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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have given my opinion?

12 replies

madeittheway · 22/09/2024 21:55

I’ve recently read a book I was looking forward to it being released. It was baaaad, very disappointing.

I looked up reviews on TikTok to see if it’s just me. I commented on one review with my opinion and the poster went crazy. Said it’s not “booktok” etiquette to disagree with a review and I wasn’t being kind.

Aibu? Surely if you post a review on a public forum then you need to accept people will comment?

OP posts:
comedycentral · 22/09/2024 21:58

Oh dear, you were mobbed by the be kind brigade which means you can't have an opinion! You might be best on a dedicated book group forum for proper book critique.

zaxxon · 22/09/2024 23:10

Was it Intermezzo?

I don't have TikTok but generally I'd say you'd be better off posting your own solo review, rather than posting what might be taken as a critique of another person's review.

Changeyourfuckingcar · 23/09/2024 07:38

‘I wasn’t being kind’ 🤢 to be honest I think it could be taken that you were criticising the review more than perhaps the book, as above, but equally I think if you’re posting a public opinion on something so open to interpretation as a book, you have to expect that’ll draw other opinions. Booktok is such an echo chamber sometimes, I read a lotttt and some of it is more on the booktok/trashy side and some of the most hyped books have been the most disappointing!

Woahtherehoney · 23/09/2024 07:40

Booktok is unreal, I don’t engage with it much anymore and I LOVE books and reading.

The videos are mostly about book collections, pretty covers and ‘tropes’ and what most people don’t realise is you can’t reduce a book to just one trope - unless it’s a book just centred around that and then it’s not a great book really!

Agix · 23/09/2024 07:44

Think this hinges on how you worded your commentmostly. Tbf is a bit weird that you thought a good place for your negative review was the comment section of someone's video giving a positive review. It does a tiny bit seem like you're targeting the person who made a good review, rather than the book, by doing that.

toastofthetown · 23/09/2024 07:54

Honestly, it’s pretty strange to decide the place for your negative review is someone else’s positive one (on social media rather than a newspaper write up). Not sure about Booktok etiquette as I generally avoid it, but if someone gave a book 5 stars on Goodreads, I wouldn’t reply to that review saying I thought the book was tripe. If I wanted to comment I’d start my own review or reply to a 1/2 star review. I see it as similar to as if a friend loves a book I hated, I wouldn’t go out of my way to talk about it, and I’d just make a vague comment about how it wasn’t my cup of tea, than start about everything the book did wrong in my opinion.

GreyCarpet · 23/09/2024 08:00

'Be kind' now means you're not allowed to have an opinion that might hurt someone else's feelings or 'invalidate' them in some way by being different to theirs 🙄

It's tedious.

In your shoes, I would have a) left a separate review so someone with a fragile ego didn't take a difference of opinion as a personal attack or b) not left a review at all. Not everything needs to go onto SM.

I have no idea about 'booktok' etiquette. Until this thread, I was completely unaware of the existence of 'booktok'.

ABirdsEyeView · 23/09/2024 10:12

Never heard of booktok but imo a review posted online is an invitation to comment. Otherwise they might as well keep their opinion in their own head.

Original poster
madeittheway · 23/09/2024 18:03

Agix · 23/09/2024 07:44

Think this hinges on how you worded your commentmostly. Tbf is a bit weird that you thought a good place for your negative review was the comment section of someone's video giving a positive review. It does a tiny bit seem like you're targeting the person who made a good review, rather than the book, by doing that.

No, I just used search on tiktok for “a review” - good, bad or a mixture of both.

I didn’t say - you are wrong and I am right, I just commented that personally I didn’t like it for xyz. I didn’t think it would particularly offend anyone because I didn’t say they were wrong or rip apart what they said and they didn’t write the book.

OP posts:
ABirdsEyeView · 24/09/2024 07:35

It sounds like one of this 'be kind' places, where nobody has to be kind to you.
I can't see that you've done anything wrong - if someone is so delicate, they can't take hearing an alternative opinion, they've no business being on line. You weren't rude or personally attacking them or anything.

toastofthetown · 24/09/2024 08:28

I still would have found a negative or mixed review of the book to comment on than a positive one. I’m not on booktok, but more channels will be like peer to peer book recommendations than a traditional write up. When my friend said ‘I just read Lessons in Chemistry and loved it, have you read it?’ I didn’t respond saying it was the worst book I’d read that year and what I thought was wrong with it, because that’s just going to make her feel bad. I see a lot of Booktok as similar in vibe to that, than leaving a comment on a Guardian (or even someone’s Goodreads review) write-up. You can comment wherever, but people can also say that your comment isn’t welcome.

I’ve been watching Think Again reviews which come onto my feed, because I was underwhelmed and want to see that conversation. I’ve only seen people rave though, which I scroll past because it’s not my vibe and I don’t want to piss on the their chips.

LottieMary · 24/09/2024 08:40

I agree a comments section is a place for discussion about how far you agree or not with the review. But then, I wouldn’t go any where near tik took so …

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