I broke up with my ex at the beginning of the year due to emotional abuse. We have a 7 year old son together. The final straw was when we had an argument and he shoved me into a door frame after I found out he’d been lying to me and I tried to find out the truth. There was a long history of lies including him getting into serious debt without my knowledge, sex texting his ex, disappearing one night and making out that I was being oversensitive for finding out and getting super anxious about where he was (he said he slept at work and sent me a picture at his desk) and him getting into trouble with the police due to him hitting a dog whilst driving and driving off - and then not telling me until a month later when the police caught up with him. On top of that, he would frequently put me down, not let me cook and making me eat everything he made me, talking over me and generally being made out that I was the worst person in the world because I wasn’t any good at anything.
I left in March after being together for 10 years. We rented a house together and he told me to leave as I was the one that ended it. He has DS a few nights a week and every other weekend. He pretty much lets DS play on his tablet for 10 hours straight on a Sunday and they always get a takeaway. I moved to my parents which was about 5 miles away from ex’s house. DS goes to school around the corner from where ex’s house is. I moved in May this year about 9 miles north of where ex lives as I wanted a fresh start. It worked well at the time as DS school was on the way to work. I worked at this job for 1 1/2 years but wasn’t happy there, so looked for a job nearby. Unfortunately due to covenants in my contract (I couldn’t work at a competing firm for 6 months after leaving), my recruitment person put me forward for a job near where I live (which incidentally is in the same town as ex but the other side of the town), but the complete opposite direction to DS school. I ended up getting the job there and I love it. I leave for the school run about 8:15 in the morning, drive 9 miles to his school and then drive 16 miles to work (passing my house on the way).
I had a cry earlier as I’m feeling incredibly guilty and sad as I’ve been looking at schools for DS nearer to home. The schools I’ve looked at are en route for ex getting to work and would be better for after school club. Ex told me that he wasn’t going to agree to it as DS likes his school, despite the long journey and made out that I’m a bad parent for trying to change schools. My thinking was that it would help us make friends in the area and it would act as a feeder school for the secondary school in the local area (which is a better school to his current primary feeder). I’ve just started feeling like I’ve been really selfish and should just keep DS at his current school as I’m worried what ex will say. I’ve got a years contract where I’m currently living (and love it here), but feeling as though I should have found a rental near my ex’s (although there wasn’t anything on the market at the time) or not broken up with him. DS said last night that he wished we hadn’t split up and I’m feeling as though I should have stayed out for the sake of DS.