Just that, really.
In my entire office-based career, I can’t say I have encountered a colleague this odd. I dealt with a grumpy colleague, the one who was always late, an entitled younger one, an aggressive one, and a passive-aggressive one, but this guy I can’t work out, and it annoys me beyond what is normally acceptable.
We are both at senior level and must work together, albeit in different departments. Let’s preface it by saying that he’s a normal middle-aged, introverted individual. However, with me, he’s either super intense—coming to my desk, confiding about all sorts of stuff that you would share only with your close friends, praising me, and then bam, we will go through a period of him ignoring me/no contact and not even a hello.
At first, I thought, "Okay, this is a bit odd, but who cares?" But over the years, I have become increasingly frustrated with it. It’s hot and cold, nonstop.
I get it. This is not about me; this is how he is, but I notice he’s not like this with others. I have started to ignore him these days as this is interfering with my work, but then this makes him want to come to talk to me more.
It’s bothering me that I am thinking about this a lot and getting annoyed with myself. When he’s “friendly”, he’s my best ally at work - he will praise me, praise me with others, we work harmoniously, he will help so much, then bam, long periods of ignoring me. I thought, well, maybe he’s busy, so he’s focusing on work, but nope… I tried to bring this up, but he was - oh, you are one of the only people I even talk to here.
Has anyone been in a similar situation, and what did you do to stop this nonsense? I don’t understand how I got myself into this situation or why I am so annoyed by this individual.