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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not go with partner to wedding?

29 replies

Waffle19 · 01/10/2024 20:58

Inspired by the post on MN currently around a person being invited to their wedding without a partner, I thought I’d get Mumsnetters views on going to a wedding by choice without a partner even though they’re invited!

Next July my partner’s cousin is getting married in Spain. We’re both invited but not our kids. Now no issue with the kids not being invited but it does mean we’d have to find childcare for them. We’d also be paying eye watering school holiday prices for flights and accommodation, and then wouldn’t be able to afford a holiday as a family.

Our suggestion is that my DP goes by himself and I stay at home with the kids. He can room share with a couple of mates so it will be cheaper and obviously only then paying the cost of one flight,

We are both equally happy with this decision. I’ve met his cousin twice in all the time we’ve been together (DP has only seen him twice in the same amount of time).

However DP’s parents and siblings think it’s weird that he would go to a wedding without me.

So who is being unreasonable?

YANBU - Stay at home and save the money, you’re not weird

YABU - PILs are right, suck up the cost and stop being a weirdo

(P.S We don’t really care what his parents or other people think, I was just curious for wider views after seeing the other thread tonight!)

OP posts:
SALaw · 07/10/2024 08:33

Not weird at all, a totally practical solution

AntiHop · 07/10/2024 08:33

I would stay at home with the kids.

Spidey66 · 07/10/2024 08:38

It's fine. A cousin of mine got married a few months before lockdown. We were invited, but we ended up getting a new puppy a few weeks before, and felt she was too small to go into kennels or be looked after by someone else so I went on my own. Of course people asked where he was but the explanation was accepted.

Janus · 08/10/2024 07:54

Totally fine, stay at home. My husband was best man at a wedding to a couple I knew well too but it was in the Caribbean and we had 3 small children so he went on his own! I just couldn’t ask anyone to look after them for that amount of time, and cats and dogs, my family lives 4 hours away and my dad worked and mum doesn’t drive so it was just impossible. I’m so glad my husband went though.

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