Horrible director

[dixon86]

I handed in my notice at work yesterday. I've been in my job for three years and looking for a new job for over two years

I've heard many stories of the director getting people in to his office once they've handed their notice in and giving them a hard time. Telling them that they're making a bad decision and that the place they're moving to is a bad place, not as good as here etc

There's also been instances where once somebody hands their notice in he completely blanks them. Walks past them a few feet away and totally ignores them. He's not a nice man, a micro managing bully. Lots of people have been signed off with stress and left because of him

I'm wondering what the MN advice would be as to how to handle him if I get called in to his office and told that I'm making a mistake and that the job I'm going to isn't as good, the company is rubbish etc

My plan at the moment is to keep things simple and to just say I'm leaving because I want to work closer to home, currently commuting forty miles a day Mon-Fri. I don't want to give him ammunition and to go in to details as to why I'm leaving anymore than that

He's the sort of person that when he asks a question and gets an answer he has to dig and dig and dig for more info. I can't stand him and I hate being in his presence

A huge part of why I'm leaving is because I've been doing the job on my own for nearly 2.5 years as he took my colleague away and has unofficially given them another role. My job has been awful having to do it on my own for so long. I don't really want to go down this road and tell him this. It wouldn't get me anywhere. I just want to see out my final weeks and leave with minimal stress

TIA

Do you have to tell him where you are going?

Ask yourself, what would it take for you to stay? More flexibility, more pay, WFH etc. Tell him that’s what you are going for (even if it’s not strictly true). Essentially make him believe are leaving for yourself not because he’s a cockwomble. It is a lie but it’ll make the last few weeks potentially more bearable.

Or just go off sick for your notice period.

Have you had your contract yet? And is he giving you a reference?
Honestly, I'd do the same as you, I'll miss it here but I need to work closer to home, and not answer anything else
In some jobs it's better to change company every few years anyway, especially with idiot bosses lol 😂

You don't have to tell him anything other than that you're leaving and your last day – he's not entitled to the information. Fully take the emotion out of it, OP.

‘I have made my decision and am not willing to discuss this further’

Don't disclose where you're going and if he asks for a meeting, ask for an agenda beforehand. Keep putting him off and eventually he'll run out of steam

Agree with him, then there's no argument!

"Dixon, company xyz is really shit"
"Yes I know Smile"
"and you're still leaving?!"
"Yes :)"
"We could offer you so much more here"
"I'm sure you could more smiles"

as suggested above ☝️

Sound a bit regretful to be leaving, but you’ve had an offer you can’t refuse (reveal some made up uncounterable features of your new position if you want).

assume You have a contract

Would you be up for pushing back at him, and giving him a taste of his own medicine?

I’m leaving because you’re a micromanaging bully.
I am incredulous that you feel the need to comment on my resignation given how you behave as a manager.
and so on

Do we have the same director OP?! Mine was exactly the same. I was his PA (unfortunately) and when we had a resignation, if the person were female he’d have me try to convince them
to stay ‘woman to woman.’ In the beginning I would set the meetings up with the women leaving so he’d see them in my diary and just use them to say ta ra I hope your new job is better. Towards the end I just did a half smile when he asked and never set the meetings up. I’d just say no luck unfortunately when he asked for an update.

He was a horrible, odious man and made me leave a job I was in for 10 years last year because I couldn’t bare to be around him any longer.

You're doing the right thing. In my exit interview with him when he probed me for answers I just said I want a shorter commute and better work/life balance - I didn’t want to burn my bridges incase he left one day and I got the chance to return.

Perfect

Unless you want to be more bolshy in which case "it's none of your fucking business!" - I mean what's he gunna do? Sack you?

Be like a politician. You say what you have to say and repeat only that. ‘That’s all there is to it.” “As I said, it’s because of x.”

Thanks everybody

I will take all of the above in to account

I definitely don't want to discuss anything with him. I have signed a contract for my new job already

He really is a horrible, horrible person. The first time I ever met him I instantly knew there was something off about him

Up until now I've always bit my tongue and told him what he wants to hear just to end conversations as quickly as possible and to get out of the board room as fast as possible

I think the "I've made my decision and am not willing to discuss it any further" could be a good stance

Even my own manager told me that it's best to give him as little info as possible in any situation because he always has to start digging and asking and asking

This is why I've planned for a long time to say that I want to work closer to home as there is literally nothing he can come back with. They would never offer WFH

I may not get questioned but I'm the only person in the company of 180 people that does my job so it will be a big PITA for them to replace me but that's not something I care about

He was vile to me once on the Friday before we were going away to celebrate our wedding anniversary and I'm so proud how I didn't let his words ruin our weekend away but it took a huge effort to not let him ruin it. That meeting was the final nail in the coffin