To feel insulted

[insulted4]

I was in town today and browsing in a pharmacy/shop, and a member of staff approached me and asked if I would be interested in a free blood pressure check, which they're offering today. I thought why not? That could be useful to know.

I then went through the process to have this done and after I gave my DOB they said I'm not old enough as you need to be 40. I am only in my very early 30s!

It's really spoiled my day that the original woman thought I was 40+. Maybe I'm being pathetic but I feel like complaining to the shop as approaching people who are nowhere near 40 and assuming they are would upset people. AIBU

I'm sure it didn't feel nice but they are trying to do a good thing for health, having to make really quick judgements about a person's age. I'm not sure what a letter would achieve, but maybe they could work on their wording slightly. 'Offering the check to you or anyone in your life as long as over 40'.

I think I’d of had to say something! The cheek 😂

Don’t complain. It’s really hard to judge ages sometimes.

It could have been a genuine oversight. I work in pharmacy and the company gets paid for each blood pressure reading we take, however, the patient must fit a certain criteria. Being over 35 is on the list of criteria and honestly, my boss properly lays into us multiple times a day for blood pressure readings. He is relentless and causes a lot of anxiety amongst the staff with his hounding. Multi times a day one of us will ask someone who doesn't meet the age criteria, just because we are so on edge about getting them to begin with that we don't even think about the criteria list, we just ask and hope to god the person says yes, then remember afterwards there's a criteria list. I asked a 23 Yr old lad the other day who looked about 17 but at the time of asking, his age never even crossed my mind, knowing my boss would be off my back for about 10 mins did though!

Don't complain. You're putting a value judgement on age. You're the one saying it's insulting to be thought to be over 40 when you're in your 30s.

It's a you problem

Thanks for the response. Yes hoping this was the case, but if managers are putting that pressure on staff to the extent it means they are risking insulting customers to meet numbers surely that needs to be addressed?

Well shop/brand place makes a lot of money from selling anti-aging skincare so if I have a problem with age it's due to corporations like them.

I don’t think this is quite fair. I think the OP feels insulted that people think she looks over 40. On what other criteria would they base their assumption in this circumstance?

And if I was around 40 of course I wouldn't think it was an insult, but who wants to be told they look almost 10 years older than they are?

What wrong with being over 40?

Honestly it's hard to tell the difference between 30-40 most times anyway. It's not a big deal if someone gets anyone's age wrong.

But I bet they were more interested in meeting targets than thinking about your age.

Bit daft to take it personally.

What wrong with being over 40?

Nothing, but staff (who work for a big corporation that sells beauty products and anti aging skincare) are very tactless to assume people's age if they're not sure (and in this case insinuating I look about 10 years older!) I spend a lot of money there and this has put me right off.

Don't complain, that's completely ridiculous. Get a grip.

What would the nature of your complaint be?
Somebody misjudged your age?
Seriously.
WTAF...

Insulting would be if the pharmacist approached you and said 'By Christ you're ugly - can I recommend a surgeon friend of mine?'

That would be insulting. Your scenario is not.

Basically to suggest staff are told to be a bit more mindful when approaching people for age related checks, not just assuming their age and wording it in a better way.

Now I'm wondering what is it about me that makes me look 10 years older than I am? My clothes, posture, make up? I think a lot of women would be a bit upset if someone assumed they are 10 years older than they are?

Ask to see the manager. 😎

I don't think you're being unreasonable. I'd be fuming if someone assumed I was over 50!

I do think they are targeted on how many they do though, so it's likely they weren't being too discerning with who they ask.

It's not necessarily you.

In my experience most people struggle to accurately age anyone who is outside their own sphere of reference. I genuinely can't tell if most younger people are 20 or 30, and the same youngsters routinely tell me I'm 10-15 years younger than I am in reality.

@insulted4

people are shit at guessing ages, stop taking it so personally!

Was it a young person who asked you? I think a lot of teens / early 20s are rubbish at guessing people’s ages. I know I was!

No she was 50+ (and yes I know I'm assuming her age)...

So am I, and as I said, I'm hopeless at guessing ages of younger people because everyone between 20 and 35 looks more or less the same age to me. 😐

Ah, I see. Well try not to take it personally. I understand how it made you feel rubbish in the moment but it really isn’t a reflection of you. Perhaps she is really bad at guessing ages or she only caught a quick glimpse of you.

I think especially if you’re older.

It’s a weird thing, people younger than me all sort of look the same.