Inequality is widening even in middle class children

[Ifelttherainsinafrica]

We live in a nice, mc road. Kids all go to the nice state schools nearby & most of the kids went to activities in the evening. Since September those kids have been out playing since 9 even after dark some as old as 4... I asked dd why her friends were no longer coming to karate & soccer, she said their parents can't afford it.. I met one of our neighbours this evening who said they had to cut right back on extras for the kids due to the cost of living.. Feel so sorry for the kids.. The inequality used be between the working class & middle class now many of the middle class can no longer afford what they used be able to.. Aibu to think this or is it just my perception?

Just to add the amount of short sighted posters on this thread is astounding.

You are able to diagnose myopia online?
Your post about 'Tthose sneering' is rather disingenuous

I am thinking of the bigger picture - swimming is a basic life skill and it's up to parents to ensure that their child can swim, along with walking, eating, talking, and toilet training.
How much would it cost for the taxpayer to fund swimming lessons for every child? Where exactly do you think that money is going to come from? Please do explain.

Well of course it is up to the parent but if the parents can't afford it then the state or councils must provide some means to ensure these kids can swim. It is essential. How many drownings a year do you hear about each summer? Think less about your pocket. Luckily my council does provide free sessions in the holidays and very discounted swimming card in the summer holidays but I bet many places don't.

@Howmanycatsistoomany

https://pepassport.co.uk/school-swimming/#:~:text=Schools%20have%20a%20statutory%20obligation,before%20they%20leave%20Year%206.

The British taxpayers already fund swimming lessons through the national curriculum. However due do lack of public pools in more rural areas these lessons are not being implemented with many children missing out, another example of inequality. It is part of the curriculum, every single child should have access to in person lessons, learning the theory is not good enough.

On the subject of football it hits a nerve with me. I have played & coached for most of my life. I have been in and around kids and adult football for over 30yrs. I lived a breathed it until the MC parents spoiled it, i got out and tbh i havent got an ounce of sympathy for them or their kids missing out.

Let me expand on that. When i started playing football it was 100% volunteers. It was about as many kids as possible getting to exercise and being coached by a dad or a mum (my late mum used to run a kids 5 a side team 30 yrs ago) or a enthusiastic ex player who would charge 50p per week to cover league entry costs. The strip was usually donated by a local company or a local pub. You finished your match and you handed your strip back to the coach. You trained in whatever kit you could muster on school pitches on evenings free of charge. Basically a single mother with 3 little boys could just about afford to get her kids some nice healthy exercise without worrying about it effecting their ability to eat. If she couldnt the 50p per week was waived and often an old set of footy boots would be found for the kids. Street kids had the edge because they didnt have as much focus on schooling and they would be out in the street until dark playing.

A lot will say thats how it is now, but it isnt. Kids sport is all about who can afford the most. Each kid now has a match strip, a training kit, training waterproofs, astro boots, grass boots etc etc. You pay a annual fee to be part of the club. They now play on all weather 4g pitches which have to be hired out at huge expense. The MC parents standing watching demanding to know why little Timmy isnt the best player on the pitch because they are also paying the coach for extra 1-1 coaching to increase both his ability and his chances of being the star player with the coach. £25 per hour, £35 per hour, £50 per hour. Ex professionals now charge for specialist coaching for little Timmy and now to be in a team a player needs to be 'associated' with the coaching setup. The single mother with the 3 kids now hasnt got a hope in hell of getting her kids regular exercise and the opportunities needed. Yes there are 'other' teams in the leagues but now its all about the ONE team who has all the best players, all the facilities and has the links to professional clubs. Games are 10-0 and the few rough diamonds are lost as they get sick of it. The leagues are in a terrible state now. Not your 10,12,14 yr olds. Thats funded by MC mummy & daddy. Once they get to 16 they are all deserting it unless they are the few with real loves. Adult amateur football used to have 4 leagues (mine locally) now has 1 league and clubs playing each other 4 times. Once MC mummy and daddy lose interest, so does little Timmy. He doesnt want to be playing on 'normal' pitches getting cold and dirty in a strip he has to hand back and possibly wasnt washed very well the week before.

TBH this also applies to most sports. If you have the money your child has the opportunity. I have zero sympathy for MC parents making kids sport expensive. They brought it on themselves.

Firstly, parents who can't swim cannot teach their child to swim.

Secondly, I'm glad you acknowledge it's a life skill, but swimming lessons are relatively expensive. We pay over £60 per month, per child. Some councils offer discounts but it's not always convenient for working parents to organise attendance.

Free sessions at school allows for some contact with structured swimming lessons. As a working class, high earning, DC in private swimming lessons since 1 year old, household, I'm happy our tax offers this opportunity to many children of whatever class.

A lot of people seem to think they are, though.

A lot of posters missing the wider issue here. Instead of sniping at each other you should be angry. Really angry.

Safe, comfortable housing has become unaffordable for so many. Housing costs are the single biggest factor impacting people’s financial security. Not whether kids are playing outside or not.

The Labour housing bill doesn’t go far enough in my view. But it’s more than the Tories ever did. Not surprising given how many Tory MPs are also landlords.

This won’t improve until the UK is no longer an attractive place for the tax avoiding mega rich to use as their holiday resort/investment vehicle.

Raise the mega wealth taxes and enforce them then wait for the billionaire exodus. We need them to leave. We can’t afford to continue servicing them.

What's stopping people volunteering their time and engaging with local businesses to set this up? Most can't be bothered, leagues could exist alongside the paid ones- people want something for nothing without bothering themselves.

Some parents can’t swim, are maybe very nervous of the water, and so are very reluctant to take their children swimming.

All the more reason for the opportunity at the primary school stage.

There were 125 child (under 17 years) drowning deaths in England in the last four years, 86% of which occurred when the child was unsupervised by an adult. 51 children drowned in the home.
Child Drowning Update September 2024: England | Royal Life Saving Society UK ( RLSS UK )
So yes, I do place 100% responsibility on parents to ensure their child can swim, to educate them about the dangers of bodies of water, and to supervise them.

And I'm no longer a UK taxpayer so not thinking of my pocket. But I am thinking of all the pensioners who are going to die because they can't afford to heat their homes this winter.

What relevance is that?

Absolutely. I work as a nanny to a middle class family and my boss feels like the kids would be missing out if they don't do lots of activities. They do a long enough day at school (private school, finsishes at 4) plus loads of homework, then all these activities after school and at the weekends when I know sometimes they'd like to just play at home or the park.

@Ifelttherainsinafrica , I completely understand the point you're making.

There is something wrong with the system when a 'middle class' income can no longer afford a 'middle class' lifestyle.

It may be that there better terminology than 'middle class'. Perhaps 'above average earner' better captures it, as many stereotypically middle class jobs (eg, in publishing, academia, the arts, etc) are not paid that well, and may be outstripped – perhaps significantly – by trades. But let's not get derailed. We now live in a country in which lots of people on so-called good wages have little discretionary expenditure once basic living costs are paid for. This is not to suggest that this is the most disadvantaged group in our society. Rather, it is to suggest that this is, for want of a better words, nuts.

It is great for kids' social, physical and emotional development to participate in sports and hobbies. Those intimating that the loss of these things is no biggie are simply being disingenuous. To be clear, I'm all in favour of ensuring that kids have plenty of time for unstructured play, and think that many kids are over-committed, but what the OP is describing is not a deliberate, carefully-considered parenting choice, but an economically-driven resourcing choice. It's just one manifestation of a bigger problem with the cost of living.

They probably get a lot more exercise playing out in the street, than a few hours of organised activity per week.

Plus kids learn more about fairness and taking responsibility for their own behaviour, without adults constantly being there to jump in and sort out squabbles.

The thing is everyone is dropping and the MORE people affected the WORSE those at the bottom are. There’s no winners.

Quite.

Maybe the money being used for children on free school meals should be re-directed to middle class children for the extra-curricular activities.

The reports I have seen actually show that outside the top 1-2% (still pulling away from the rest of us), income inequality hasn't changed much in the last 20-30 years.
https://ifs.org.uk/living-standards-poverty-and-inequality-uk#how-unequal

Regarding swimming, it takes a long time of 30 minute lessons to actually be able to swim properly and therefore make it a life skill. It's exposure to the water that makes the difference, so whilst council funded lessons wouldn't be a bad thing, it's unlikely anyone will learn to swim well with a block of 6 lessons <waits for posters to come on to say that their dc were all swimming 25 meters on week 2>

Yep as I said above my sons team didn't get a sponsor this year so we bought the kit ourselves including a club puffa style coat. A couple of overnights for matches (train, hotel, food & spending money) camps that seem to now be obligatory it you are on the A or B team (or you are letting your team down!) & sporadic workshops with agility /speed /technique coaches which are expensive & not subsidised by the club..
Folk might say cut back, do what you can afford... All well & good but it's a team sport so if your child isn't availing of all on offer & not attending the away matches there isn't a spot on the team any longer..

Local businesses can no longer afford to sponsor teams!!!
This is the first year my sons team havn't had a sponsor, other age groups also haven't had sponsorship renewed. Trust me parents have knocked on every door.

Well there is no adult out supervising them. It's dark from 7 onwards & the street is busy with traffic.. My kids play out too at the weekends & when there's nothing on in the evenings, in before dark for homework, dinner, bath etc.. I have nothing against play on the street & the children are lovely. I'm just highlighting the difference in their lives between now & 6 months ago. They tell my dc they are so lucky to be going to the clubs & might go back after Christmas if parents can afford to send them..

That's good then.

And fingers crossed for after Christmas.

With pressures of working parents regardless of their class or income, most teams aren't viable to train in winter daylight hours on weekdays because the coaches and the parents (transport/ children in childcare) are working until night has fallen. That renders floodlit facilities essential.

The days of people working in their communities are largely gone (unless WFH) and have been for a long time. Working hours are longer. Part of the devestation of pit towns and industrial communities was the gradual breakdown of the social and sporting communities that followed and that's had a massive impact on accessibility of opportunites and experiences.

Many activities, even when volunteer led have become more professionalised. There are expectations such as safeguarding, data protection, accounting that increase the training load for leaders, and in turn the costs that pay up to HQ that have inflated. Councils slashed their youth budgets in the early 2010s with the loss of youth clubs and access to schemes like the Duke of Edinburgh's award where they could support with lending kit.

It's not just changing markets. The whole social structure and interaction of work and leisure changed.