To be freaking out about emergency C-sections - help! Will a planned c section might be best?

[notaurewhatusername]

I swear, every time I turn around, another friend is telling me about their emergency C-section. It's like everyone I know who's a first-time mom ends up in the operating room!

I'm starting to wonder if I should just ask for a planned C-section from the get-go (I have a family member who is a midwife so appreciate no guarantees unless I go private ). The thought of things going sideways during labor and ending up with an emergency procedure is freaking me out. At least with a planned C-section, everyone's calm and prepared, right?

But then again, I know C-sections come with their own set of risks. Ugh, why is this so complicated?

At the very least if no c section I know I will need an epidural, I just don't want extreme pain and trauma if I can somewhat try to avoid it. Again, I appreciate no guarantees but I'm willing to try.

I'd love to hear from you all. Did any of you end up with an emergency C-section as a first-time mom? If you've had both planned and emergency C-sections, how different were they?

I’ve done it both ways. Initial recovery is slower after cs, but I’ve had fewer longer term problems than my friends who had 2 vaginal births.

I’ve not got much of an overhang and I’m 2 stone overweight.

I had a second degree tear with my first, but healed fine.

And yes, the terminology is not helpful. Mine is classed as an emergency, but I was advised in a very calm way and genuine emergencies went ahead of me. I was 14 days over and at the monitoring I turned on to my side and baby’s heartbeat dropped. Happened twice. Turns out he had the cord round his neck, so I had a calm cs rather than a possible very scary natural delivery. I made the right call.

I do agree with pp that it’s tough in hospital once the catheter is out and you’re expected to get on with it. The second night was tough and it would have been better if I’d gone home as DH could have helped.

Just go for the Cs. I've had two. First was planned (as in a couple of days notice for slow growth) second was emergency after failure to progress in labour. I'd begged to have elective Cs the second time round but was told I had to do vaginal. Ended up with emergency Cs anyway. Recovery from both was no problem and far easier than others who'd had natural birth.

Giving birth isn't a competition.

Go with the method you prefer.

I went with a c section in the end she was breach anyway but I elected.

Reasons? I don't want the long term complications you see in older women with urinal issues etc

I met eight very good “mum” friends after DC1 was born and not one of them had an emergency c-section. In my other friendships, only one person I know has had an emergency c-section and that is out of double figures of friends! So I really wouldn’t worry about it OP.

That isn’t true. Epidurals do not increase your risk of having a caesarean.

I think your best talking to your medical team about your specific case and worries and then take it from there.

When I spoke to the anethatist I decided an epidural wasn’t for me as the risks outweighed the benefits (for me personally). After DS was born I was told that if I had had an epidural because of how things progressed I would have been more likely to have ended up as an emergency c section.

OP for some reason, people love telling horror stories about their labour to pregnant first time mums. I hate it, it’s totally unnecessary.

For balance, I had my first (and only) with pretty much no pain relief until literally right before I started pushing. I mean, it’s not pleasant but it is do-able. It’s different for everyone but I’ve had worse toothache to be honest!
I didn’t need any stitches, either.

It is totally up to you what you choose to do. It’s your body and your baby. But if I were you, I would have a birthing plan that states you want max pain relief and go from there.

I've had an unplanned C section, vaginal delivery, proper emergency C section with a very premature baby (GA) and finally, an elective C section.

Honestly, wouldn't recommend the 3rd option, though all was eventually well! But you have the best cup of tea ever after a vaginal delivery and you definitely recover more quickly. It was an amazing experience actually.

I had a natural birth but pretty quickly opted for an epidural as I was bloody knackered (physically and emotionally) from a looooong stay in hospital for my induction and it was bloody amazing!

I slept most of the night and l woke up at 4 to start pushing even the midwife was surprised id dilated so quickly I think it was finally getting some rest!

I'm a massive planning freak and really just had to surrender to that whatever would happen would just happen in order for our baby to get here safely! As soon as I foudn out I needed an induction we decided to run up the birth plan ideas and go with the flow hard at the time but it made me so less anxious!!

I came here to say this, yes: as a midwife said to me, it's not an emergency in the sense that everybody is rushing because it's unexpected. They'd be monitoring you and discussing the different options with you before deciding on the procedure. Emergency here means it was not scheduled but doctors are always prepared for c-sections: it's a very common procedure.

@Errors "OP for some reason, people love telling horror stories about their labour to pregnant first time mums. I hate it, it’s totally unnecessary."

Oh, and absolutely this: it's awful. Protect yourself, OP: when someone starts with their "war stories", change the subject, fake a call, excuse yourself, cover your ears... RUN!

OP, I've had two CS - one emergency due to pre-eclampsia and one planned. Even the one that was physically more difficult to recover from (ironically the planned one - although I did have a 3 year old at that point) wasn't that bad. Certainly not as dramatically horrific as some would have you believe here.

If you go planned, I recommend taking arnica tablets in the run up to help with post op bruising, start walking around gently as soon as they say you can (next day both times here) and take your prescribed painkillers. The stiffness first thing when you wake up was the worst bit for me. And even that improves really quickly if you follow advice and take care of yourself.

And stock up on peppermint tea, as I ended up with quite painful trapped wind - randomly in my shoulder - the second time. Peppermint drops in warm water sorted it out.

I’ve had both (not by choice) and both were fine.

Why on earth would you elect to have a potentially unneeded major surgery just because you are hearing about lots of people going that way?

Natural birth while painful you are up and about pretty soon afterwards (all going well). C section (planned or not) is considered MAJOR ABDOMINAL SURGERY. Why on earth would you want to put yourself through major surgery with more chance or risks, being in bed longer, not being able to pick up anything or bend over (including your baby!), not be able to drive for six weeks, scar that needs to be checked and heal properly etc.

Having a baby and then having to deal with major surgery isn’t optimal if you can avoid.

i would really have liked to have had a natural birth both times and would suggest opting for an unneeded surgery isn’t ideal. Plus you are in hospital longer.

I seriously think you need to reconsider or at least have ‘better’ reasons.

Firstly you can request an elective c section on the NHS - you don’t have to go private for it. NICE guidelines state that if there is a “maternal request” then your hospital / docs are obliged to give that to you. I’d also suggest requesting a consultant does this as you’ll have a better recovery from it due to their experience.

My experience was that I had an elective section booked as it happens for a medical reason (placenta previa) but had asked for one anyway for various reasons.

As it happens I ended up with an emergency c section as DS decided to come early and there it was thought that I was having a placental abruption, so they whisked him out 6 weeks early.

I don’t have anything to compare it to but I had an amazing team who looked after us all amazingly well and it was calm throughout the entire process.

I’d definitely recommend a section; less chance of being harmed than from a vaginal birth too.

I've had all kinds of birth and I found the elective c-section the hardest and most painful.

@notaurewhatusername

“applestrudels · Yesterday 21:18

I would massively, massively recommend doing a hypnobirthing course. The name makes it sound really woo but it's really all about feeling calm and relaxed during labour and not panicking. Some people (including a friend of mine) said it made her birth virtually painless. Personally I didn't find it made the birth painless, but it did make the pain very manageable. You can still get an epidural if you're doing hypnobirthing, because, as I said the main benefit of the hypnobirthing as far as I'm concerned is to make you feel calm and relaxed and not worried, so even if you end up having interventions, it's not a scary experience.
That's not really what you asked, but I just thought you would benefit from it as you sound anxious (which I was, massively, before my first child's birth, which ended up being a lovely experience despite ending with an episiotomy and ventouse, it was all lovely and calm and nice).”

Another seconding hypnobirthing. It teaches you very useful deep relaxation techniques. Labour still hurt (my first was a back labour) but it wasn’t agony and I didn’t feel like I was dying. I felt very relaxed and even dosed off between contractions. It definitely helped a lot. I also used some pain relief techniques including being in a warm bath at home and then gas and air and the birthing pool in the hospital. The pain was intense at times but manageable. Second time was much quicker and I used a Tens machine.

Also as some other PPs have noted - an emergency Caesarean is any unplanned Caesarean. It doesn’t mean there’s an actual emergency.

I had 2 vaginal births and would also highly recommend hypnobirthing, I found the birth education side so much better than NCT.. I knew what was happening, stayed calm and my births were very straightforward and fast. I didn't have pain relief (only due to the speed) but found it completely manageable when I breathed properly as the hypnobirthing taught - contractions were hugely less manageable and more painful when I didn't breathe through them.

Just be very aware of the risk of ending up with an instrumental delivery if you go for a vaginal birth. I think it’s 1 in 3 first time vaginal births in the UK.

The horrors of it are not well publicised, but it’s not uncommon in the UK (most countries with functioning healthcare systems have outlawed forceps or only use them in the most dire of emergencies).

C-section recovery is so so so much easier than recovery from a forceps delivery. All the women I know who had csections were more or less fine by 6 weeks and absolutely 100% fine by 6 months at the very latest. I don’t know anyone who had ever recovered front a forceps delivery. You will be left severely damaged for life. The baby will also be injured (this is a guarantee as the forceps cut their heads and faces), many are severely injured and left with lifelong problems. It also has the same effect on breastfeeding as a C-section as the baby will be unwell and in agony for its first week of life at least.

Umm, so you can avoid potentially being in agony for 24+ hours and your vagina/vulva being torn open, and having stitches in the most sensitive parts of you. So you can avoid the risk of metal instruments inside your to pull out your baby. So you can avoid going through so that you still need the surgery. So you can avoid the increased risk of incontinence and faecal incontinence...

All risks that I wasn't willing to take.

I wasn't stuck in bed, I was out and about weirdly, pain free. The restriction on driving is a historical myth, and the not lifting anything heavier than your baby is standard advice after ALL births birth in many countries. The stay in hospital in the UK is on average only half a day longer than a vaginal birth.

Yes, for some women it's very painful (just like vaginal birth) and some women have complications which delay recovery (just like vaginal birth) but this idea that we are all tucked up in bed in agony whilst those with vaginal birth are fine is a total myth. I was happily going shopping on day 3, entertaining guests at home for a bbq on day 6, down slides in soft play in week 2. I was the only planned section in my NCT and I had the quickest recovery.

It's a lottery either way. I'm sorry that you didn't enjoy yours, but you talk about your experience as if it's inevitable rather than just one pathway to recovery.

@notaurewhatusername and @Sundaysunshine21 - forceps delivery isn’t what anyone would choose but my first daughter was born with forceps and I recovered perfectly fine. It may depend where you have your baby and how experienced your carers are. We live in London - I gave birth at a big hospital with lots of facilities and staff. But obviously this wasn’t planned. if you would like a Caesarean, it’s definitely worth going for.

I wanted a “natural” (no epidural) vaginal birth.
What I got was an induction ending in an emergency C-section with a spinal block.
Despite having been awake for 24+ hours and nil by mouth for about 2 days. I recovered very quickly and we went for walks by day 3 (living in town centre must have helped as I do love walking around shops).

On the other hand I had a major abdominal surgery last year to save my life that according to the drs was similar to a C-section and it took a year and 3 months to be able to move “normally”.

You just never know what you get.

I had an emergency section with my first due failure to progress. It was scary but everyone else was calm and the actual experience was fine. I didn’t really have much pain afterwards and recovery was fine but took a while. However the baby didn’t feed well and was generally unsettled. With my second I had a forceps delivery with an epidural. To be honest that seemed more “emergency” like than the section. Loads of people in the room, lots of bustling around. The baby had some bruising but fed well and was very settled. I don’t have any issues from the birth either, I recovered more quickly than from the section but the first week or so were probably worse due to the stitches.

Can anyone tell me about long lasting injuries they've had from both as this factoring into my decisions too? I don't want even worse vaginal problems than I currently have for life and I also don't want back problems from a c section either!! What's more likely?

Also I'm normal weight and 38, but do have a blood clot underlying issue so that does worry me a bit about c section

I had 2nd degree tears with both mine as big babies, but I had no long lasting issues from this. With both I was up and pushing baby down street in pram 2 days after giving birth. I did have some mild stress incontinence after 1st, but a fews physio sessions sorted that out.

The major issues around a c section relate to scar tissue and adhesions around the incision. Some people associate epidurals for c sections with back issues, but these back issues link to the pregnancy, and the incision through the abdominal muscles weakening them rather than the epidural in most cases.

With both c section and vaginally delivery they want you up and around a few hours after to reduce the clot risk