Are there things you've done in the past that you still feel really embarrassed about now?

[Alectoishome]

I was only 20 when I got married, 21 when I started having DC. I didn't realise that when guests come, because you've recently got engaged/promotion/new baby etc and they bring champagne.. you are supposed to open it while they are there. I just saw it as a gift like any other, it didn't occur to me to open it them. I think I blundered in this way on numerous occasions and still feel embarrassed when I think of it. I don't drink really anyway so it's not like I was keeping it back out of greed.

In the haze of several DC back-to-back I also had friends come to visit, sometimes from up to an hour away and a couple of times I offered them nothing more than tea/coffee as I think I just presumed they were calling in for an hour. But then it ended being for longer and I realised after they'd gone that it was after lunch and they'd surely gone away hungry.

Once I had a friend drive two hours with her DC to visit and I'd burnt the quiches I'd made so just tried to bluff the rest of lunch but it was so sparse and the house must've smelt of burnt food and I still feel mortified and think why did I not just say what had happened and also surely there was more food in the cupboards that I could have rustled up.

I'm sure there are so many others. I feel I went out into the world quite unprepared on what the 'done thing' is but also I think perhaps having three babies in 4 years sort of unhinged me temporarily in the sense I didn't really think about things like social niceties as well as I should have? Sometimes I see threads on here about CFs and I think 'oh god was I CF back then?' I never wrote a single thank you card for wedding, newborn, christening gifts etc.

There were also many occasions I did all the right things, made guests lunches, dinner etc - but I just cringe at the ones where I seem to had temporarily forgotten how to behave!

Do you have things from the past that you still feel embarrassed about? I have other memories too of falling over during a work presentation and other moments where I wanted to sink through the floor but those occasions are no reflection on my character so it's a different kind of embarrassment.

Oh Jesus, I’ve just remembered something pretty recent that I was absolutely mortified over, seriously mortified. I’m autistic & bloody awkward as hell anyway & have a shocking memory when it comes to names/faces. I KNOW I recognise them but never know where from etc. Anyway, I can’t believe I’m going to admit to this but

we were on a night out in my home town, I moved away about 25 years earlier for Uni. I was with my sister who dragged someone over & said look who it is. I was bladdered & really couldn’t remember who he was but definitely recognised him. Then it clicked into place, I knew exactly who it was. We chatted for ages, had a right laugh, remember this, remember that etc etc. people I was out with talked about how close we must have been as kids/teens etc & how nice it was to see us catch up.

A couple of weeks later he passed away & I was invited to the funeral as he’d talked about how fun it was for us to catch up. It was at the funeral that I realised he wasn’t who I thought it was, I didn’t actually have a bloody clue who he was. Why he didn’t pull me up on my stories from that night I’ll never know, or maybe he did & I was too drunk to bloody realise. I felt so bad at that funeral, I still don’t really know where I know him from & have been far too embarrassed to ask anyone now he’s passed away

I guess you could say she didn’t indicate properly.

😂

@bagginsatbagend mortifying! But it sounds he had a great time in conversation with you.

I have many many MANY embarrassing moments. I'll just be minding my own business when a memory of one slaps me in the face and I'll let out a groan 🙈

That’s the one thing I try to think of, he was obviously happy that we caught up after maybe 25-30 years I’m just both really embarrassed & a bit ashamed really that I went to his funeral thinking he was someone else then not even remembering who is when I found out

Every stupid, embarrassing, cringe inducing thing I’ve said or done is stored in my brain. They surface at random moments.

I have adhd and probably autism so my entire life is one big embarrassing moment 😆 🤣

That really made me laugh!

I remember ordering my first legal drink at a spoons, wasn’t particularly sheltered but very socially awkward. I think I asked for a glass of rose, but obviously mumbled and stuttered enough that I was presented with the rose and a bottle of sol 😂 I said thank you and took both

Mortifying but also very lovely!

Oh I can imagine! I think I have blanked out all the ways I embarrassed myself as a gauche, naive 16 year old office junior. My face used to turn bright red at the drop of a hat. Painful years...

Why do they pop up unawares like that, usually when I want to go to sleep 😩

So funny!

Oh me too!

Fabulous!!!!!!!

Oh my gosh we may well be twins! Especially as I teach the first past the post system in Sociology and I always argue that it is unfair and outdated!
I feel a lot better hearing that I wasn't the only slightly underage teenager in a pub that was massively out of their social depth 😂

@Alectoishome did they bring chilled champagne on ice?

If it was on ice and chilled then you open it. If it's just a bottle of champagne then it's a gift to be opened another time because opening warm champagne would just be silly!

Very recently accused someone of not responding to a group email when they had in fact responded separately.

Er..?

Soo many lol. I was/am a little eccentric and loud but yet awkward especially as a teen.

A few years ago it was around Christmas time and I walked into town to do some xmas shopping, I was quite hungover and wearing my brand new cool shirt and jeans that I thought I looked really quirky in. I had a green fur jacket over the shirt and felt super cool/good

I was in Mcdonalds and a woman was staring at me, I thought she was looking at me admiring my outfit/look. She then told me all my clothes were on backwards ...all I could do was laugh and thank her and pretend not to be embarassed but I was dying inside. lol

Another time I was young/immature and started in a new job, not racist at all but there were two women named 'Jane' one was caucasian and one was african. I'd heard the african womans best friend referring to her as 'Black Jane' which was a personal joke between just them, I didn't even know the African woman. One day we were out in the smoking area and I loudly exclaimed infront of everyone while they were looking for her "You can call her black jane, yeah she's fine with it!'' then a woman looked at me like "eh you could just call her by her first and last name"

Great thread. Would recommend Dawn French's book - The Twat Files. She talks about all her faux pas and how to take back power. Talk about the experiences, laugh at yourself, see it for what it was, not what you've built it into to. Tell a friend. It takes away the shame and allows us to realise idiocy is part of the human condition and everyone at some point has said or done something ridiculous.

There are things I've said and done in the past that truly make me die a little inside. Nothing nasty - just poor judgment or where other people made me feel stupid. Time makes me realise I was younger then and just learning about life. I still say stupid things now, but allow myself grace. I try to laugh at it and not turn it into negative talk. Moments of twattiness are normal. Embrace them!