To not take full bereavement leave?

[MelMar1]

I’m a teacher and our school offers 5 days for a bereavement of a grandparent, which unfortunately has occurred for me. AIBU to think I should go back sooner than five days, because that is the maximum? Or is it acceptable to take what is offered? I hate this teacher guilt at a time when I’m already so upset.

Take what you need!

It's a tough time, if your colleague was off for the same reason - you'd have nothing but sympathy. Screw the guilt, offer yourself the same kindness you'd show someone else going through the same situation.

Take it for sure, 100%.

I didn't have any bereavement leave when my grandparents died.

The first died when I was a a teenager (during the school holidays). I was working when the other three died and no doubt could have taken some time, but - much as I loved them (one in particular) they were all in their mid 90s and I didn't feel the need to take any time off except to attend their funerals.

Utterly down to you,kind of depends on how you are feeling! My gp’ s were all expected deaths of very elderly people whereas for other people their gp’s were like a second set of parents.

Depends how you feel. That's very generous.

Totally up to you. I didn’t take any when my grandma died earlier this year. I was offered 5 days when dd died a few years ago, thank goodness workplaces are more compassionate now.

Do you need/want 3 now and 2 for the funeral (day before and day of?) to support your parents? I don't know if that's an option but that would probably be what I would do if I were you.

Actual businesses offer 1-2 days -if you get offered 5 you are lucky .
Taxpayers are paying for it .

Gosh that is generous! I had one day for each of my grandparents, to attend their funeral. Take what you think you need, but like you, I’d probably be wanting to get back sooner if I felt up to it.

5 days is pretty generous so I'd take 5 days if I needed 5 days but go back sooner if you can

I'd take off as much time as you feel you need.
It's just a job at the end of the day and your family and you are more important.

What do you mean by tax payers are paying for it? So if someone is finding it very hard they shouldn't take the time?
We get 1 day for immediate family at my school, parents, siblings or children no one else. I was very close to my grandparents and had to take unpaid leave. So no, tax payers are not paying for it in every instance

Was that really necessary?

Take it my lovely x

Take it. I would have killed for leave to go to my grandfathers funeral and cremation when he died abroad

Happy to pay for someone to get adequate bereavement leave.

Take what you need, OP. Sorry for your loss

I'm a teacher. We don't have this. It's usually only 1 day paid for a close relative, anything else unpaid and with SLT discussion.
I had 3 days when my Mum died, 1 day for my Dad, the day of the funeral.
If your school is in a position to offer this, it's your choice to take it or not, I would imagine.

Sorry for your loss. I’m a teacher and if 5 days is standard that’s amazing. It depends how you feel. I wouldn’t take 5 days just because I could. You’ll need to request a day off for the funeral as well.

If you need it, take it. When each of my grandparents died, I used a day of it for their funerals but I didn't feel like I needed any more than that. But if I had, I would have taken it.

Take what you need (just remember to leave a day for the funeral)

If you would feel better being at school and working, then take less. The school are being more generous than many would be.

Jesus wept.

So businesses have never been subsidised by taxpayers? Or recieved nice handouts from the tax payers?

Five days for a bereavement isn't ridiculous. Teachers aren't robots.

Maybe three days now then two days for the funeral?

OP, are these 5 days on full pay? I'm only asking because that may be a factor in your decision.

I agree that you might want to save some of the days for the funeral. I work for a Council and I think the policy is two days for close family members i.e. partner or child. I think most people just get a sick note and have as long as they feel they need though.

For me the question would be how are you? How are you functioning? Grandparents can be anything between someone that brought you up when your parent's couldn't, to someone you visit once a year or not at all.