To be embarrassed about my behaviour in hospital?

[lizardsandgheckosandfrogs]

this happened a few weeks ago but has been slightly playing on my mind (out of embarrassment!)

I was unwell and was getting treatment in hospital. The medication had to be given quickly (not sure if there a name for it, but it was given in a syringe quickly into the cannula rather than on a drip,

As soon as the medication and the saline got put in I immediately felt like my arm was burning and over the course of about 10s it became excruciating and there was basically a huge tangerine size lump. I went from being quiet and chatting away to the nurses to literally wailing and sobbing and begging them to take it out my arm, all in about 10 seconds. I was honestly hysterical.

it turned out the cannula was in the wrong position or something along those lines, so all the medication and saline just went into my elbow instead. Not a big deal, they removed it and it was all fine.

it was a few weeks ago and it’s just been playing on my mind since. I’ve never reacted like that before, and I think part of it was panic setting in, but I really remember it being excruciating and I was in so much pain. It honestly felt like my arm was on fire. But I’ve never been so hysterical or reacted like that before, I was literally sobbing and probably would have ripped it out myself if I could have!

im in my 40s and have never ever behaved like that before and I guess I’m just a bit embarrassed and cringing thinking about it all. Was I being a bit of a baby or is this kind of thing genuinely really painful?

I had a cracking bruise and could barely bend my elbow for 2 weeks after so i know it genuinely was sore, but just not sure if it was that sore to justify my reaction or if I was being a bit OTT!

has anyone else ever had this?!

Just to further clarify (I realise my title makes it sound as if I behaved badly!) I didn’t swear or kick off or anything like that and I don’t remember being rude to anyone (and I really hope I wasn’t!) but by behaviour I just meant how much I was sobbing and was completely hysterical - I think I was panicking but I do remember it hurting but just not sure it really hurt that much or if I was behaving a bit OTT!

Healthcare professional hear. Cannulas can get misplaced but that sounds super painful if if all the med went into the tissue rather than the vein - please don’t worry about it. People complain about MUCH less

Sounds awful and I very much doubt anyone present would have thought you were being OTT. It was their fault that they put it in the wrong place: expect they were glad there wasn't a worse consequence to their error tbh.

Forget about it. I was screaming ‘oh god’ over and over when I decided to take the option of a pain free labour!

I felt absolutely ridiculous afterwards but the pain was baaadd

They are used to people reacting to pain

Sounds like a perfectly normal response given the circumstances.

I think the medical staff who misplaced it and caused you pain have more to worry about and be embarrassed about tbh. I hope they apologised.

There's nothing they haven't seen before. Something wasn't right - you reacted - they sorted it. Bet they felt awful as well. But these things happen, on both sides. Think no more of it.

former HCP don't worry. In that situation, I would have felt bad for causing you pain. Unfortunately, cannulas displace regularly, no on will be judging you to your reaction to something that can be very painful. at least you didn't punch the nurse ( yes I,ve had that happen)

Please try not to worry, some medication can sting and go into the tissue, you could write and ask what is was as some are supposed to be in a drip not a syringe. Don't fret about how you reacted or what the staff thought, the drug would have been absorbed but took longer to work.

I’m a doctor . It sounds like you very reasonably wanted them to recognise and deal with the problem . Fluid ‘tissueing is very painful. They should have stopped it sooner.

When I had a emergency c section with poor pain relief I remember screaming and howling as loudly as I could to make everyone understand how bad it was . It’s just a physiological response to pain and nothing to feel embarrassed about. I was with colleagues in my own place of work but I’m not embarrassed …

Honestly, I hope you can let this worry go. Tissued cannulas are agony. Any HCP knows this.

Many years ago I was in A&E resus (a dept I’d worked in previously) as a patient and needed an arterial blood gas. I was very very poorly. I remember very clearly going from semi conscious to thinking ‘who is making that awful awful noise’ - like a screaming. Hideous.

Reader, it was me.

Some procedures really hurt, and it’s okay to vocalise that.

(hope you are recovering well OP)

OP the very same happened to me. Please don’t worry. It is agony when a needle goes into tissue and you need it out NOW.
You weren’t abusive or inappropriate, you were in pain!

I had this on the wrist mine felt like it was freezing as opposed to hot, and had a lump the size of an orange but it is agonising so letting them know so is okay it happens fast too so you're a bit like omg what ??

Oh OP please don’t worry you’ve done nothing to be embarrassed about! If anything the nurses were probably more upset they’d cause pain to you rather than your reaction.

The fact it is playing on your mind shows you’re a lovely person who wouldn’t usually behave like this, and they will have seen and put up with MUCH worse. They won’t have given it a second thought and will of dealt with hundreds of patients since you so try not to beat yourself up about it x

Totally normal reaction, this happened to me after DD was born, they needed to get a cannula in quickly as I needed a drip for after she was born and labour went a lot quicker than they expected, so they hurried getting the cannula in and it went in wrong and first I knew was when my hand was massive and in agony. The pain of labour had dulled it a bit but I still screamed lol

It happened to me once when my chemo leaked into tissue in my arm. My arm felt like it was on fire. The pain was awful. I couldn't bear to put my coat on. Heat packs helped but it was horrible. The very sore lump in my arm took took about 5 months to go flat & I still have a dark mark at the site 3 months further on.
I don't blame you you for making a fuss, & I certainly wouldn't worry about it. You were in pain & scared. The nurses will have understood.

I was rushed into theatre for an emergency c under general anaesthetic and prior to this had no pain relief and was 9cm dialated. I was begging and screaming and begging. I felt embarrassed for weeks after but it’s been more than a year and I couldn’t care less now haha

Do you have some moral beliefs around pain? Or around feeling that you must conquer your animal body, or be ashamed of it?

Often we hold ideas from childhood that don't really make sense when we examine them. Your body reacted to danger, and that reaction protected you. This is how your body works.

Agreed. I wouldn't waste a moment more worrying about it. You did nothing wrong. x

You’re fine OP! You did nothing wrong. The staff should have realised the cannula was tissued and not pushed the bolus. Post-delivery a midwife flushed my cannula before hanging up some IV medication. I said the cannula had tissued (I felt the saline flush and there was a bump under my skin). She didn’t believe me and started running the IV. It really hurt, and I was mad with her (she didn’t care and didn’t apologise).

You poor thing, that must have been so painful. I doubt you’re the only one who would have acted that way and in a way it’s good you did, to alert them to the problem!

Don’t worry about it, they must see far, far worse behaviour from people.

I'm not bothered by cannulas anymore and I've blown valves in multiple veins but honestly I think what happened to you feels horrible and I'm not sure I wouldn't react that way either.
I wouldn't worry about it now, I have no doubt through nurses that took care of you are or thought you were being dramatic.

Seems a perfectly reasonable response. Most people would panic and be arrrrghhh what's happening in that situation. I doubt many people will be sat there thinking oh best not fuss excuse me my arms in agony and there's a lump the size of a tangerine there.

Yeah had that happen to me several times it hurts bad I would imagine I acted similar each time can't say iv really thought about it after it's happened. Healthcare workers won't even bat an eyelid on this do you not think they see people shouting, screaming,kicking, swearing, crying and fighting on a daily basis.

You sound pretty heroic to me, OP. I responded weirdly to the aftermath of my epidural, and was slightly out of my mind -- I forbade anyone from coming anywhere near my baby and apparently said I would kick anyone who approached (which given that I still couldn't move my lower body was hilariously optimistic). I apologised later, but I'm sure they've seen far worse, like the man with the woman in the next bed in the post-natal ward who kicked off because the baby's surname on its bracelet was given as its mother's surname. I think he got chucked out.