Should 3 year old be able to write name?

[toddlerexpectations]

DD turned 3 in April so she's not quite 3.5 yet. She will go to school next September. She can read numbers 1-10 (she recognises them if shown in any random order as opposed to just reciting them in order). She doesn't recognise any letters yet except the letter "S" (first letter of her name). Her speech is advanced and clear according to the HV who did her 3 year check. She can copy basic shapes and she can draw faces (they look more square shaped and robotic but definitely distinguishable as a face with eyes, nose and mouth etc). She goes to a private nursery and her key worker told me that socially and developmentally I could put her in school tomorrow and she'd hit the ground running, which was really lovely feedback to get as she's obviously not due to start school until next year. She loves to dance and is really sociable and chatty.

My question is, should I be teaching her to do anything specific before she starts school next year? Should she be able to fully write her name? Or at least recognise all of her letters? Just any tips on what I should be doing to prepare her for next September would be great. Thank you ☺️

The most important thing before school is self-care, the teachers will take care of the reading and writing. Can she use the toilet independently, including wiping and remembering to flush and wash her hands. Can she get her coat off, and on again and zipped up by herself? Can she feed herself using cutlery? Would she tell an adult if she needed the toilet, had an accident or felt sick?

No need to be able to write her name, of course if she wants to learn to do it the why not. Being able to read their own name is useful as they can then recognise their peg/drawer/book or whatever. Then it's social and self care skills more than anything else. Schools will use a specific scheme for teaching phonics, you could find out what your intended school use and incorporate some of that if you and she are keen.

Thanks both. Yes she can use the toilet independently and flushes, wipes and washes her hands. Only thing she still needs a bit of support with is wiping properly after a poo, she's fine with wees. She does tell us if she feels sick or had a sore tummy etc. She can put trousers and socks on independently, needs help with tops / zipping up coats. She can put her shoes on by herself.

No need to be able to do letters but to give her a good start practise fine motor skills - playdough, fiddly toys like play mobile, popper fidget toys, threading beads, messy play with sand/water/jelly, painting, washing up. Basically anything that strengthens her hands and fingers and improves co-ordination.

Oh and yes she is fine with cutlery.

Oh and if you do one letter do her first letter of her first name and first letter of surname. That way she can put her ‘name’ on her pictures and drawings from the get go and very useful for teacher!

@Fridgetapas
Thank you! First letters of her first name and surname are actually the same so that helps 😂That's the only letter she currently recognises too so that helps.

As a former teacher, it's far more important as PPs have said to be able to dress herself and take responsibility for her belongings etc.

The worst thing is if a parent has taught their child to write their name wrongly and we have to re-teach it. My BiL was very proud of his son being able to write his name, but it was all in capital letters.

@RaraRachael
Haha no I won't be teaching her to write in capitals, don't worry!

If teaching letters, remember its the sound they need to know, not the name of a letter.

Alphablocks really helped my DDs with that.

DD could not write her name when she started school. She just got straight As in her AS levels.

No they don’t need to be able to write their name but some will be able to. (some will be turning 5 as they start!)

i would try and get her to the stage of recognising her name. Maybe a door sign for her bedroom. Ds1 nursery sent a little pack of a few activities to us in lockdown one of the activities was a a laminated paper with his name on with wooden pegs with the a letter on each to spell out his name. We had endless fun hiding the pegs and then clipping them back on the sheet to spell out his name.

don’t forget a year is such a long time compared to her age. She will naturally develop and grow over the next 12 months

Dd is 3 months off 4 and only last week started to write her name. I tried a few times prior to this with her but she wasn’t interested at all, Then someone did it with her at pre school last week and she came home and sat for about an hour writing it over and over. It’s quite a long name and she writes it perfectly. She probably was able to do it before but I think they have to want to do it.

If teaching letters, remember its the sound they need to know, not the name of a letter.

Another friend said that he didn't agree with this stupid "new" way of teaching letters when he'd already taught his son ABC etc

I couldn't be bothered to explain the difference.

It's not essential that she can write it but it is useful if they can at least recognise their name written down.
It sounds like your DD is quite bright though and both my DDs could write their names when they started school so it's something you could work on if you wanted to- but no stress if she's not interested!

Things like going to the toilet and washing hands independently, getting own coat and shoes on and off are more important skills to work on really. School won't expect anything like reading and writing to have been done at home, just a bonus if they can do a bit.

I so agree with this.

No, you don't need to teach her anything beyond potty training and basic social/emotional ability to cope at school.

Also, you seem to be underestimating how long there is until she starts school, she has a whole year to pick up letters.

My DD just started school at 4.5 and has been able to sort of write her name for a while, but she's only just managed to make a recognisable "e"- before they looked more like qs. Out of her class, some can and some can't. It will have no bearing on how successful they become.

I taught my daughter basic phonics before she started school and she therefore joined being able to read simple books independently. It was great for her confidence and general progress at school, and she is still an avid and advanced reader in Year 3. Most people will tell you not to do this, though. However, phonics is not very difficult to understand with a bit of research and it's pretty easy to teach it to one, intelligent child.

In fairness, though, DD knew the alphabet well before she was three, so it depends on the child and their general ability level.

You're DD sounds as if she's doing great! As others have said, teachers and TA's love it when children are independent.
When my children were your daughter's age, or thereabouts, I bought them jigsaw puzzles with their names on and alphabet puzzles. Also, you could try writing her name and then putting tracing paper over the top to trace over. Just be mindful of forming the letters correctly! I'm sure your daughter will be easily writing her name before she starts school by the sound of it but please don't worry if she isn't.
Also anything that develops her fine motor skills. We used to have plastic tweezers and they had to use them to pick up pasta shapes, beads etc. Or threading pasta or beads onto laces. That kind of thing.

No, there's no need for a 3yo to be able to write their name. And certainly no expectation in the early years curriculum that they should do so.
If she goes to nursery, they'll start encouraging her to have a go once she's in the "starts school in September group".

Like others have said, it's much more use to her to be confident in self-care and communication. Especially once she starts school and is in a busy class of 30.

That being said, if she's showing an interest in letters and words, there's no harm in introducing her to some early reading activities - eg: look for words outside in the world that have "her" letter in them. Point out signs as you go past, "oh look, that word says Tesco, what happens in Tesco?" Helping her learn that letters and words carry meanings.

If she is minded to do things school like go to the range and get some preschool play exercise type books - this will give her control of the pencil - its following lines, making shapes, baby join the dots with numbers etc, all will help when she gets to writing etc but as others have said, can she toilet independently can she dress and undress, can she drink from a beaker, use cutlery and have table manners etc

My eldest was like this. And we taught him to write his name, mum but as mom and dad and few other basic words. He knew his ABCs and could recognise most of the letters. Plus his numbers etc. Drawing and able to do zips and buttons.

His teachers were incredibly annoyed with us. They had to unteach him his printing as I didn't teach them with the leads and flicks, (I didn't learn those until the 4th grade) they had to teach him British spellings ie. Mum and not the American. They also learn the alphabet vi's phonic sounds rather than the letter names. It took a whole term to correct and he ended up being behind for a bit even though he is very bright. Hrs now way past that and excelling but it was hard work undoing my teaching and my over parenting.

His reception teacher was very clear that we should leave the teaching to them but to reinforce what they've learnt at school and to keep working on taking turns, discussions, self care and most importantly how to actively listen. They said if a child cannot listen clearly and comprehensively it really impacts on their learning. Do this by reading to them daily and discussing.

His reception teacher did loads of workshops on speech, reading and phonics for us as parents.

Our reception teacher said the best thing to do to prepare them is listening skills, so that they can properly take in the phonics lessons.

So little walks and talking about what sounds you can hear etc.

If she's at nursery, I would expect them to have a go at teaching her to write her name. I know DS' nursery did a lot of prep for school in the term before he left. I wouldn't worry about doing it yourself.