Tell me, if you are feeling sad, what small things do you do to prevent depression

[Whatthefuck3456]

Feeling low. Apart from gp. Any advice please.

I sometimes feel like I'm teetering on the edge of depression, and my small things to do are mostly as PP have suggested:

• walking in nature
• listening to upbeat music (MUST be upbeat - happy playlists on Spotify are easy to find)
• bake something easy (cookies, cupcakes, flapjack)
• craft/paint or make a card for someone's birthday
• read a light book
• any other self care stuff you like - I enjoy a homemade exfoliating scrub (sugar, oil, essential oil to fragrance), a hot(tish) shower with music, a face mask with those fake cucumber eye mask thingies

If I wasn't so bad at that type of thing I'd also add painting my nails and putting on makeup to that list!

Oh yes, the big one - get off social media including mumsnet. Sadly there are lots of threads on here that are absolutely mood draining.

Tell everyone I know. It really helps.
Exercise
No social funding media or anything online (no Mumsnet!)

Start with allowing whatever it is you are feeling rather than suppressing it/distracting/resisting. Google “how to feel your feelings / how to process your emotions”. Also try meditation, movement and being in nature. Connect with loved ones.

Tidy my house.
Fresh bedding
Shower/ make up.
Walk in nature.
Spend time marvelling at how awesome my pets are.
Watch a comedy. (Or something soppy and sad first if I need a good cry).
Remember that it won’t always be like this.

I start taking supplements - iron, Vit D, B complex. L-Tyrosine, Magnesium, Berocca sometimes

I try to increase exercise - online 10-15 minute body weight, yoga or kettlebell videos if I can't face going out, bootcamp and yoga flow if I can.

I stop watching and reading all the news and all crime dramas and novels. I switch to comedy films, series, TV recordings of good stand up shows, and feel-good movies. I play only really calming piano or mood music or upbeat songs.

I have a mantra - 'you don't have to want to, you just have to do it' about stuff like showering, teeth, clean clothes that look nice.

I make lists of what I have achieved each day, not to-do lists. They are very good at showing you that you may feel like you stared into space or went to bed all day but actually you got the DC up and dressed and fed and off to school, fed the pets, the birds, put a wash load on, watched a helpful online video about depression or did sme online CBT worksheets, had a shower, bought milk, collected Dc from school and fed them, bathed them, got them to bed. You realise you are contributing to the world in small ways even if it is just feeding wild birds and making sure your DC get to school and back and are fed.

I write gratitude journals. I know some people hate the, as they feel it's like saying: you have all this so you should be happy and grateful and not depressed. But for me it helps to say: even though I feel depressed I am glad of these small things happening in life.

I've learned to tell myself it will pass, it always does eventually, so meanwhile, look after yourself.

Exercise

Exercise for me. Even I'd it's just a walk around the block with a podcast one. Nice bath, clean pjs watching crap tv. I agree with the no alcohol thing, but im working on that🤣. Be kind to yourself OP x

Oh I forgot two important ones!

Feed the birds in the garden - they're funny and cute charging at the seeds. They do make me smile.

Sniff my cat's tummy or kiss her head - even while she's scratching me.

These two have helped me loads.

I go small. I look for something tiny that is wonderful. This is usually something in the natural world - a flower, an unfurled leaf, dew on a spider web. Anything that I can spot.

I find having something really small but wonderful to focus my attention on completely for a minute or two - which is harder than it sounds - pulls my focus out of my negativity and spiralling. It grounds me in the natural world and gives me space to breathe deep and start again.

This very tiny fern growing in a derelict brick wall helped me this week. It’s smaller than my thumb but perfectly formed and so hopeful, thriving in a polluted part of an inner city as if it were a rainforest.

I get outside, even in the rain with a coat and wellies. A walk in the country or a kayak up the river, anything to be outside. Also, arrange an activity with friends so there’s low pressure for chatting and something to do.

Get out in the fresh air then light the fire and stroke the cats.

Dress up warm and go for a walk around lake near to my house. There are geese and ducks swimming there. I walk past a children's BMX bike track and all the DC seem to be having fun. I usually take a hot chocolate with me in a thermal cup and half way around I sit and listen watch things: irds, the ducks and geese, sometimes children riding bikes around the path. I breathe in and out deeply. I look at the leaves on the trees changing colour. Then I walk back home. It takes about an hour.

I find laughter really therapeutic so I look for things that I find laugh-out-loud funny, comedy shows etc. The most extreme example I have is after a 4 or 5-month period of being really unhappy at work I saw a funny play (Present Laughter by Noel Coward with Andrew Scott leading a brilliant cast) and it had me in stitches, like actual helpless laughter. It was so unexpected but I felt like it kind of reset my state of mind and I was able to pull back out of the spiral of sadness I had been in.

For me:

Being outside in nature helps. Even more so if I'm able to take in the wonder of things that I'm guilty of taking for granted- so clouds, wind, birds, trees for example are all pretty awe inspiring.

Podcasts. Funny ones, educational ones and kind ones.

Books and audiobooks.

Talking to a non judgemental, kind friend who is able to really listen.

Cold water swimming is, for me, a reliable and remarkable way to boost my mood and make difficult stuff seem somehow more bearable.

Gratitude- not a Pollyanna style spin on things that are genuinely rubbish. More a mindset of noticing that there are things I'm grateful for every single day. No matter how shit that day is!

The serenity prayer, (but without the 'Lord' bit as I don't have a faith), I come back to it again and again and find it incredibly helpful.

Nudging myself to be mindful that I'm a tiny, insignificant being. Things like seeing the sea, the stars and remembering how long the earth has been hosting life compared to how long humans have existed help me to remember this.

Knowing from age and life experience that the phrase "this too shall pass" is very true. I may not know when something will pass, but so far, without fail, everything has eventually and gradually become more easy to manage over time.

Choosing the company of non-judgemental, kind people who love me as I am, warts and all. Similarly, avoiding people who judge, criticise and need me to be someone else.

My cat and dog. One hates me, one adores me. They are very precious.

Knowing that change and loss are an inevitable part of life. I guess this is linked to realising that it's unrealistic to expect to be happy or content all the time.

Allowing myself to feel my feelings rather than trying to avoid them. This one is hard!

There’s not actually any evidence that depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain. There’s a lot of evidence that sadness / depression is a response to your environment.

Make a hot drink and get an early night.
do not drink alcohol (an obvious depressant)
do not have your mobile in your bedroom
in the morning get up and go for a walk
only look at your phone/screen after breakfast
play some relaxing music in your house
Light a nice smelling candle
visit a garden or spend some time working in your own garden
read a book
go for a walk with a friend

Cry. It helps

yup, sometimes if Im feeling sad (for no good reason I can think of!) I will put on a sad movie and just have a little wallow. Sometimes you just have to allow yourself to feel the feelings.

But also walks in nature, a good book or funny movie, bath with candles and clean sheets and jammies and cuddles with my dogs all cheer me up too!

Absolutely this. And stop, breathe in, tune in to the sounds around you whatever they are. Mindfulness I think.

Just getting out into the fresh air for a walk any where helps me.

St John’s wort (possibly a placebo but seems to help)
avoiding things or people who you know bring you down
walking
music and singing

I hate exercise at the best of times, but it is absolutely true (much to my annoyance!) that it helps with mental health. I force myself to do it and it definitely helps. Good luck OP!

I get weather appropriate clothes on, grab my pitchfork and some gloves and go and move some compost. Usually involves taking the sides and top off a compost bin, taking the incomposed stuff off and pitching the composted stuff into a wheelbarrow to put into a veggie bed. It is so good for the mind, body and soul. If it is relatively dry, I won't even wear gloves.

Or I'll go and sieve some leaf mould from last winters leaves to make potting and seed compost. I have a huge bin of old sieved leaf mould which gets added to each year and the worms that live in there just turn it into wonderful clean compost each season.

Great thread and some great replies. My offering is journalling, and 'proper' walking ( not just round the block, and ideally by the sea or on the hills)
Hope you feel better soon @Whatthefuck3456

This is a lovely thread.
I make myself a timetable and write down one nice thing per day, for me, because otherwise it's never going to happen.
It's usually a brisk walk, 30mins birdwatching or a nice bakery cake!