PlayStations VS food

[Createcreate23]

I have a friend let’s call her Mary, we both have 3 kids. Once a week I take her shopping to the big Asda or tesco as she does not drive.

now I know the next part is judgy and I have me hard hat on 🤣

the last few weeks she has been cutting down on her food shop and mainly buying the Asda basic chicken nuggets / pizza etc the yellow packet ones which I know can be a life saver in people who can’t afford more expensive food.
I asked if everything was ok in which she replied oh just making some cut backs cost of living and all that, got Xmas and birthdays approaching.

they yesterday I was going to the large Smyths as it’s one of my DC birthday soon. She asked if she could come as she needed to sort at least 1 of the dc Xmas this month.

anyway it transpired that each of her 3 boys want a ps5 for Xmas ( not shared ) plus games and controllers. I was surprised at the 2k plus price tag it would cost. She then laughed and said now you see why we cut back the food shop.
now it’s her life but do people really cut back providing decent food to supply consoles ?

A console each if they all live under the same roof is ridiculous! Why can they not share?!

I personally find that excessive but everyone has different priorities. I don't think it is that unusual to save up for Christmas presents, if that means cutting back on the food shop then fair enough. You can still create balanced meals with low cost ingredients. I think the most worry things that comes out of this is how much pressure parents are under to buy the latest tech thing, whether that's an iPhone, tablet or playstation. Expensive things like that weren't expected 20 years ago. For Christmas we'd get a pogo stick or a skateboard, a few books, maybe a soft toy, some toiletries and a board game to share and that was more than enough!

Im not going to judge that mum for her choices. Maybe she is only telling part of the story?

Very excessive. I wouldn’t be buying them one each, but guess she is prioritising that.

Playstation first came out thirty years ago, so I don't think we were all having ye olde Christmas with an orange and a colouring book twenty years ago.

You're maybe thinking of the 50s, even in the 80s and 90s there was pressure to get the big expensive cool thing for Christmas, whether that was tech or not.

OP, better to cut back than get into debt I guess! Maybe she can't stand the arguments that would come with sharing consoles.

She isn’t choosing PlayStations over food. That’s nonsense.

She’s buying budget options to feed her family in the run up to Christmas. The basics range isn’t “for emergencies,” OP.

Which gifts she buys and how much she spends is her own business.

I think good for her she's trying to give her kids the things they want for Christmas. You can't share a console they will all probably want to play together and split screen is a thing of the past now every game is online multiplayer. She's making sacrifices so they can have what they want and don't go hungry. I think it's none of your business and you shouldn't be judging a mother doing the best she can. Bit arseholey of you to be so judgmental if you ask me.

Oh no not the yellow food packets what a scumbag. The level of privilege on this site sometimes astounds me.

I'm talking about my own childhood and I'm definitely not that old (29). Even though consoles came out 30 years ago that didn't mean they were expected - at least in my circles. More of my friends didn't have a console than did. I remember going to play at a friend's house who had a playstation (there were six of us gathered around the same one). My post to the OP was to highlight that parents are under more pressure to keep up with tech, especially as it is progressing so fast. I've lost track of how many iPhone models there are now. When I was a teenager everyone was raging about the Sony walkman phone, or blackberries and they definitely didn't cost £2000, even adjusting for inflation.

If the kids are old enough for PS5, they are old enough to know they are expensive

How do you know a conservation hasn't taken place along the lines of "no other presents, cutting back on brands and trears) etc?

We had a similar conversation last year with ours, but opposite... less presents to pay for the various school trips, scout camps, rugby tours etc.

Lol the yellow packaging food items are just normal food!- I buy them. Not because it's 'a lifesaver,' but because its good value and I want to.
Your friend sounds like she's being quite organised to me.. budgeting accordingly and getting her 'big presents ' in, whilst she has a lift and it's only September! Good for her.
I think you'd have different reactions to this post if it was a case of your friend having no food, spending on credit cards, asking you for food, going to food banks- and then buying 3 playstations. But, as it is, she sounds perfectly reasonable.
3 playstations wouldn't work for me, they'd have to share.- and don't have 3 televisions,a But, we're not all the same. If she has an 8 year old and a 16 year old, to be fair, they'll need very different games!

I think it's unnecessary to have a ps5 each but that's just my opinion.

What's a yellow food packet? I'm assuming it's the supermarket value range.

Whilst I wouldn't buy three Playstations, yes I would economise on food to finance other aspects of my life. I could shop every week in Waitrose or M&S but instead I shop in Aldi so we can go on holiday and buy presents. To some people who value food quality over holidays and presents that might seem like a strange choice but I think it is a fairly mainstream choice these days. Would you think the same of her if she was saving up to spend £6000 on a holiday somewhere or is the the decision to buy three Playstations that you are questioning?

People have different priorities but it's natural to question other people's and I think it's an interesting thing to discuss.

I understand budgeting ahead of Xmas but I can't believe what some people spend on their kids when they still have mortgages etc to pay off. I think it can set kids up for disappointment (and potentially lots of debt) later to give them too much when they're young so I try and be a bit modest in our lifestyles and gift-giving for this reason.

Well, yeah. A PlayStation doesn’t cost 2k either. But three PlayStations do. For comparison, the cheapest iPhone (because you said blackberry and this is the zeitgeist equivalent) is £429. The cheapest PlayStation is £389. Throw in three copies a game or buy bundles instead of just the console and suddenly you’re at £2k.

The trouble with having three older kids is that their window for playing is so narrow. After school, activities, homework and anything else, then you get 1/3rd of a PlayStation to bicker over and hope that your friend will be able to hop on theirs to play with you during that narrow window of opportunity? For a lot of gamers (looking at the teenage boy demographic) we’re past the stage of “save your game, it’s time for dinner.” Game events happen in real time, and online games last until the time/game is over.

I, personally, wouldn’t buy three PlayStations, but I absolutely see where she’s coming from.

On the off chance that this is true and not some made up bs to get the "anything more than a satsuma, a book voucher, and some new socks is frivolous." Brigade out this morning..

Do you seriously believe her kids will be comforted by the fact they don't have what they want because they've been eating birds eye nuggets?

Anyway, I hope she continues to buy cheap crap and puts the money to driving lessons so she can ditch your judgy arse.

She is doing what she can to make her children happy in a way she feels is best. Other than telling her good luck I wouldn't think twice about it let alone start a thread here about it.

Does one household need three playstations? probably not. I know nothing about her though so I am not going to judge. Maybe her children are all at awkward ages and won't play the same games, maybe they don't share space well or get on well. I can see how one playstation between three could cause issues then if you buy two to try and minimize issues one will end up left out.

I can see where she's coming from and as long as she isn't getting into debt then I don't think it's a massive problem.
If you have 3 consoles there will be fewer arguments and they can even play together (they will probably play with their own sets of friends though). It would be practically impossible to share between 3.
Mine spent summer up the park playing football, but now it's pissing down with rain and getting dark. Especially for boys this is how they socialise in the winter now. It's a myth that they just sit on their own becoming more solitary, all I hear is constant chat and laughter.

My children have a console each, but my eldest has a learning disability and won't share his. Maybe similar type of thing?

Regardless of that you ARE being judgey. She's budgeting, hardly starving herself & her kids. That's normal parenting?

Haha I can just imagine 3 teenage boys sharing a PS5, not going to happen! 😂

I wouldn't buy presents that cost £2000 (well, who knows what I'll do in a few years if the kids ask nicely...) but I don't think buying the cheaper range is choosing presents over food. I'm not convinced a yellow sticker Asda pizza is nutritionally worse than waitrose's finest pizza. It makes sense not to shell out for brand names unnecessarily.

Also 3 ps5 cost £1.200 she can get them to share a ps5 account and they can share games & play them at the same time. (We do this) so probably not as expensive as you judge!

Assuming OP's friend has teens (if she has younger children, then yes, ridiculous), it's not really practical to share. They will all want to be using it at the same time.

I don't think the cost of a PS5 is ridiculous for a teenager's Christmas present if it's affordable for the family and it's what they really want. I would perhaps be making them joint Christmas/birthday presents and/or asking the DC to contribute themselves if they had part time jobs. People do budget to afford Christmas presents. OP has only noticed because her friend has only started saving recently. If she'd bought the same level of food all year round, it wouldn't have been noticed.

Mine used to share an account but it doesn't really work as they play online with friends, want to save their progress etc. we've evolved to them all having one, sometimes gifted, we were given a second hand one, one saved up - it's much easier and they can also watch Netflix/prime separately

My two each have their own consoles, switches and gaming laptops. The idea of them sharing them is a nightmare frankly. I buy quite a few things from the Asda cheap range too, it's good value.

Why do you refer to this woman as a friend, OP? That's really odd. You're so judgemental about her choices which have absolutely nothing to do with you.

You missed a trick (as PP suggested) by not saying that all the spending was on credit cards, yada yada. You could have really rubbed your thighs at the responses then. Ugh.

Poor effort. This thread and your friendship. Do your friend a favour, tell her that you post about her made up situation online and see if she still gives you the time of day. I wouldn't.