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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask if you’ve ever lightly tapped a car and driven away?

44 replies

TheSpoonyOchreSnail · 09/10/2024 10:59

Earlier today, I had a small bump with another car while parking, and there was no visible damage. I didn’t leave a note or anything because it seemed so minor, but now I’m wondering if I should’ve done something. Has anyone been in this situation and just driven off? How did you handle it?

OP posts:
Autumnspices · 09/10/2024 11:03

Everyone will tell you they haven’t and that you are a terrible person for doing so. But the truth is we probably all have scratches on cars from this happening, so obviously pretty much everyone does.

Balloonhearts · 09/10/2024 11:04

Once. It was a very light touch and left no mark. I checked both cars really carefully though.

W0tnow · 09/10/2024 11:06

Yes, I have. No point doing anything if there’s no damage. I’ve also seen it done to my car. I mean making contact is not ideal but no harm, no foul.

pizzaHeart · 09/10/2024 11:08

We went to a farm shop came back in 2 hours and our car had a tiny scratch and no note so obviously yes, people do this.

MeMyCatsAndI · 09/10/2024 11:09

One time I bumped a neighbours car at litteraly 1mph I know I didn't mark it as I checked.
I told her thought I was doing the right thing, nothing was said till one day I got home and had a letter through the door saying she's had quotes done and it would cost me £545 in repairs.
It turned out someone else had driven into her car the next day and drove off and had dented it & scratched it leaving behind red paint (my car was blue!) and she thought she'd get me to pay for it.

Never again will I tell anyone if I haven't left a mark. Some people are crafty and no I didn't pay for the neighbours car.

Lanzarotelady · 09/10/2024 11:14

Autumnspices · 09/10/2024 11:03

Everyone will tell you they haven’t and that you are a terrible person for doing so. But the truth is we probably all have scratches on cars from this happening, so obviously pretty much everyone does.

This!
We have all done it

HelpMeGetThrough · 09/10/2024 11:39

I have and it did leave a mark. Idiot in the street would purposely park too close to my car, because they are an arsehole. Warned them that one day it might get hit.

They didn't stop, so it got hit. Their own bloody fault.

Nogaxeh · 09/10/2024 11:55

TheSpoonyOchreSnail · 09/10/2024 10:59

Earlier today, I had a small bump with another car while parking, and there was no visible damage. I didn’t leave a note or anything because it seemed so minor, but now I’m wondering if I should’ve done something. Has anyone been in this situation and just driven off? How did you handle it?

I saw this exact situation play out in a car park yesterday. A car reversed into another with what sounded like quite a big bump, but when it pulled away there was no visible damage. I reassured the driver of the car that I couldn't see anything, and so I think they decided to leave without leaving a note.

I was quite impressed with the design and build of the cars that they would cope with it without being damaged. I think glancing blows can be more damaging (for very minor collisions) because they can scrape the paint off.

If there's no damage then there's no point in leaving a note.

coffeesaveslives · 09/10/2024 11:57

If there's no damage there's nothing to report imo. I would take photos though just in case someone saw you and tries to call you out on social media.

Echobelly · 09/10/2024 12:05

YANBU.

I had a very odd scenario once where I had to reverse down a very parked up narrow road and I suddenly there was a cruch as it turned out one parked car was angled out into the road in a way that was hard to see. I think I left a small dent in one door.

Anyway there was an old geezer in the front of the car I hit so I tapped on the window to talk to him and he looked at me and then looked away. And then just didn't engage with me at all - like he didn't shoo me off, he didn't look angry, just... nothing. I stood there for a few minutes to see if anyone came out of a nearby house or something, but nothing happened and so I just drove off as I didn't know what else to do! I didn't have any paper on me to put a message under the windscreen wiper or anything.

I suspect old geezer didn't speak English and/,or maybe came from a culture where you just accept cars getting dinked now and then (certainly the case in some places). It was very odd.

Oldermum84 · 09/10/2024 12:08

It's what bumpers are for, surely?! 🤣

Seashellssanctuary · 09/10/2024 12:12

Nogaxeh · 09/10/2024 11:55

I saw this exact situation play out in a car park yesterday. A car reversed into another with what sounded like quite a big bump, but when it pulled away there was no visible damage. I reassured the driver of the car that I couldn't see anything, and so I think they decided to leave without leaving a note.

I was quite impressed with the design and build of the cars that they would cope with it without being damaged. I think glancing blows can be more damaging (for very minor collisions) because they can scrape the paint off.

If there's no damage then there's no point in leaving a note.

Edited
Show quote history

The problem with this is that as youstated it was quite a loud bump then there could easily be unseen and very costly damage.

If it is an impact that is loud enough to hear the right thing to do is report/ leave a note.

PurpleChrayn · 09/10/2024 12:16

I've done this loads.

Nogaxeh · 09/10/2024 12:18

Seashellssanctuary · 09/10/2024 12:12

The problem with this is that as youstated it was quite a loud bump then there could easily be unseen and very costly damage.

If it is an impact that is loud enough to hear the right thing to do is report/ leave a note.

Show quote history

Like damage to the internal electrics, something like that?

That is an aspect I had not considered.

MrsSkylerWhite · 09/10/2024 12:20

No, only ever tapped someone once in the school car park. Left a note and sorted out the scratch.

Being perfectly honest, I don’t know whether I just felt compelled to do the right thing or whether I was worried there’d be cctv and I’d be a pariah if I just drove off. Probably a mix of the two 😁

SnoozyTeaBags · 09/10/2024 12:23

Nogaxeh · 09/10/2024 11:55

I saw this exact situation play out in a car park yesterday. A car reversed into another with what sounded like quite a big bump, but when it pulled away there was no visible damage. I reassured the driver of the car that I couldn't see anything, and so I think they decided to leave without leaving a note.

I was quite impressed with the design and build of the cars that they would cope with it without being damaged. I think glancing blows can be more damaging (for very minor collisions) because they can scrape the paint off.

If there's no damage then there's no point in leaving a note.

Edited
Show quote history

Thanks for quoting the OP @Nogaxeh , because it's not as if , you know, WE HAVE ALL READ IT!

Why do people do this?!

@TheSpoonyOchreSnail the amount of touches other cars have got from the wind taking car door out of hands and lightly knocking another car/cars parked too close etc - I would have been forever writing my phone number down when my kids were little.

Ariela · 09/10/2024 12:23

No, because I've never hit anyone like that.

Did you take photos of no damage? I hope you did just in case they've dash cam footage and decide to claim on their insurance or something.

TheGoogleMum · 09/10/2024 12:23

Bumped a car at a supermarket carpark. I had just arrived. I tried to go in the shop but people were freaking out about me bumping this other car so I ended up waiting by it. The lady came out huffing that others told her I'd bumped her car. She then looked at it and said oh its just a tiny scuff can get it out with elbow grease. She took my phone number but I never heard from her.

Itssodark · 09/10/2024 12:25

There was no damage no need for a note.

Xyz1234567 · 09/10/2024 12:25

If you're 100% sure you did no damage, there's nothing to say. People that do cause damage and drive off are absolute scum. Yes, whoever bashed in the door of my brand new car, I'm talking to you.

Jadebanditchillipepper · 09/10/2024 12:28

I bumped a parked car once, but it was dark so even with my phone torch, I couldn't be 100% certain that there was no damage. I took photos anyway and left a note on the windscreen with my number in case there was any damage.

I never heard anything

nappyvalley1992 · 09/10/2024 12:31

I think the problem is people just can't afford to pay or to have it claimed against their insurance these days.

Zooks · 09/10/2024 12:32

Tap bumper low speed parking yes. That’s what it’s there for.

Hit any other part of car … likely damage, yes leave note

Nogaxeh · 09/10/2024 12:34

@SnoozyTeaBags - the quote button is right there. Kinda natural and automatic to use it, though of course superfluous in my case. I will make strenuous efforts to desist in future, quite right.

pelargoniums · 09/10/2024 12:40

scraped a car once, no damage, no noise so wouldn’t have been anything internal. Was tempted to drive off but it was outside daycare and there were other people parked up, I didn’t want anyone writing down my number plate. Wish I hadn’t left the note, the car owner was a drama llama who rang going, “Well, I’ve had the shock of my life! Coming back to my bumper hanging off! Like a hit and run!” Lady, I have pictures, you chancer.