To think this isn’t ok in a marriage?

[Greeal]

DH left his phone open on WhatsApp to a woman he used to go to school with (now late thirties). The phone must have slipped from his pocket as he got out of the car when going into the shop. I glanced over and saw his last message which said ‘your profile pic is hot ;) .’

The messages prior were him saying he had seen her yesterday in town but she hadn’t seen him. She said oh sorry she hadn’t seen him. He then made the comment about her profile picture being hot. She hadn’t replied.

I don’t think this is ok but we have two kids under three and I am very stressed at the moment and wonder if maybe I am being dramatic? No evidence or suspicion of anything before so this has totally taken me by surprise. He often leaves his phone around and clearly wasn’t worried about keeping tabs on it either. If confronted I think he would apologise profusely and expect that to be the end of it. I feel angry/upset.

Agree with he is testing the waters.

Sorry.

That’s pretty bad. Just the wording - ‘hot’ I mean, really. That’s hitting on someone language, not casual ‘saw you out and about, how are you’ language.
I think you need to confront DH.

Not acceptable. Only way it would be is if her profile pic was of her dog or cat or something and it was said in sarcasm but I’m guessing it is a pic of her.

Nor acceptable. Think carefully about how to proceed, do you want to talk now or wait to see if it gets worse?
What is your financial situation? What would life be like if you split up? If he cheated? Think it all through then talk to him when you have your head clear, but his behaviour is not OK.

Unless the photo is of her sweating profusely then referring to her as looking hot is a line crossed.

He's already checked out of your relationship and is sniffing around other women's skirts starting with someone he already has a connection with.