Who is being unreasonable?

[4405cd]

So a friend sends dates to other friend for a potential catch up for following week . Friend doesn’t reply due to being busy ,so the other friend makes other arrangements . Am wondering if the friend who tried to arrange should have informed other friend when she made alternative plans , or should friend have responded in an appropriate time ? YABU give friend more time and not make alternative plan ,YANBU…friend should have replied to confirm a date .
New to MN so cannot work out the voting system !!

You didn't put voting options.

It depends how long friend took to reply. More than a day or two and first friend is fully entitled to open those slots up to others.

Too busy to press a few letters on their phone?

No, I wouldn't be informing them of my plans.

So friend A sends B an invite to meet up a few days later. B didn’t reply, so A made other plans?

Guessing B is annoyed because A made other plans but B was actually free to meet A.

Hiw long did A wait before making other plans? Five minutes? An hour? The next day? Context is everything.

depends if friend who didn’t respond has form for not replying for days on end. That shit gets a bit tedious after a while.

I’d make other plans and not say, very very rude to not respond. And the excuse of I was busy is shit. Everyone has a a min to read check and respond.

Friend responded a week later on the day that other friend had suggested the date.

B is completely and utterly unreasonable then

How about just posting the full context? So boring when OP just write one sentence at a time in response to other posters questions 🙄 no one want to read through a hundred posts to piece together the actual event!

In that case, B is completely unreasonable. How rude.

So I fancy doing something next Sunday, and ask my mate, but hear nothing back.
You "My friend" is now cross because, having not heard anything, I decide to do something else ?

Of course I was entitled to go off and do something else, and no, of course I don't need to 'inform her' of what I am doing. "My friend" wasn't interested.

B is
Sounds like they are a keeping options open type who then got snotty because their friend did something else
Tough

I gave context but didn’t want to influence replies. Absolutely not necessary to be rude!

Friend B is rude, they weren't too busy to sent a quick text for an entire week.

Friend A needs to stop contacting B to try to arrange anything. They are too rude to respond, A should just live their life and ignore B.

If the person didn't respond shoulthe other put thier life on hold waiting?

Of course they. Made other plans

Yes that’s what I thought ,but interested to see if I was being unreasonable.

I think B is completely unreasonable. If she has forgotten or been too busy to respond, then it happens, but it is her problem, not A's.

B needs to apologise to A for being flaky and take the lead in planning the next meet up. She should not get arsy when she was the one who dropped the ball.

B is definitely the unreasonable one - they can’t expect friend A to just with the date free whilst B makes up her mind. It does sound like B was keeping options open in case she got a better offer. Very rude of B!

Thank you . You have validated my thoughts. I was actually questioning whether I should have just kept all the dates free…I have many close friends and I always reply and confirm as soon as I get a chance.

no you didn’t give full context you gave the bare minimum.

Either way though your friend is rude!

I gave the scenario..sorry if it was not detailed enough! I tried to keep neutral with my OP .

I wasn't sure initially, because if it's like
"Hi, fancy a coffee at the Costa after work later?

• no reply so went straight home instead

I wouldn't think anyone was rude. It's just one of those things.

But given that there was no reply for a whole week, that's just blatant rude. I'd reconsider wanting to arrange anything else in future!

^ there's a random bullet point I didn't put that in myself

Haven't read the full thread but when you send a number of dates to another person I don't think there's an implication or obligation to keep those dates free for a period of time and if the other person takes their time to respond then they might find the first person is not free any more