What's the worst meal you've ever eaten?

[latteloverr]

I'll go first. Steak and coco pops. The steak was in the coco pops. DD made it.

That reminded me of my first meal in hospital after 48 hours giving birth to DC1. I had ordered Gammon and pineapple with jacket potato. I actually got one square of the cheapest processed, slimy wafer-thin ham (no pineapple) and a jacket potato the size of an egg.

That has got to be up there with my worst ever meals.

Definitely, for me it was the signature dish of a very famous french chef who hosted a special evening at Selfridges. He's been awarded with 3 Michelin stars so I was expecting good things. I don't know what I was thinking but his signature dish is pig trotters, I thought it might be very slow-cooked and tender but what I was presented with was a grey gelatinous pigs foot. It was vile and cost an absolute fortune.

The thing that springs to mind is plain pasta with dolmio dolloped on top straight from the jar. At a friend’s house as a child.

Any kind of undercooked meat (that isn’t meant to be undercooked, I don’t mean steak or similar) all turn my stomach - I’m happy I no longer eat meat as it avoids this sort of awkwardness. Again anything with a jelly like texture or fatty/ entraily. Such a good excuse that I ever eat meat now!

A former friend from England who claimed to be a private chef to royalty and superyacht owners once cooked for me at her place in France.

I’m so scarred by this memory I feel nauseous just thinking about it.

She put dried spaghetti in cold water and brought it to the boil, and if that wasn’t bad enough she rinsed it under a cold tap and left it to congeal in a colander. The ragù was made from minced beef and whole tinned tomatoes with onions and garlic and dried herbs. If it had been cooked very slowly for a very long time it might have been edible but it wasn’t. The cold naked pasta went on the plate, the meat sauce was ladled over it and dinner was served.

There was a period of 3 or 4 years just before my mum was diagnosed with fronto temporal dementia where she was still enthusiastic about cooking but it was horrendous. The first christmas of this period she'd made a lot of effort, but somehow the pastry for mince pies and sausage rolls could have been used as bullet proof armour and everything else was very under cooked or burnt. But she was totally oblivious to this.
But my worst meal was on a trip to Japan where I was taken by colleagues to a very traditional restaurant. The boiled pigs trotters were pretty bad, but the fertilised fish eggs where the fish embryos were wriggling round was just horrific. But I ate it still

I am sorry this happened to you, but I relate

Oooh, I have a story! It might be quite outing but it’s too good not to share. I once went to an event that had a sort of mad scientist theme, and the starter was a beaker full of light clear yellow soup (just imagine it. It looked like warm piss). The main meal had a sort of meat dish which came served with a syringe containing this white bread sauce thing in it which you had to squirt over the meat. I’ll let you imagine what that looked like … 😫

I was so hungry I cleaned out the mini bar in my room later, which I’ve never done before or since 😂

Lobster which gave me awful food poisoning.

Tarantula

An economy microwave meal lasagne. Was truly like cardboard in bechemel sauce and I threw it away.

An old boyfriend of mine from way back when made a pasta sauce for me once consisting of apple and orange. With sugar and grated cheese on top.

When DC1 was born it was a very slow delivery so I was in the delivery room for over 12 hours. They wouldn't allow me to eat anything (apparently this was standard policy) so I was starving. I'd not thought to take any food for me (we had snacks for DH, but after 12 hours he'd eaten them all). It was quite late at night by the time I was taken to the main maternity ward and DH was told he could not go out and bring food in for me, but that I shouldn't worry because they had a cold meal box for me. Having been assured that the food was vegetarian I took a big bite of what appeared (in my admittedly rather dazed state) to be cheese only to find that it was some sort of tinned fish. Which left me with a small orange (slightly dried up) and a small pack of cream crackers (not cheese or butter to out on them).

DC2 was born at home!

Cheesey pasta in my university catered accommodation that seemed to have been flavoured with cinnamon. I still think they must have chucked the wrong spice in. it didn't look bad but it tasted vile. The dining hall bins were very full that night.

porridge made with milk, honey, bananas, blueberries and a huge sprinkling of salt.

Actually that doesn’t sound so bad. Maybe a little less salt.

😂

Recently it was a lasagne from Zizzis, it was so insanely salty no one could have eaten it, and I like salty food! Sent it back.

Beetroot soup in Russia was disgusting. Pink greasy cold and lumpy.

Those cooked breakfasts you get in a can. No.

Anything my mum cooked for me ever really. She tried but it was always completely nuked and tasteless

One of the first meals i ever cooked for dh. The local thai shop didnt have my usual red curry paste, so i grabbed a different brand.

Started cooking, and added 2 tablespoons (as per instruction) of curry paste. Sauce didn't look red enough. Added more curry paste. Still not red enough. Added more, until eventually it was my desired colour of red.

Then somehow my rice turned out into overcooked mush. On this slop of rice i plated the worlds spiciest ever curry.

Dh very graciously tried to proclaim the meal was delicious, with sweat pouring off him as he made a valiant attempt at eating it.

I still cringe thinking about it now.

The Ragu I made yesterday! Used my usual recipe which is always lovely but it was like pink water with chunks in. No idea what happened but it went in the bin!

This, me and sister once had this in a service station type place in France thinking a sausage would be a safe bet, my sister swears to this days that she had an ear in hers 😂

Ahh @CMOTDibbler i hope you don’t mind but your story about your mum made me smile. I remember when my grandad was at a similar stage and I went to see him and he asked me if I’d like a cup of tea as he was making one for himself but in a new way. Intrigued (but terrified!) I politely declined and went to see what his ‘new tea’ was all about. It was a saucepan with water, teabags, whole garlic cloves and honey - he assured me it was full of goodness and preceded to drink 3 whole cups 😂

Salted cod in Lisbon. Absolutely vile. I filled up on rice and salad side dishes.

Liver, at school, aged 9 or 10. It somehow included elastic bands (1980). I had previously tried to make it clear that I didn't want to eat liver but the school had probably had enough of my picky eating (I tried to get out of their watery plum tomatoes and scrambled eggs too, and steak and kidney pudding because of the kidney).

On this occasion my gag reflex was too strong and I (r)ejected it at the dining table - so it was probably also the worst meal for the children sitting nearby too. I remember feeling pretty cheerful about it though (vindication!) and of course no-one ever tried to get me to eat liver again.

Jo

A meal my housemate once cooked. It was meatballs, but it was the cheapest possible meat she could find and they were flavourless chewy grey with giant bits of semi congealed fat, and the spaghetti tasted like it had been cooked in dishwater. I had to pretend I liked it very enthusiastically while trying not to gag or choke. Her and her mum thought it was great and that I wasn't enthusiastic enough.

On a trip with my Dad once and he bought tinned tripe for dinner and attempted to make us eat it. I think he just warmed it up, it looked and smelled liked dog food.

Had it in Bordeaux and horrendous

when i was very young, and my new boyfriend took me home to meet his mum.. and she made us fried liver with spagetti hoops and cheese squares... i was 16 and he was 23! he lived at home with his mother and she continued to live with us after we married!

we divored some 12/13 yers later, sadly his mother ended up with some issues and would be found wandering the streets at 4am in the morning in her dressing gown looking for a shop to buy cat food for a cat that passes away many years before!

That is terrible!! I would never speak to my friends again if they did that to me. Awful thing to do 🤬