH and I. We were talking about difficult jobs, I said I felt my dad's job must have been pretty hard and for some reason DH just went off on one. Saying it's not at all, anyone with common sense would disagree that it's a hard job, I was ridiculous for saying it could be hard, it was easy, dad is just lucky, he's had it easy and so on etc etc.. I kept saying we can just agree to disagree because I do think it's hard, ive witnessed growing up with a parent doing said job and i feel its not easy but on and on he kept going. It was really quite tedious how stupid it was and the fact he wouldn't just accept that I disagreed with him made him come across so insufferable. He kept saying "we can disagree but you're wrong".

It was so bloody stupid and pointless the whole thing but the way H was going on it really started to piss me off (the fact he wouldn't just let it go).

Anyway in the end I said okay then if I'm so terribly wrong and you are right and there is no room for disagreement you won't mind me telling my parents your opinion. So I did, or so he thinks. I haven't actually told my dad anything at all but DH thinks I have.

He is now in a massive sulk because he actually really likes my dad and cares a lot what he thinks.

AIBU to let this go on a little longer because of how much of a twat he was being for no reason? The whole time I was trying to diffuse, let's just agree to disagree, it's silly to argue over etc.. but he would not let it go.

There must be context. Do you have a habit of comparing them, so when DH has had a hard day do you ever say "it could be worse, you could be a prison officer/bin man/whatever your dad did"?

Do you have your dad on a pedestal and it hits a nerve for him. Maybe DH feels he worked really hard for qualifications and you don't really care, don't see it as any different (better?) than an unskilled job, even if day-to-day it's hard.

It's probably just a load of macho nonsense from DH, but worth thinking where it's coming from, assuming he is nice in every other way.

This sounds like classic willy waving! Dh obviously has a narrative where he has the hardest job ever and should be admired for it and then you come along and say that your father had a hard job, hence the explosion! I've no idea whether he admires your father or not but I'm sure he doesn't want his fil to know what a dick he is!

Intrigued to know what the job was.