To ask for your very late talker success stories?

[YoucancallmeBettyDraper]

I don’t know if I’m being foolish to hope. My child is nearly 2 1/2 and basically non-verbal, and probably autistic. I’d love to hear stories of children that talked very late, especially autistic children. I mean are able to hold a conversation.

I just need to counter my feeling that my child will never speak to me, which is my dominant fear at the moment and which feels inevitable.

Thanks in advance

Autistic tooooooooo

My sons only really stared talking properly last few weeks. Incredible how quick it changes! He’s 2 and a half.

About a month ago nursery were about to refer him for being mute whilst there. He babbled in gobblegoock at home but I don’t think they believed us.

Tbh though I was never worried. His understanding has always been excellent. I knew he was delayed but that he would get there eventually.

My eldest didn't talk until he was 3ish and just the odd word, no sentences. He has always struggled to communicate (he is now 13 and still makes little noises at us in preference to speaking) HOWEVER he can and does speak normally, particularly at school.

He is not a chatterbox at all, and often stumbles over his words. He is thriving academically though and we all found it very funny when his teacher last year wrote that he has excellent communication skills in his report.

Another big worry were his social skills. Despite his total lack of chattiness, he is popular and has made a good group of friends. We're still not entirely sure how...

(He has ADHD and dyspraxia and is a wonderful son).

Einstein didn't talk til he was 4, and he was reasonably successful.

Relative of mine didn't say a word til he was 2 then apparently came out with a full sentence. Suspect he has ASD but never assessed, now retired following good career, always been very athletic, happy family of his own & now a bustling social life.

I'm one. First word at 3.5 years old. Reading fluently by 4 and in mainstream school at 4.5 (summer born).

Glue ear can make a massive difference to kids starting to speak. It wasn't until mine was sorted that things changed. Up until then I was using my own made up signs.

Non-native mother of a summer born here.

At 4 he didn’t say a word in either language and was in nappies, so I deferred him out of my own idea (nursery didn’t even know it was a thing), got him an EHCP and scrapped the home language. Got assessed for ASD by the NHS.

At 5 he attended reception in a speech and language resource base.

At 7 he doesn’t shut up for a moment. English only but who cares!

One of my nephews didn’t utter a word until far gone 2.5. And then, once he did, he just accelerated rapidly and was speaking sentences in a few months at 3.
He has a brother 1.5 years older than him, who actually spoke very early (around 12months) and would often “speak for” his younger brother. It was only when the older one went to nursery and my sister had more one to one time with the younger one, he started to gain confidence and talk. He is not Autistic or ASD but even now, is quite a shy and quiet child, though when you catch him alone on a topic he loves, he will chat enthusiastically (now preteen).

According to my MIL my BIL did not say a word until he turned 3. Then one day he opened his mouth and started talking in very clear sentences and hasn’t stopped since. He’s also not autistic, just a late talker.

One of mine didn't start talking properly until closer to 3, I was quite worried about it but the GP said that the chance he grows to adulthood without talking is almost 0, he is now almost 4 and chats away and makes lots of hilarious jokes

My friends autistic DD is 6 in a week or so and still doesn’t say a single word, just babbles. Has anyone had experience of kids talking later than 6? Friend is very worried that she may never talk. She hasn’t even had any speech therapy as yet, long waiting list for a formal diagnosis and a location move (and another one coming up) hasn’t helped.

No autism but my now nearly 5 year old is nearly caught up to where she should be. Could hardly understand her at 3, no sentences until nearly 4.

My eldest was literally non verbal at 2 and half years old. She was under SALT up until she was 7 and was behind in all areas at school. There was a lot of communication from professionals who suggested she may be neurodivergent. Something happened when she turned 8 and she caught up with her speech, and and now at 13 she is in set one for everything. I still can't overly explain the what or why but her development didn't follow the normal trajectory.

My son could only say a few words at that age, certainly couldn’t put a sentence together.

Hes now nearly 8 and has had extensive speech therapy but his speech is brilliant. He has a bit of a lisp but he doesn’t ever stop talking! And has the most incredible vocabulary. Also autistic with other complex needs. But his verbal communication was assessed at being about 12yo.

Our daughter is 3 and has consistently been assessed as probable for autism. Just a few weeks ago she was non-verbal with limited eye contact. Once she made a start on mummee daddee her language exploded in the same way we have seen in our NT child.

Maybe it is just the right time for her, but I think what made the difference was finding an autism-experienced childminder who has been phenomenal. We don't get SALT, there is nothing for pre-school children, and yet this is such a key time developmentally. It's no wonder that SEN children are struggling in school when they are just left to get on with it till then.

It is shocking. We have had to go private, and we can’t really afford it. The new government needs to urgently pump funding into SEN. It’s so depressing to see other countries with amazing early intervention programmes for toddlers when we have nothing. As you say it’s such a crucial time. I’m so glad your little girl is making such progress now!

This is a fabulous idea. Thank you!

So, I answered a little flippantly! But I also do this sort of things as a job and the previous poster is right, they all follow their own trajectories. My DS learnt to speak (as with all the children on this thread) because he developed the capacity to speak. That was just luck really.

Once a child is in a window in which that development is possible, you can absolutely do lots of work to bring the speech on. Intensive interaction work. Commentate on what they are doing rather than ask questions, offer choices, talk and read to them a lot. However, if a child is not going to speak, none of the above will make them speak. It may make them progress in other areas or teach them to communicate in other ways though. It's like trying to teach a newborn baby to potty train, you can be the best potty trainer in the world but it still won't happen.

I don't say this to depress you, because in fact the majority of non talkers at 2, will talk. That's why this thread has so many examples of non talkers who talked. Your son is only 2.5, he has so much time to grow and develop. But I hope saying this helps to take the pressure off you, that feeling that you should always be doing more to bring your child along. Much of it is out of your hands. Go along to speech and language therapy, do the techniques that they recommend and see what happens.

The uncertainty is really difficult but I remember struggling to really enjoy my son because I was so concerned about him. I look back on videos and he was so cute but I was just worried about what he wasn't doing! I wish I had relaxed and enjoyed him more, but it's easy to say with hindsight.

Thank you. That does help, actually. I was blaming myself for letting him watch television from quite a young age. (A limited amount and very carefully chosen programmes.) My mother pointed out that there are children who grow up in very neglectful environments with constant screens who still develop speech, albeit it’s not great for them.

We have autism in the family (severe) and a relative said the same thing - that they regret not taking more enjoyment in their child at the time. I am making a conscious effort to do this by limiting how much time I’m allowed to worry each day.

I sense an intelligence and a desire to communicate in my child that is beyond their “output” right now, so there is grounds for hope.

My daughter was very late talking - once started, she has not stopped since. Not autistic, although possibly ADHD. Graduated with a First, now bilingual

DS3 didn't talk until he was about 4 & then it was just short phrases and pretty much only comprehensible to those who knew him. He had his own words for things that didn't sound much like the correct word. He had speech & language therapy & was statements (old Code of Practice) for speech language & communication disorder. Honestly, he's 29 now & you can't shut him up! He has the gift of the gab & works very successfully as an estate agent.
I hope you have a similar success story.

Sorry should read: "statemented"

MiL once told me that eldest BiL (now over 80) barely uttered at all until he was 3. She had been getting very worried, but once he started, it came out in whole sentences - he’d just been taking it all in and biding his time.
He eventually went on to win a scholarship to Cambridge.

My now 19yr old autistic son didn't speak until he was 10. There is hope.

My brother isn't autistic but didn't speak until he was over 3. He hasn't shut up since.
I get your fears. My DS is 4, probably autistic and he doesn't really speak but in the last few months he has actually said a few words mummy, daddy, no and strangely giddy up. So no proper conversation but he does use the words in context.
Both my DDs were late speaking too, one is autistic, one is NT. Both were almost 3 before they started talking but both are certainly capable of holding a conversation (or arguement).

My DD2. She’s only 5.5 now so not grown up yet but at 2.5, she had no words, tantrums because can’t communicate her needs, always in her own world, will smile only a few times to just me and dad, no gestures like pointing, stims, etc. We got a private speech therapist because we were just been fobbed off by the HV and I cried after reading the first report the therapist wrote because it was accurate but painted a bleak future so got Pecs, etc. Just to add, she had very minimal screen time.
We changed her from the childminder to a nursery because the nursery had a reputation of getting services for children.
At 3, she started saying some words, and then chunks of words that may not apply to the situation so maybe something she heard in the morning and she just repeats it later, she was diagnosed with ASD and then finally got to see the NHS salt and they told us she’s a gestalt language processor.
I’ve never heard of that till then so we started researching what it is and applying these interventions to her, dh is an occupational therapist but he took some speech therapy courses in that time as well. We stopped using pecs and in the space of 1.5 years, she can now talk in sentences, can ask for things, she can’t narrate what’s happened in school for example but we can ask questions that she’ll answer yes or no to. The tantrums has almost stopped because she now speaks even though they are sometimes single words but can pass across the message. Now to the best part, she can read so well, learnt phonics in reception (mainstream school and has 1 to 1 based on her ehcp) and since then applies it to books she’s reading. She’s learning to speak more now from reading and now has extensive vocabulary. We get picture books from the library with sentences and if there are difficult words, we describe or act it out for her to understand what it means as much as we can and this has made such a difference in the last one year. She still stims though.
At 2.5, if someone had told me that we’ll be here then I’ll say that’s not possible. Ofcourse all children are different but take any opportunities you’re given and if you can afford it, get private salt till you can get one on the NHS as well.