To find this a bit rude?

[MelodyMalone]

Recently I was getting my nails done, and another woman in the salon was watching a film on her iPad for the duration of her manicure, ignoring the woman who was doing her nails.

Today I was at the hairdresser and the woman beside me was on her phone (Facebook I think) the whole time she was getting her hair washed.

Is this a normal thing? To me it feels disrespectful to just ignore the human being who's carrying out the service in favour of watching a movie or browsing on your phone. It's not something I'd feel at all comfortable doing.

Really curious as to whether it's a normal thing people do.

I always do the hello, how's it been chitchat, then I go on my phone. As an introvert, I do not have the ability to find conversation topics to fulfill a 3 hour appointment. I can't even talk to friends that long, and there's only so much "are you going anywhere nice" I can spin.

Not for nails though, can't use phone when having nails done, that one just sees me sitting quietly.

Yes, I get it for a 3 hour appointment!

My hair takes about 2 hours but a lot of that is sitting waiting for the colour to develop. I certainly read or look at my phone then, but not while the hairdresser's actually there.

Im also an introvert 😄

The people at the nail salon never speak to me and almost treat their customers with contempt (I use a Cantonese staffed salon). Sometimes it’s awkward and I am quite chatty so will ask about them to be met with very pointed answers.

I also think it’s your treatment so whatever suits you.

As long as you do a polite greeting at the start I don't think it's an issue. You are paying for a service and you aren't the service providers entertainment.

I'm an introvert, having small talk with a stranger fills me with dread so no not rude.

It's a service for the client. Not the professional
And for some that time doing self care is scared.
It could be the only time that they get to themselves to decompress.

I mean, if we chatting about something it's different, a recent or upcoming event or holiday, but the lulls... I do go on the phone, sometimes checking mails or teams messages etc. Just to divert to make the silence not so loud..

Some salons offer silent treatments so you don't feel you have to talk. I know it would be a nice rest for the beautician/hairdresser having done the job!
Everyone is different and you learn that very quickly in that type of role. It's not seen as rude. For some people it's their me time and they don't want to spend that time talking.

I hate chitchat. Hate it, hate it, hate it. Getting my hair done takes at least six hours and I generally take a book. Otherwise, I’d be on my phone. Most people seem to do the same.

Ditto pedicures. One of the reasons I don’t get manicures is the fact that I wouldn’t be able to read. Watching something on my iPad never occurred to me, but good shout.

We’re paying for a service. I’m not going to make said service considerably less pleasant for myself by engaging with people I don’t know about stuff I don’t care about.

if they were dismissive in general and the watching of something then thats rude, but otherwise I agree with PP that it's fine. Small talk can be hard for an extended period. I treated myself to really fancy nail art for my birthday this year (3hr appointment rather than 1hr15min for single colour) and I asked if she minded whether read and she had no problem with it - said she actually finds it easier to focus on intricate designs when she isn't talking.

I wouldn’t go to a hairdresser that I had to make three hours of small talk with every month. I’d rather have awful hair.

I’ve dodged haircuts for YEARS because of their incessant questions/chatter.

It’s makes me anxious just thinking about it.

I’m glad the tide is turning.

Fair enough, I'm probably overthinking it 😄

I don't feel I have to chat all the time. But the watching a film did feel a bit off to me. Probably just because it's not something I would feel comfortable doing.

It's not self-care if I am expected to chat to my hairdresser for the best part of two hours. I say hello, ask how she is. She says fine, how have you been. Then gives me hot chocolate for no charge.

I've been paying her for over a decade. We understand each other.

I will add that I think it depends a bit on frequency. I have really irregular hair cuts, once or twice a year and don't struggle with chatting then. But with my nails it's every 4 weeks, and my life really isn't that exciting!

Not suggesting nonstop small talk btw. Although I do quite like hearing about what my hairdresser's been getting up to over the past six weeks 😄

I'm pretty sure many of the service providers will be glad of the chance to focus on their work rather than on trying to think of things to talk about.

I find it infuriating when people don’t use headphones to listen to their phone ! Or they are having a full on conversation in the nail bar! I go once a month to escape and I want To say- turn your bloody phone off and shut up ! I don’t want to hear you talking crap!

It's fine.

thanks, interesting to hear opinions.

I don't feel I have to chat all the time. But I also wouldn't feel comfortable watching a film while someone was doing my nails, as I'd feel I was ignoring them completely and I'd feel that was rude. But clearly everyone has a different level of what's comfortable for them and I'm sure hairdressers, beauticians etc are used to all sorts.

My hairdresser seems to gauge whether the customer wants to chat or not, which is perfect. I'm sure they sometimes welcome the chance to just concentrate on what they're doing and not chat.
I've also noticed they don't ask what work people do as people might want to switch off from work at the hairdresser.

I’m an introvert, I don’t like to chat all the time but I think it is rude to be watching a movie or be constantly on the phone in that situation and if headphones weren’t involved I would be livid.

Interestingly I wouldn’t think reading a book (if possible) in the same situation was rude.

But also I only visit a hairdresser when I absolutely have to and have never had my nails done so it’s not a situation I put myself in frequently.

totally normal imo. I hate chatting at the hairdresser. It's my me time and I just use it to relax.