Weird or ND?

[Bakensmile]

A bit of a weird one and I’m not sure if I have sensory issues or am just an absolute weirdo…

When I was very young (around 6) I started to hate the way paper felt on my hands, this would be especially worse and totally unbearable after washing my hands and drying them. I was fine to wash my hands, the water didn’t bother me but as soon as they were dry it was just the worst feeling in the world I would have to clench them super tight so I sweat a little to re moisturise them. I was too young to communicate how it felt to my parents but started to avoid washing my hands. At one stage I would constantly lick my hands to keep them moist (gross).

Fast forward to when I was slightly older I discovered the wonders of Vaseline and it changed my life. After washing or just randomly when I felt this awfulness on my hands (now started feeling it in between my toes too) I would slap some Vaseline on, rub it in and it helped immensely. I am mid 30s now and still do this. It rules my life to a certain extent. I can’t go anywhere or do anything without making sure I have a Vaseline pot handy. My maternal aunt is actually the same which I didn’t learn until I was older and noticed Vaseline pots everywhere in her house!

My just turned 7 year old has been complaining for a couple of weeks about how her hand and toes feel, especially when she touches paper. I have also caught her licking her hands a few times. I feel awful as I know what she is feeling but I distract her and she seems ok after a little while. I don’t want to introduce Vaseline to her as I know it will be with her for life! I’ve tried using a moisturiser but she said it didn’t help (never did for me either).

Is this a neurodivergent issue? Sensory? I am clueless about SEN. Can this be ‘fixed’? Anyone else experience this?

posting on AIBU for traffic

YABU - you are a weirdo
YANBU - you have sensory issues of some sort

I don’t want to introduce Vaseline to her as I know it will be with her for life!

I’d try her with the Vaseline so she doesn’t have to think about her hands and can focus her mind on other things.

Is it wrong for Vaseline to be in her life forever ? It’s inexpensive, inoffensive and not harmful unless you’re spending your whole day putting it on in which case I’m surprised that dd hasn’t asked to try it.

Your neither you have dry skin that's aggravated by hand soap, this is a common issue that oftenruns in families, hence the numerous brands of hand specific moisturisers.
Give your dc some moisturiser and learn to accept that you both need it before she ends up with issues over using it or painfully split dry hands and feet which can lead to skin infections

I’d be more inclined to investigate whether you have something like icthyosis or just very dry skin. (When you lick it it can taste/smell salty.) I can’t stand the feel of my skin, but I have a connective tissue disorder and my skin feels weird.

ND seems like a bit of a wild leap. My mum uses that Norwegian stuff several times a day. I don't think that she is ND either

I guess it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world but I hate that all door handles etc are greasy in my house and that I’m constantly worrying about my hands feeling dry. I just rather her not go through this!

Just googled that condition - definitely don’t have that. In fact my skin isn’t particularly dry it’s very ‘normal’. I just can’t bare the feeling of it naturally with no Vaseline.

If your door handles are greasy your either using to much, not rubbing it in properly or using the wrong moisturiser for your needs.
Try using less and rubbing it in better or try a lighter moisturiser

So I've had this with warm water (has to be hot or cold) and touching things like sand or chalk. I also carry hand lotion with me everywhere as I can't stand the feeling of dry hands.

Autism and ADHD are heavily in the family and I have ADHD...but I have friends with neither who are exactly the same and have textures they hate. So...could be either one.

The Norwegian hand cream is similar to Vaseline in texture. OP, it would be worth trying for your daughter - it feels different to other hand creams I've tried.

Sensory issues don’t automatically mean ND. I would introduce your daughter to Vaseline - it works so why wouldn’t you?

It’s also worth seeing if you can get a dermatologist to see if there is an issue. You can go for yourself if you prefer since it sounds like something hereditary.

Also speak to the senco at school to see if they have noticed anything ride or any concerns they have. As someone who is autistic and with lots of ND in the family, it seems unusual to me to have the same sensory issues in three generations which would make me think it’s not that.

Its just a sensory issue doesnt necessarily mean anything.
You may all be copying from each other.
My dc are nd
Weve had
Sock issues
Toenail picking
Biting nail and fingers
Picking arm
Hair brushimg issues
Teeth brushing
Noise sensitivity
Obsessive hand washing
Not drinking enough

I can't settle down at home until I've washed my hands. If I've been out, even just for a walk, and I've touched literally nothing, I still need to wash my hands when I come in. My skin feels horrible, and I can't mentally "settle" until I've done it.
I also have some things that I just CAN NOT touch. One is velvet, but the absolute worst one is those magic sponges. Just thinking about them makes me feel gross.
I'm also obsessive over lipbalm. I can't bear my lips feeling even a little bit dry. I'd say I'm within 5 feet of a lipbalm at all times!