Co parent won’t authorise flu jab for DS

[wtfisthisplease]

DS (5) has gone into school today and flu jabs / nasal sprays were planned and booked in weeks ago for today. I consented like I did last year with no problems. His dad was on the school emails but never bothers to reply or do anything with them. Today when I took DS into class, the teacher said my son’s dad had called the school and said he didn’t want DS to have the jab. Wtf? He never gets involved in any child ‘admin’ (doctors, dentist, school trips, parties etc). I genuinely believe getting the flu jab will be in my son’s best interest (no arguments on your beliefs on the jab please!). I also have a SENCO meeting with the school later today to discuss DS ADHD diagnosis which Ex cba to go to, neither will he attend parents evening Thursday, but the fact he can have such a sway on this has pissed me off a bit. I know he’s still 50% of DS parents but why should he be able to pick and choose. Do I just accept that neither of my kids can have the jab now?

Pharmacy won’t do it, and the GP surgery might not either.

We’re not commissioned to do school
age children’s flu vaccs in
primary care.

Yes however, "he has actioned his right to withdraw consent" but you haven't and you believe it to be in the child's best interest for him to have the flu spray.
Bloody idiot!
Not sure what the law says though?

We missed our school flu nasal spray last year as there were teething problems with emails but when I spoke to school office about it they sent me a link to book it at a GP for free, presumably for those who missed it on the day for whatever reason. So she did get her flu vax under the scheme.

Just adding this info for balance in case it helps OP or anyone else who misses out at school. It's worth asking (covertly in OP's case perhaps) if there's an option to be referred.

Just wondering now actually whether it would be a good idea to open up the conversation with dad and calmly and politely ask what it is he is opposed to and try to ascertain to what extent he won't consent to medical treatment/drugs for DS. If he has gone hell for leather on no jabs or medication unless at deaths door then you may need to go to court.
My son (now14) takes prescribed meds for tourettes and for ADHD which both he and I believe he needs (makes a huge difference to his day and school life and work). His father refused consent for meds previously but I didn't have to take him to court because at around age 12 Dr gave him 'Gillick Competence' because he understood that he needed them and in his best medical interest and that meant no parent could refuse the meds.
Just a thought for now
(obvs calmly and politely might be difficult at the moment!)

My niece died of flu at 21 (she had underlying factors but was otherwise a healthy, fit young woman). I would just go to the GP or health clinic and get it done. I've never been asked for my husband's consent when I've taken the kids. I'd rather be on the naughty step than risk my child's health.

It's not a jab, it's a nasal spray. Your 5 year old can therefore say with confidence that he hasn't had the jab.

That can't be right DS has often had his done at the GP'S. But then he does have asthma and I get his done either in school or at the doctors. Who ever gets to me first with giving them out.

This. Once they were school age we could only get it via school.

You can get it done in Boots or Superdrug. Bollocks to him.
Did your kids have their baby Imms?

At risk children, eg with asthma may be able to get them done at the GPs depending on local commissioning. But not all children ☺️

I have no practical help or advice. Just coming on to say I feel your pain. He's being a complete wanker. I bet this isn't the only time he's done something so ridiculous just to be petty.

She doesn't though. That's how PR works. Both parents have to agree in the absence of a court order.

Because no always overrides yes in matters of consent!

The law says they both have to consent.

Why do the OPS wishes override his concerns about the jab? I'm not anti vax but I wouldn't necessarily want my 5 year old having it every year. Co-parenting is about shared decisions. Sounds like the OP believes he has no say in their son's care.

@LakelandDreams oh come on. The jab is perfectly safe.

I think the school have got this wrong. Either parent can unilaterally consent to jabs. Thats why only one needs to complete the forms surely?

Also, yes take him to the pharmacist and get it done if the school won’t.

Edit - I’ve looked this up on line and it looks like I’m wrong but it seems bonkers to me. A parent can always consent to medical procedures for a child.

Either parent can sign a consent form yes, but if someone with PR registers that they don't consent to the jab then the school/nurse absolutely cannot administer it.

A parent can consent, but the other parent can object.

I'd speak to your GP and ask them to state that they think the vaccine is in your child's best interests and then I'd take him to court. That will likely stop him pulling any stunts like that again.

If he had genuine concerns you'd have heard about it, not found out through the school.