Unwanted gilet

[mateusrose678]

My partner has bought me a gilet. It is too big, navy padded and the kind of thing his Mother might wear.
He says I can wear it when I am wfh to keep warm in winter.
I won't be wearing it. He is hurt that I am not gushing with gratitude.
I have told him he should send it back.
He reckons it was expensive but will be some bargain he has seen online.
AIBU to not fake gratitude for something I didn't ask for or want?

Wait until it gets really cold and wear it under a coat!

Agree this isn’t about the gilet-and all those PP commenting how lovely gilets are, great, but the OP doesn’t like this gilet. It doesn’t sound as if you think your DH is a good person or even likeable. Are there other reasons why you stick with him?

He compares you to his mother....oh gawd you have waaaaay more issues than a damned gilet.
If you don't have kids take the exit 🔜,
If you do have kids definitely take the exit 🏃‍♀️!
If you can't talk to him or he doesn't listen then don't stay in a marriage that's got you questioning yourself. Tell him in no uncertain terms you are his wife not his mother, and if he continues to say 'mum does it this way', 'why don't you use mums technique' blah blah blah ...leave as it won't change.

Ok so your update changes things. Make plans to leave him behind his back, but in the meantime just employ deadpan ignorance. Your presented with an item of clothing you didn’t want or like, just say cheers then leave it to one side. When asked if you like it just answer ‘sure’, when asked why your not wearing it say ‘I do’, ‘I have’, ‘I will’. When compared to other wives just say ‘oh right’ or ‘hmmm’ or ‘yeah’, when he says my mother is like this, does this, isn’t like you, again say ‘I suppose so’. Don’t give him the reaction he wants that he then uses to feign hurt and turn himself into the victim. When you have everything together, leave and enjoy your life, and wear your gilet as tight as you like!

I think he is a covert narcissist who likes to appear to be thoughtful and kind while actually causing problems and acting like the victim

Just dump him. The body warmer is irrelevant. Having a boyfriend is for making life easier and fun.

Ok, this definitely isn’t about the gilet!

Compares you to his mother and wives of friends and finds you wanting? Definitely not ok.